epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

  • Music:

Arrow 3x04 + The Blacklist 2x08 + Reign 1x17 + Agents Of SHIELD 2x06 Reviewed

The Magician
Season 3 has been directionless up until now. Oliver and Thea are Pottery Barn poor. The Hong Kong flashbacks meander. Nyssa shows up to do butt shimmys. Laurel is immune to subtlety. Where is Sin, why isn’t she even mentioned? Why was Sara’s gravestone never removed? Nyssa cries and Oliver finally learns Malcolm Merlyn is alive. Oliver broods in his American Apparel pastels but says not a word about Tommy. There is ghost ink, a nanotechnology tracer arrow and a blood bounty. What about the ruin porn? Have the Glades been rebuilt? Oliver does dogmatic manhood. Malcolm Merlyn doesn’t seem to care that Tommy is dead. Nobody recognises Malcolm. This was good and was vastly improved thanks to the absence of the cringe worthy Felicity from the majority of the episode. Oliver seems curiously empty.

Amanda Waller yells and there is a revelation about the attempted downing of the plane back in season 1. Thea lies. Malcolm knows stuff and lies. Oliver doesn’t avenge Tommy’s death or even seem to care Tommy is dead. Oliver protects Malcolm because he is a moron. I hope it rebounds on him horribly. Ra’s al Ghul shows up.

Best Lines:
“The convenient thing about dead men, is that no-one tends to believe them.”

“The best ones never do.”

“You are not fit to wear it.”

“She promised me there wouldn’t be any, you know, assassinating.”

“I will kill you where you sit.”

“He killed Tommy and 502 other innocent people.”

“It’s illogical.”

“You’re a killer.”
“Yes, I am.”

“All of his words are lies.”

“Malcolm fathered another child.”

“We have to stop her.”
“Do we?”

“You’re a bum.”

“You crazy psycho bitch.”

“Yours is the devil.”

“Over your rotting corpse.”

“He killed Sara, Tommy.”

“No prison can hold us!”

“You deserve worse.”

“Oliver Queen courts war with us.”

The Decembrist (no. 12)
Liz screamed at Tom and was a bitch. Season 2 is disheartening, Liz is being ruined. Berlin, Red and Berlin’s not dead daughter chat. Berlin is but a minion. Liz is awful. Berlin is really unimportant and a letdown. Berlin and Red ally or something. Alan (Alan Alda) is the big bad or something and then he is blown up after blubbering. There is bad acting and more hints as to why Red vanished back in the day but I don’t care. This show makes no damn sense.

Tom manipulates and gets away. Ressler sneers. Liz apparently never bothered to ask Tom who he really is. What is The Fulcrum and why should anyone care? Red kills Berlin, well that was a wasted plotline. Liz still loves Tom. Then there is a big twist regarding Tom and Red which makes no damn sense at all. This was terrible.

Best Lines:
“He cannot die.”

“We’re shaking a few trees.”

“To what end?”
“To his end as it turned out.”

“I’m coming for you.”
“Good luck with that.”

“How do we disable it?”

“Think harder!”

“It wasn’t worth it.”

Liege Lord
Kenna whines, Lola’s new beau is problematic and Mary whines. Mary is told that her marriage contract gives Scotland to France if she dies. The real Mary knew that all along and never cared as the throne of England meant more to her than her own. Francis is dumb. There is wooden acting. Henri shows off his coercive control, there is a stupid man, ridiculous outfits, tarty tartan and Penelope the wannabe Anne Boleyn enjoys her triumph. Henri makes sex jokes, Catherine shags a Scot but has an agenda, Kenna whines and there are murders. Mary slaps Catherine and this show is much improved. There is more foreshadowing of Mary’s fate.

Best Lines:
“Sent to sleep with important noblemen.”

“Without an heir you’re worth more to them dead than alive!”

“All my life I have been a chess piece in other people’s courts.”

“Tedious though her company may be.”

“Men will trust you and die.”

“You lost. Take it with grace.”

“The House of Valois is ripe to topple.”

A Fractured House
There is a mention of the Avengers, Talbot is right about SHIELD and Hydra attack the UN pretending to be SHIELD. Simmons and Skye diss Ward. Coulson is a tool. Mockingbird whines. Ward’s rat brother Senator Christian Ward (Tim DeKay of ‘White Collar’) shows up to over-act and rant. Mockingbird and Hunter have boring issues. Fitz is sidelined and unnecessary. Coulson wants to protect his Incredibly Important Job and protect his tyrannical hierarchy. Skye gloats about being in the success club. TPTB are the destroyers of mediocrity as season 2 finally has promise. Hunter is unmanned by Mockingbird. May won’t shut up, she and Skye should go work as camgirls or something. Fitz whines and I don’t care about him, Mockingbird or Hunter. Coulson and SHIELD prepare to hand Ward over to his abuser because they’re smug assholes. Christian lies. Coulson smugs and overacts. Mockingbird does ‘cool fight’ stuff. There is no nowness. Tripp is an ass to Simmons, who does he think he is. Ward does a walk of shame and is mocked by his former colleagues. Talbot turns into a SHIELD lickarse. Ward escapes, I’m Team Ward because SHIELD are jerks who need to go down hard.  Brian Van Holt of ‘Threshold’ and ‘House of Wax’ shows up in the final scene.

Best Lines:
“This wasn’t us, was it?”

“Almost killed Barton a few years back.”

“Put SHIELD in the ground for good.”

“This isn’t about you.”
“Isn’t it?”

“The American people are looking for a single enemy.”

“He keeps telling them.”

“Hail Hydra guys!”

“Cast a shadow over us all.”
Tags: agents of shield, arrow, reign, the blacklist

Comments for this post were disabled by the author