Crypto-fascist Tusk is obsessed with China. Walker is remarkably stupid. Underwood can convince people he’s signifying respect when he isn’t. Lucas stalks and berates as he seeks verification, his plotline is ridiculous. Janine has walked away from it all. Rachel has a new job and reaches out to her mother. Claire has an aesthetic vision. Stamper is losing his grip. Walker rants about Tusk’s superior mental acumen. Underwood gets medieval. This was banal.

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Underwood faces opposition and is platitudinous. Lucas hangs out with a hacker in scenes which are about as realistic as that old movie ‘Hardware’. There is a suspected anthrax attack. Underwood plots even whilst under quarantine. The intricacies of political craft are played out. People are beginning to see the vapours of hell on the charismatic sociopath Underwood. Nothing is insurmountable for the deliciously and unremittingly evil Underwood, which is name you can’t trust. There is a twist. Claire does a TV interview and sees an opportune moment. Underwood sings. This was more blandness.

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This opens on a weird sex fetish scene. There is a summit. Lucas isn’t appreciative of what people do for him. A poor guinea pig is menaced. The antithesis of order takes place amidst selfish disunion. Tusk runs Walker. Underwood is resilient. TPTB are putting out contrary plots this season. Underwood is loquacious. Lucas gets busted. Feng issues threats and Underwood extols.

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There is an energy crisis. Lucas thinks he is in a 1970s conspiracy thriller and will be vindicated. Claire plays Mrs Walker. Underwood and Meechum practice baseball. Rachel has found God. Remy and Jackie hook up. Lucas asks Tom to write an article on his theories which leads to Tom meeting Underwood. Janine bonds with her mother and then the FBI visit and she faces dictatorial threats. This was okay. There is a power cut during Underwood’s big moment. Tusk plays hardball. Janine saves herself. Stamper is a sad little man.

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A rich old biddy named Gloria dies and Henry knew her back in the day. Where is Adam? Henry interferes and emphasis is placed on how awful Gloria was. There was bad acting and I have no explanation to offer for how milquetoast and insufficient this show is. This was a total yawn.

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There is a flashback to Norway where a creepy nutter goes on about mousepox and makes cod-philosophical justifications. In the ‘present’, the Russians lurk and the creepy weirdo is on their ship. This episode was not aggressively original. Judgment is made on how various characters conduct their personal lives. Chandler continues being temperamentally erratic. The Russians are preening and joyless. This episode was half-arsed and squandered all promise. The perfunctory plot bores.

Chandler and Tex are stranded in open water and aren‘t freezing to death. Chandler is a martyr and has blinding moral rectitude. Quincy’s wife and snotty daughter show up. Rachel realises a Jamaican child is immune. The XO looms. Things get saccharine as Tex and Chandler share personal insight. The ‘cliff-hanger’ is strangely muted as the tired trope of US exceptionalism is subverted.

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This risible ep saw Naomi try to emote through her surgically altered face and there were hints as to where Tom could be. Liz is down in the mire and ooze and I hope this show hasn’t irrevocably palled. Things get intermittently violent as the baddie of the week furiously contests stuff. Naomi reveals she was in on whatever Red pulled. The baddie of the week does underground social psychology experiments on people with the warrior gene. Red is as ever unaccountable. People are played by a deranged doctor. Red has Naomi’s new husband’s mistress menaced. Liz goes undercover and uncovers extreme catfishing. A mystery shooter who may be the motel plant from 2x03 lurks. This was unsentimental tripe.

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