epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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12 Movie Reviews

Money For Nothing (1993)
Based on a true story. Bags of money fall off an armoured truck in Philadelphia and are found by unemployed waterfront worker Joey (John Cusack). He decides finders’ keepers. Joey starts spending, lying and is unable to comprehend money laundering. His idiot best friend (Michael Rapaport) is dumb, his gal pal (Debi Mazar) is dragged in and a cop (Michael Madsen) looks for the money.

There is arrogance, hypocrisy and a rotary phone joke. A jerkass barfly (Philip S. Hoffman) lurks, a thug (Bencio Del Toro) wears a purple puffa jacket, has an anchor around his neck and sports 90s hair. Joey is truly stupid and his bad boss is his brother (James Gandolfini). There is fighting, wryness, Joey pulls a gun and tries to escape loser town. There are no tender souls and this wasn’t that good. The real Joey killed himself just before this movie was released.

Best Lines:
“You don’t find that kind of money just lying on the street.”
“Just did.”

“It ain’t against the law to find money.”
“Just to keep it.”

“They’ll handcuff you to a desk.”

“It costs money to find money.”

“Take your husband to bed!”

“I want you out of this house!”

“Your very own key to the toilet.”

“Don’t be a punk.”

Firefox (1982)
Clint Eastwood has to steal a stealth plane from the USSR. He dislikes wearing shirts and is miserable. This is a premise squandering, glum and joyless film that is totally devoid of meaning or any potential statement. This is not coherent, purposeful or a sage commentary. It is just risible noise with bad SFX, plane stealing and death. Give me the ‘Iron Eagle’ quadrilogy or ‘Flight of Black Angel’ instead.

Best Line:
"They know now."

The Day of the Triffids (1962)
Unfaithful, silly and sees the Triffids defeated with salt water.

The Pacifier (2005)
I wish Vin Diesel would stop being in stuff.

Demolition Man (1993)
Very very loud.

Striking Distance (1993)

Scrooged (1988)
Only the Lee Majors cameo is funny.

Romancing The Stone (1985)

The Village (2004)
It has a twist don’t you know.

Predator 2 (1990)
Ridiculous and populated by the biggest idiots in the galaxy.

The Mummy Returns (2001)
Rick v The Scorpion King, silly.

Planet Terror (2007)
Dumb and has Freddy Rodriguez on a tiny bike.
Tags: day of the triffids, movie review

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