epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

Movie Reviews: Open Grave + Cutting Class

Open Grave (2013)
A man (Sharlto Copley) stares and realises he is in a mass grave and yells a lot. He climbs out and finds a house with a handful of people inside. Everyone has amnesia and this leads to swearing, yelling and everyone acting like aggressive morons. A mute woman writes illegible stuff. Food, clothes and guns have been stockpiled. This is about as mind-shredding as Sharon Stone’s old movie ‘Scissors’.

The gang explore and find dead people, a chained up woman, a camera, books in Latin and concealed cars. The man learns his name at the 41 minute mark and this is not scary and is populated by people with off putting moral superiority. That TV movie ‘Disappearance’ was way better than this mess.

A murderous man caught in barbed wire is found as is a ruin. The mute woman makes faces. A bratty kid shouts. The man has hazy memories and is chased by rampaging yellers. I felt utter indifference. This simplistic movie (filmed in Hungary) did not do it for me. Bitter grievances erupt amongst the strident fools. Sharon is the love interest. Lucas is crazy. Nathan is the other one. Mute woman is mute woman. They engage in fighting and incoherent carry on. There is bad dubbing and revelations.

The moral of this film is that when people get sucked into evil, it rarely occurs because of a dramatic binary choice. Or something. The dysfunctional bitter slackers carry on. This was worthless and not wrenching. It is jarring in its boredom. The plot is ‘resolved’ via exposition and a depressing ending.

Best Lines:
“We’re nowhere near a city.”
“How do you know?”

“No please I insist.”

“Someone is watching us.”

“We can’t bash the door in now.”

“You need me.”

“Is he dead?”
“I hope so.”

“I’ve been having some memories. Bad memories.”

“Death and madness everywhere.”

Cutting Class (1989)
Martin Mull of ‘Clue’ leads the cast in this unwanted slasher which is infernal fertilizer. A hot guy (Donovan Leitch) gets out of the nut house. People die improbably. The final girl (Jill Schoelen from ‘Popcorn’ and ‘The Stepfather’) is suspicious and full of meekness whilst her himbo boyfriend (Brad Pitt) does stupid things. Roddy McDowall is in here somewhere. A custodian lurks and this was just bad.

Best Line:
“What is this? Survival class?”
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