epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

Star-Crossed 1x13 + In The Flesh 2x04 & 2x05 & 2x06 Reviewed

Passion Lends Them Power
The final ever ep but the plot movement in this yoofish mess has been so gradual that this show seldom inspired interest. Roman whispers, Emery is insipid and Drake and Taylor are clueless about their baby. The plot is grim and threadbare. Terri is on the revolving door of evil and good. Boredom is induced; no-one really cares about Grayson.

‘V’ and ‘Alien Nation’ are ripped off. Terri cries and ridiculous dialogue is uttered in this fathomlessly miserable mess of a show. Roman plays the vulnerable, despised and loathed woobie card so Emery will do it with him on the floor of a shed. The Trags are everywhere as they plot in tiny dark hovels. Roman has no dignity as it becomes clear his vaunted father kept a lot to himself. Gloria shames Taylor into keeping her unborn child. Emery is ever effusive and ebullient. There is bad acting and exposition.

Roman meets his hybrid half-brother. Emery is menaced. Grayson is totemic and gets shot. Zoë (who looks like she has hepatitis b) shows up to annoy and wipe out humans. The Trags don’t retract their behaviour. Everyone is stupid. Most of the male cast look like they’ve just been released from prison. Roman screws up. The ‘bomb’ turns out to be a signal beacon to a huge Atrian war fleet. The final scene proves that the evil all along Atrains deserved the systematic and prolonged campaign of intimidation and vilification. This was dull, the characters are all doomed.

Best Lines:
“I downloaded a Geiger counter app.”

“You’re the embodiment of everything that’s wrong with the human race.”

“Your little baby is an abomination.”

“This machine that looks like a vacuum cleaner but could bring an end to humanity or something.”

“Yay you.”

~
2x04
Philip has boring pervy thoughts about Amy. Henry’s annoying mother obsesses over her missing son. The odious Simon lectures and manipulates and wants to find the First Risen. Maxine Martin stipulates. Amy gets more annoying and won’t shut up. Simon does his emulation of emotion. Philip’s wig-gasms with PDS hos comes out after he can’t countenance any more of Maxine Martin’s actions.

Jem’s ridiculous sudden onset PDS accelerates. Amy has symptoms of something in-between shouting all her lines. It is never explained how the medication stops them rotting. Simon and Kieren make out some more, why? The plots are all over the place and detract from enjoyment. Simon’s ULA minions cause a rabid attack. Kieren turns into an ass due to the aggregating Simon. Why are we supposed to feel sorry for zombies who have no remorse or shame about killing and eating people? This was crap.

Best Lines:
“You’re so adept.”

“Rotter knocking shop.”

“I’ll tell what you do! I’ll tell everyone!”

“Are we like everyone else now?”

“I’m not a metaphor Brian.”

“With nothing but an electric toothbrush to defend myself with.”

~
2x05
Simon thinks Kieren is the First Risen and is told to kill him to trigger the second Rising. So we get a load of unwanted and unneeded Simon flashbacks about the conniving and pestering plot blight. Who cares about Simon? Kieren continues to act like a jerk, there is a massive disparity between his personality in series 1 and series 2 and he‘s alienated his family, again. The PDS continue to take their religion from the Undead Prophet and they think their condition bestows something special on them. Nothing modifies Amy’s behaviour. Why did TPTB turn the touching drama of series 1 into a crappy sub par soap opera in series 2? Simon’s formative flashbacks reveal he ate his mother and his father rejected him. Oh boo hoo. He doesn’t feel shame. He and Kieren are both selfish idiots. I suspect TPTB are trying to make Simon the new main character. This was crap. Who is the Undead Prophet?

Best Lines:
“We are the community and we have deemed you a threat to it.”

Saw that plot twist a mile off.”

“You rotten evil hag!”

~
2x06
There is no word on a 3rd series; even if it got one I’d skip it. But I hope this is axed like ‘Splash’. Kieren’s locked in his room for being a jackass. Amy is noxious and becoming human. Simon continues to spew his ULA crap. Dr Russo (Paul Warrier) is not what people think. Two government types lurk. Simon’s ULA mob plans a terrorist attack during the Beating of The Bounds march. Kieren lies and lies. Gary has depths and decides to put Kieren in his place. Nobody notices wanted ULA fugitive Simon walking around the village. The ULA scum scream about the second Rising and plan to attack. Kieren is dosed with Blue Oblivion. Maxine Martin’s plan is revealed as she rants. The PDS should all die, yet they get away with their crap and plan more crap. Kieren keeps causing trouble as he too becomes human. Government agents dig up a grave at the end. This was crap, I didn’t care. Series 1 was good but series 2 was camp crap.

Best Lines:
“What’s she doing with that toffee apple?”
“Eating it.”

“No living allowed on sacred ground.”

“Pulse beating scum.”

“Time to wake up little brother.”

“You are the First and the last.”
Tags: in the flesh, starcrossed
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