epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: Evil Dead: Extended Cut + The Dead Pool + The Dish

Evil Dead (2013) Extended Cut
David, Eric, Mia (Jane Levy), Olivia and Natalie head to a remote cabin in the woods because Mia is struggling with sobriety. Eric the idiot finds The Book Of The Dead in the basement and unwisely reads from it thus summoning up dormant demons. This was an okay remake but what was the point. Sure the first two original ‘Evil Dead’ movies were crap but why remake them?

The gang hang around the inhospitable place. Sad eyes Mia has reluctance to engage with the others due to Olivia’s scornful denunciation of her addiction and the increasing systemic doubt of everything she says. Olivia stands sternly and stubbornly annoys and has distain for Mia. David is curiously formless. Mia is increasingly hysterical and emotion is incontinently displayed. She is also out shouted by the more assertive characters.

Something malevolent is out there. Self destructive protagonist Mia is subjected to demon rape and possession and afterwards her pleas for help are meet with barked dismissals. Olivia likes to blame the most vulnerable for her own misfortune. This was not bitingly realistic. The wild force is in Mia and it propagates. David’s galpal Natalie has an uneventful stare. Levy is committed to her role. David and Eric’s stupidity is almost impossible to tolerate. Why won’t Eric stop reading the freakish book?

The demons are cruel and feared. There is a nail gun attack, blood, chainsaws, electric carving knife, sap, cgi, fire and over the top gore. This was devoid of scares. There is also a pointless Bruce Campbell cameo. (Channel 4 was sent the wrong master which it aired. The master was returned to the studio and will not be aired again. It had an additional 4 minutes of footage and seems to have been the extended cut).

Best Lines:
“I have seen the dark shadows moving in the woods and I have no doubt that whatever I have resurrected is sure to come calling for me.”

“I will rip your soul out.”

“There is something dead and it reeks.”

“You’re all going to die tonight.”

“The Abomination will rise from hell.”

“What kind of a virus makes a person cut off their face with a piece of glass?”

“We’re all going to be dead by then.”

“Maybe we’ve all gone crazy.”

“Don’t die on me please.”

“She waits for you in hell.”

“Go back to hell bitch.”

The Dead Pool (1988)

The Dish (2000)
Sam Neill wears a cardi.
Tags: cult, gotham, movie review

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