epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Robin Of Sherwood (1984 - 1986) 1x02 + The Walking Dead 5x02 + Profit (1996) 1x03 Reviewed

Robin Hood and the Sorcerer part 2
This HTV take on the legend had pagans, Clannad and Michael Praed of ‘Dynasty’ and ‘Nightflyers’ as the first Robin Hood. Robin poses in a tree in the opening credits and is after a silver arrow that belongs to Herne. Maid Marian whispers and joins a nunnery. Robin and his mullet does nothing really. It looks like a Timotei commercial. The evil satan worshipping Baron Simon de Belleme (Anthony Valentine of ‘Raffles’) lurks. This was boring whilst the 2006 BBC version was just crap.

Sir Guy is blonde and ineffective and does not wear black leather. It’s not the Dung Ages, everyone looks clean. The Sheriff of Nottingham lurks. There is an archery contest, a great big pig and longbows. There are no outrageous character traits, people do somersaults off walls and the Baron waves his devil worshipping totem around in plain sight. The Normans seem sanguine about an openly satanic noble. Brother Tuck lurks. There are bad fight scenes. Anthony Valentine is wasted, even he looks bored. This was so very, very boring and I’m demotivated to watch more.

Best Lines:
“That pathetic Saxon rebellion.”

“I’m to be a nun.”

“Why risk your life for an arrow?”
“Because I must.”

“After them!”

“But not with hellfire.”

“Give her to me.”

“One headstrong Saxon virgin.”

Rick has fake outrage and piles contempt on top. The gang encounter a priest named Gabriel and are breathtakingly arrogant and storm his church. Angrily aggrieved Rick is all: trespassers will be violated. Rick is actively irritating, everyone else is generic and the plot is the usual sameness. The gang go to a supermarket they may have been to in an earlier season. The plot is anticlimactic to say the least and repetitive. The acting is the flattest and stiffest. Every line is either shouted or delivered in their best serious grown up voice. The unremittingly poisonous Rick is the most sensitive man in America. I wonder why no-one has died from drinking untreated water or eating spoiled food. This episode raised my personal irritation level.

This was all folly, obduracy and was a right mess. Rick is vehemently opposed to logic and empathy. There is a loud silence in opposition to him. I find scant interest in Rick and his pontificating. The misused Beth is mentioned. Terminus survivors show up and eat someone.

Best Lines:
“You are not safe.”

“Never let your guard down. Ever.”

“Undead pricks.”

“The living will have this world again.”

“You’re not dead yet.”

“What are you doing?”
“I don’t know.”

This was the only misfire of the 8 episode run. Profit wanders around his luxurious penthouse. Bobbi shows up to blackmail him with a Dictaphone. Bobbi revels in her squalor. G&G’s chief legal council shows up and says Chaz has to hire lawyer Jeffrey Sykes. Chaz and Pete’s unseen father is pot stirring. Sykes has a druggie gal pal, who breaks up with him due to the events of this ep. A Russian gangster does gangster stuff. There is spitefulness and baby laxative.

Sykes plots. Joanne rants about Jack to Profit. Pete has Jack’s old office. Frumpy Nora is frumpy. There are mentions of computer discs and modems. No-one has decency. Sykes grins and there are banal dysfunctions and nothing is plausible or emotionally appealing. Bobbi has psycho-dramatics and fakes being an interior decorator. Joanne and Profit have drama. Elizabeth has moved to be neat Jack’s prison. This show exists in the land of very bad clothes.

This was not unsettling and Profit is manhandled by the Russian gangster. Joanne has furious pain and limited understanding. This was an abysmal misfire. Profit plots in crafty and cunning fashion. The capricious, unsympathetic, megalomaniacal sociopath Sykes has wrong-headedness. Profit wants Sykes gone but he won’t go. There is no whiff of weirdness. Sykes and his secrets makes himself comfortable in the Business Affairs division. Jim has lost. But he pays off the Russian gangster’s prison guards so the gangster won’t kill him. This was mediocre.

Best Lines:
“I smell Bobbi.”

“I’m looking for a new husband. Since you killed the last one.”

“Who filed a class action lawsuit against us. And won.”

“Married to his cousin drug dealer.”

“Cheap ass world.”

“You let that creature put drugs in my purse?”

“Servicing you tonight is the least of my troubles.”

“Bash your head in.”

“The day he gets hit by a bus, I believe in god again.”

“You’re in acquisitions, go acquire him.”

“I ain’t working.”

“Brother from hell.”

“What’s your modem number?”

“The crap you pulled.”

“I win Jim.”

“I kinda like it here on the power side.”
Tags: profit, review, the walking dead
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