epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: The Facts In The Case Of Mister Hollow + Wild Things 3 + 15 Others

The Facts In The Case Of Mister Hollow (2008)
A short film about a photo. There are files, books, letters and clippings about paganism, child disappearances, ancient Greek and Roman gods and the word Keres. The photo changes and what initially looks innocuous isn’t. There are weird tattoos, a body, something in the fire, a gun, nails, rope and a cloak. This was good and creepy. What happened to these people after the paranormal manifestation?

Wild Things 3: Diamonds In The Rough (2005)
The 1st one was luridly good, the 2nd was dire and I’ve never seen the 4th. But based on this, I think I’ll skip the 4th. This is down there with cheese like ‘Identity’, ‘Darkness Falls’ and ‘Thir13en Ghosts’. A blonde rich idiot who never wears a bra fights a poor brunette (Sandra McCoy of ‘Supernatural’). Blondie plots against her evil stepfather and wants diamonds. The stepfather is arrested and cops (Linden Ashby and Dina Meyer) investigate. Hooker wear is worn. People obsess over the diamonds. This has gratuitous sex, body doubles and is vile.

The school in this is the original Sunnydale High from ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer’. This is not a shameless sleazefest nor is it a ridiculously convoluted OTT thriller. Nor is it hysterically campy entertaining trash. It is just wooden and dreary. There is double crossing, violence, no sense of place and a dumb ‘twist ending’.

Best Lines:
“Hey watch the hair!”

“Mind if Chad joins in?”

“Chad likes the sound of that.”

The Forsaken (2001)
A rip off of ‘Near Dark’, ‘The Lost Boys’ and ‘John Carpenter’s Vampires’. This stars Kerr Smith and Brendan Fehr and vampires menace them. Okay.

The Sweetest Thing (2002)
Moronic smut fest.

Suicide Kings (1997)
Christopher Walken and Jay Mohr star in this kidnapping film that has gun waving, screaming and psychological warfare. This was enjoyable but the acting is bad.

Best Line:
“Your plan. I’m gonna remember that.”

Susan’s Plan (1998)
This was unfunny crap about greedy yelling morons that was boring and unfunny.

Strike (1998)
A boarding school comedy set in 1963. Funny and good.

The Skulls (2000)
Lame, dated and stars Joshua Jackson and Paul Walker.

Sgt Kabukiman, NYPD (1996)
From Troma, this is a tale of a cop with Kabuki powers. Funny and entertaining.

The Brutal Truth (1999)
A high school reunion at a house goes awry. Okay.

The Bulldance (1989)
This is a bizarre tale set in Crete that stars Robert Beltran and Samantha Mathis. This was strange, turgid and makes no sense.

Blair Witch 2: Book Of Shadows (2000)

Chain Reaction (1996)

Speed (1994)

Crooks In Cloisters (1963)

Copycat (1995)

Little Shop Of Horrors (1986)
The dentist song is the standout.
Tags: movie review

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