epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

Movie Reviews: The Beguiled + Ghost

The Beguiled (1971)
This gothic western horror is overlooked in Clint Eastwood’s oeuvre. During the American civil war, a wounded union solider (Eastwood) ends up taking refuge in a girls’ school in the confederacy. Cue bizarre voiceovers, mournful women and unending misery.

The arrival of this ‘mancandy’ in their put-upon exhausted lives arouses passions as the women fight over their pet thug. This leads to yelling, a sepia patina, depraved and rueful women and the solider makes the combustible situation worse.  There is scheming, counter-intuitive carry on, social upheaval, displacement, diminished lives, reinvention, un-felicitous girls done a disservice and this was dubious, rather irritating and intrinsically boring.

There is no ‘serious acting’ nor is it dark and troubled instead we get bulging eyed hectoring girls who spend a lot of time brooding on rooftops. The solider obfuscates truth and is coolly cerebral as he utters cosmic mumbling. When he finally slips up things get gruesome. Is it just revenge or just witless, abysmal and misbegotten.

Best Lines:
“You beast.”

“That smoke’s sure getting awful close.”

“The war is sounding so close.”

“It’s some time since the corporal had a bath.”
“I noticed.”

“A hussy is a hussy.”

“I should have let you die screaming.”

Ghost (1990)
Molly (Demi Moore) and Sam (Patrick Swayze) are a yuppie couple, he is a banker of some sort and she is an artist. They have their happiness scuppered when Sam dies. This is a wannabe frothy confection with vanishing pottery clay, dated SFX and outdated technology.

Sam and Molly’s ‘friend’ Carl (Tony Goldwyn of ‘Traces of Red’ and ‘Divergent’) is hot and evil. Sam is just a gurning dishrag. This has way too much overacting and wince-making sap. Sam wants to learn ghost-powers so he can beat up a member of the underclass and Carl. A medium, Oda Mae (Whoopi Goldberg), shows up to be incantatory and provide much unfunny comedy.

Carl is laundering money for drug dealers or something and wants Molly. Sam has a cunning plan to foil Carl. The supernatural proof Molly has to be convinced to let Oda Mae help her. The bad guys go crazy and die of their own incompetence and get dragged off to hell by demons. Sam heads off to heaven and this was absolutely awful. I think this was made into a flop musical.

Best Lines:
“You were never our friend.”

“You lying snake.”

“You’re going to be fertilizer.”
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