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Book Reviews: Justice + Moving Pictures

The Tainted Realm Book Three: Justice by Ian Irvine
Hightspall formerly known as Cythe is torn apart by war as various morons yell, scream, cry, lack dynamism and are unprecedentedly incompetent. Book 1 ‘Vengeance’ was good, Book 2 ‘Rebellion’ was unreadable and this curbs any attempt at enjoyment by being unanimously bad. This turns the saga from fantasy into sci-fi and apparently ties it into other books Irvine wrote which I haven’t read. Tali is subject to sexism and becomes a shame sponge. There is a massive exposition dump to end the novel, the war ends, a new ruler is chosen and a sequel is hinted at. No! This was all terrible, no more.

Best Lines:
“What foul sorcery are you up to?”

“Not being the contemplative type, she had never thought about the meaning or the value of their lives. Now she did, and did not like what she saw.”

“It allows perilous choices.”

“Syrten, who hasn’t had an independent thought in a thousand years?”

“They were criminals, banished to die in the void for an unforgivable crime.”

“There are worse worlds than this. Terrible worlds.”

~
Moving Pictures by Terry Pratchett
This 1990 10th Discworld novel is a tale of Hollywood coming to the Discworld via a tear in reality and Lovecraftian horrors lurking. This was okay if dull in places and not as plot dense as later books and the characterisation of various characters is vastly different to their portrayal in later books. The ‘hero’ and ‘heroine’ bore but this is a nice enjoyable parody of Hollywood and Lovecraft.

Best Lines
“Mattresses tend to be full of life too, and no-one writes odes to them.”

“It is a bit like Hell would be if they shut the fires off and stabled a herd of incontinent cows there for a year.”

“Singing a song with words in it that some of the older and more forgetful wizards had to look up.”

“Tshup Aklathep, Infernal Star Toad with A Million Young.”

“Someone who found employment anywhere people needed to be thrown very hard out of places for money.”

“Victor stared at the murky surface of the broth. Borgle worked on the principle that if you find it in water, it’s a fish. There was something purple in there and it had at least ten legs.”

“Prob’ly tentacled fings that rips your face off. I mean, when you finds mysterious doors in old hills, stands to reason wot comes out ain’t going to be pleased to see you.”

“If gharstely creatures from Before Dawna Time starts wavin’ at you from under your beds, jus’ you don’t come complainin’ to me.”

“As wicked a city as you could hope to find in a year of shore leaves, and seemed to have avoided any kind of supernatural vengeance, though it was always possible it had taken place and no-one had noticed.”

“Perhaps there was some ancient stone calendar, down there on the sea bed, among the lobsters.”

“They’ve got no idea of proper dignity!”

“Overhead the star’s changed.”
Tags: 2nd hand book store find, book review
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