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Wiseguy (1987 - 1990) 1x19 + The Flash 1x02 + The Missing (2014) 1x02 + Legends 1x08 Reviewed

Blood Dance
Mel is offered a deal with a Caribbean island in this episode directed by Kim Manners. There is an awkward meeting during which raw meat is eaten and a coup is plotted. Susan wears lots of jewellery and Mel rants about hypnosis, a spirit cult and the devil. Mel is entirely irrational and is being destroyed mentally. Roger and Vinnie have callousness and a gross lack of empathy. Vinnie finds his job a violating experience as he realises Roger is a CIA plant.

Mel rants about toes and this episode is ridiculous. Mel yells, gets a tattoo and there is loathing all round. Mel’s ‘soul crystal’ is stolen and without his power object his personality disintegrates. Roger and the CIA are done with Mel. It seems the whole Profitt arc was just leading up to the reveal of a CIA conspiracy. Roger is self congratulatory and smug. Mel has emotional needs, defensive condescension, self superior gloating and attention ploys.

Vinnie realises too late he is the victim of misinformation flaunting. There is a dead goat, a bad knife fight and there is no sane logical adult reasoning. This episode is like a narcissistic parody of the genre and it is filled with bad acting. Roger shows what an ass he is by smashing the ‘soul crystal’ in slow motion. Susan kills Mel at his insistence. The CIA wanted to gain control of the island all along. Susan gives Mel a Viking funeral. This was ridiculous, she would end up in the loony bin and the CIA would steal the Profitt company. After some good stuff, Mel Profitt goes out in ridiculous fashion.

Best Lines:
“Before my face is stuck to a voodoo doll!”

“I am a sane man!”

“We export sugar cane now.”

“Eventually they get rid of him.”

“I need 100 million dollars.”

“Global hatred.”

“Thanks for your help, I mean it sincerely.”

“Innocent? She’s a communist!”

“This is weird.”

“You had us kill him.”

“Shouldn’t you be out breaking somebody’s legs?”

“Smoke cigarettes after choir practice.”

“I can see the abyss.”

“Nothing’s forever...we always knew.”

“Who are these people?”

“Every tyrant has a hungry right hand.”

~
Fastest Man Alive
The Reverse-Flash killed Barry’s mother. But why? Barry smugs, Cisco is a snot and Snow is a joy killer. A scene from ‘Watchmen’ is ripped off. Barry steals and lies. There are flashbacks to little Barry (who can’t act) and how nobody would listen to him. Barry is the only CSI in Central City. Simon Stagg (William Sadler of ‘Star Trek: Deep Space Nine’) shows up to be evil. Eddie is attractive, Iris is oblivious and Snow whines. Joe nags and will this show get to doing ‘Crisis on Infinite Earths’ already?

Wells (Tom Cavanagh of ‘The Following’) smirks menacingly and is ambiguously evil. Joe is an ass. There is bad acting and the bad guy is a rip off of something out of ‘XMen: The Last Stand’. Iris can’t do her own college course work. Wells intervenes a lot. Cisco makes moron jokes. There is an overload of sap in this ep. Barry is nick named The Red Streak which sounds like a nasty UTI. Wells kills someone. Apart from the Wells scenes, this episode utterly and miserably failed.

Best Lines:
“People are going to die in there.”
“I know.”

“Her own spectacularly angry way.”

“Did Barry run away again?”

“Journalism is boring. I’m bored.”

“In science, we share.”

“He is missed.”

“I am an army!”

“An armed gunman is shooting up Stagg Industries.”

“The lightening man killed my mom!”

“Harrison. Don’t get up.”

“He’s just standing there.”

“He is called The Flash or at least, he will be one day.”

“I worry that you will think this is personal, it’s not.”

~
Pray For Me
This BBC1 drama centres on how young Oliver vanished in France in 2006 and how his family suffer the consequences in the present day. Drunk, divorced and friendless Tony (James Nesbitt of ‘Jekyll') obsessively searches for evidence with retired cop Baptiste. He’s regarded as mad by everyone. His ex wife Emily married Mark (Jason Flemyng) who was their police liaison officer in 2006 and dotes on her stepson. She also wears a bad wig in the present.

In 2006, a local perv named Bourg was suspected. A construction magnate named Ian put up a reward. A journalist named Suri aggravated things and a cop named Ziane (Said Taghmaoui of 'Vantage Point', Lost' and ‘GI Joe: Rise of Cobra’) had secrets. In the present, Tony wants to uncover the grotesque and terrible truth because it seems he was under suspicion. This was okay but full of coves. Nobody has any bonhomie for Tony. Will he be efficacious and learn the truth?

Best Lines:
“Am I going mad?”

“You pay now.”

“Oliver’s not here anymore.”

~
Iconoclast
The higher ups presuppose guilt. Martin tries to free an innocent woman from a set up. Crystal sulks. There is a cover up and oil rights are more important then the truth. DCO are on the line. Maggie uncovers that Martin’s entire life seems to be fabricated. Martin is in peril as are his family. This was dull. Who sold Martin out? Why is there a necessity to hide his real past?

Best Lines:
“I’m pissed off Nelson.”
“Good.”

“It tends to invalidate my credibility as a journalist.”

“I won’t let you burn for this.”

“This is the kind of story that ends governments.”
Tags: flash, legends, review, wiseguy
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