epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Arrow 3x13 + How To Get Away With Murder 1x06 + The Blacklist 2x10 + The Musketeers 2x08 Reviewed

Laurel does hero stuff and her wig never comes off. Oliver needs to go away. Malcolm lurks and enunciates like Shatner. Oliver dictates to everyone. Who cares about Thea? Count Vertigo II escapes and gurns. DJ dick and Thea bill and coo. Oliver shows Thea the arrowcave and she claims to be understanding. Thea makes it all about her. The Hong Kong flashbacks bore as does Amanda Waller. Nobody mentions if Ted Grant is okay. Oliver calls Laurel an addict.

Oliver was and is a tool. Count Vertigo II recognises Laurel and does her and she hallucinates Sara (Caity Lotz). There is a Canary fight but no wigs come off. Laurel bleeds. Laurel is covered in buckles. Roy is sick of Oliver’s crap and so is Felicity. Diggle is just boring. Felicity badmouths Sara. Thea realises DJ dick is a lying liar who lies.

Roy and Malcolm somehow show up at an opportune moment. DJ dick dies. Nobody notices this or two people running around in fetish outfits. There is a ‘Breaking Bad’ rip-off. Black Canary and Arrow team up; Laurel gets dosed again and beats Count Vertigo II down. Laurel finally tells Quentin about Sara. Oliver pisses off again and this time takes Thea to Lian Yu. This show is struggling and has a serious lack of aspiration.

Best Lines:
“You’re not a hero.”

“Reformed playboy and failed businessman.”

“Epically epic.”

“God forgive me.”

“I will weep for thee.”

“You smell like smoke. Korean barbecue?”

“Be glad.”

“Boy hair.”

“I fancy the new outfit.”

“Selfish bitch.”

“You should be dead. I salute your persistence!”

“Can you live with what it’s become?”

“You think you can be me?”

“Not my baby, not again.”

Freakin’ Whack-A-Mole
Wes delights in his power over Annalise. The Keating 5 do a death row appeal. This is not the most subtle of TV dramas as Annalise rants. Wes outmans everyone and I’m thinking of dropping this show. People mumble about judicial misconduct. Asher has daddy issues. This was boring with useless flashforwards and Laurel is accused of leading Frank the sexist on. Frank is an ass, Annalise needs Sam and WTF is up with Bonnie? Who killed Sam? Also Frank and Annalise aren’t as clever as they think they are.

Best Lines:
“You haven’t been answering your phone or your door.”

“Old ladies find me charming.”

“Pressure to convict.”

“Do I detect prejudice in your voice?”

“You ungrateful little twit.”

“Take that back!”
“Why should he?”

Luther Braxton (no 21): Conclusion
The Level 10 detention facility is escaped with ease. Braxton has Liz. Where did he get a private medevac chopper? There is bad green screen and negative notions. TPTB need to give this show a serious rethink. Braxton hurls wild accusations. Few characters have personality. Braxton is nonplussed about menacing but that deal’s not flying these days. This show isn’t boundary pushing, intoxicating or infectious anymore.

I’ve no idea what’s coming and I don’t care. A doctor is told to retrieve a memory of Liz’s. Nobody is unassuming, kind or socially intelligent. Red and co somehow get off the oil rig. Red does stone faced tutting and sighing as he can’t quite maintain patience with Braxton. There is babble about a memory extinction gene. My intrinsic confidence in this show is gone.

Liz recalls the fire 26 years ago and her toy rabbit. There is yelling about Liz’s father. Men make heavy handed metaphors to each other. Braxton is no longer content to be a minion. Red makes sex jokes. Who is the main antagonist of this show? WTF is the fantastical fulcrum? Why did Liz’s home burn down? Why should I care? TPTB need to detoxify Liz. There is a soured relationship between Liz and Red which begets boredom.

Braxton is dead, Liz’s memories have been blocked and Liz rips up her beloved old rabbit toy and discovers a device she never noticed before in 26 years. Oh piss off show. Where is Tom? Have TPTB remembered that Cooper is dying? This was terrible.

Best Lines:
“Is burning.”

“It does not exist, it never existed.”

“This never occurred.”

“This rig is sinking.”

“I told you so.”

“A memory she has no memory of.”

“They’ve come to an end. Mr Braxton has started something he can’t finish.”

“What’s in it for us?”

“Where is she?”


“If you’re looking for your driver. He’s napping in the trunk.”

“I know just what you are.”

“I know exactly who you are. A thug.”

“Call my bluff. Please, call my bluff.”

The Prodigal Father
Rochefort has no great lucidity and speaks and thinks in the same emotionally deadened tone that shows he is a psychotic creature. Porthos meets his long lost daddy in an un-emotional journey. Constance bores and d’Artagnan is an ass. Porthos aristo daddy lives in shadows and sob stories. Aramis is not very bright. Treville broods. Porthos meets his sleazy family. Constance should be whipped as a harlot not prancing around the palace with two suitors after her.

Fragile autocrat Louis XIII fears he will be assassinated like his father and Rochefort has a strange appeal to him. Anne only has one attendant and still thinks Rochefort is great hero, honest and that he a disarming smile or something. So why did she regift his jewelled crucifix to Aramis? Porthos’ new family lack any tact or sensitivity. Milady disgusts Athos with her plotting. This was not riveting or brilliantly intense.

Porthos and Treville have shallowly constructed issues. People have violent mindsets. Sex trafficking is uncovered, d’Artagnan flicks his messianic locks whilst Aramis has born again radicalism. This had no whimsy or steely conviction. Rochefort causes Louis distress through a campaign of deliberate misinformation. As the atmosphere in court grows more toxic Anne finally becomes aware that the deeply disturbing and undignified Rochefort is psychosexually fixated on her and pokes him in the eye with a hairpin. But it’s too late for her even as his pernicious aspects are clear to her. There will be unforeseeable consequences from him seeing her as behaving improperly.

This episode was egregious, heinous and hypersensitive. Anne just confesses her treasonous adultery to Constance. Porthos just accepts preconceptions and conjecture. There are unflinching indignities and injuries all around along with wider prejudices. In all this ep had no eloquence. Bellicose rhetoric is shouted, Constance needs to die and Rochefort expectorates that he’s been obsessed with Anne since she was 14. There was bad acting, Anne is repulsed, Constance crawls back to d’Artagnan. There is grumpy complaining, coldness, errant aristocrats, desperate contrivance, angry narcissism and seething resentment. I feel large scale indifference for this reducible, shambloic, derisory ep that was full of lofty pomposity.

Best Lines:
“I had my reasons, good ones.”

“I’m glad he’s dead.”

“Why should we mourn him?”

“Rochefort is growing more powerful by the day.”

“Raise your glass Eleanor.”

“My wife is not related to you!”

“He comes from trade and lacks any breeding.”

“You and I could be content together.”

“This is your home. Get used to it.”

“He told me things.”

“Absolutely charming wife.”

“No whore’s trick.”

“Clandestine but legal.”

“Ungrateful witch of a daughter.”

“It is bigger than yours.”

“Your servants answer to me now.

“The King will hear of your adultery with the musketeer Aramis! Guards! Come quickly there is treason in our midst! TREASON!”
Tags: arrow, how to get away with murder, musketeers, the blacklist

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