epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

True Blood 6x01 + Hannibal 2x05 + The Tomorrow People 1x22 Reviewed

Who Are You, Really?
People run from Bill in a flurry of bad acting. The much criticised Authority burns down. The governor institutes a curfew against vampires and seizes vampire owned businesses. This was all preventable. This show no longer bears any resemblance to the books. Pam whines and has no volition of her own. Jessica enjoys nothing better than whining and heads off to join Bill. Everyone swears copiously. The show is in a constant state of semi-darkness.

Jason rants about being brain-raped by vampires and has finally had enough of Sookie habitually choosing vampires. He has a hankering for revenge. Lilith shows up to walk around naked. Sam bores. The shifter plotline and three-way isn’t even minutely interesting. TPTB should have ousted Sam, Bill, Jessica, Tara and Sookie from the show long ago. Andy can’t cope with his spawn, cue self-abasement. The new PTB have no gift for show running only for self promotion.

Jason gets a lift from a creepy dude (Rutger Hauer). Sookie decides to be emboldened. There is consternation all round. Jessica and Bill are tersely annoying. A TruBlood executive (Tamlyn Tomita of ‘The Burning Zone’) shows up in a car with the licence plate TRUBLD1. The governor has a plan. Pam and Tara provoke a dispute. Eric bores. This show was demeaning and of minimal interest.

Best Lines:
“Flying over our heads like a naked evil Superman.”

“Buy a gun. Buy as many as you can.”

“Fish piss and sand in your cooch.”

“You keep taking their side over and over.”


“Your litter of alien babies!”

“Hog tits Arlene!”

“The kind with the bunny rabbit on the label.”

“I’ll slap the fangs out of your face.”

“Don’t stir this pot.”

“Evil vampire god monster thing.”

Hannibal wears a sweater. Jack plummets new depths of stupidity. Why isn’t the observatory closed after so many horrible things happening there? Freddie shows up to be disgusting. Beverly is dead and nobody notices that this buttresses Will’s defence. If any one of Will’s former colleagues had exerted themselves on his behalf it wouldn’t have happened. The FBI are lazy thickos and helping Will is not a priority for anyone. Nor is anyone prepared to help so Will devises a scheme involving Gideon (Eddie Izzard) but Gideon does not collaborate. The soundtrack sounds like someone loudly and repeatedly unloading a dishwasher. This ep was not a lament for Beverly, just stupid and annoying. Dr Chilton is malign. Freddie is gross. Will’s admirer reveals himself. Will used to have disinclination against violence. Now he decides to render unto Caesar so to speak. Alana and Jack are inviolably stupid and full of indignation. This was faded and full of disregard for logic.

Best Lines:
“Same killer. Two masks.”

“I’m a cutter not a pisser.”

“He very much wants to be you.”
“He should be more careful what he wishes for.”

“You built up something.”

“You were hiding in the FBI. That’s talent.”

“Get a job doing it when you get out. They may never know you were in.”

“I want you to kill Hannibal Lecter.”

“Slightly worrying.”

“I believe you and I are his only surviving psychiatrists. Pulled the tongues out of all the rest.”

Son Of Man
The Founder is evil and Roger was betrayed by the selfish TTP. Jedikiah has powers and then he doesn’t. He isn’t evil or is he? The sewer rat TTP are notoriously lazy and stupid. Stephen is instinctively dumb and can’t act. The Founder is a nut. Jedikiah and Roger have a cry and then Jedikiah shoots him dead. What were their parents thinking when they named them? Cara is a useless cold fish. No wonder this was cancelled. John is lazy and unpowered. He and Jedikiah have a chat. Is Jedikiah his daddy? Maybe. Uncommon valour is nowhere to be seen in this ep. Russell exacerbates his betrayal but gets away with it. Why do Roger and the Founder look so alike? Why is the lair undefended? Why does no-one admit that Jedikiah was absolutely right all along? Sap prevails.

There is a countdown to disaster. Russell whines and it is unclear what is going on. Jedikiah vanishes for 90% of the episode. Russell dispenses one liners. This ep is an indictment of how TPTB messed up. There is a broad daylight fight that no-one notices. TTP act like a gang of hoods. Astrid and John hook up. Everyone makes constipated faces and there is shouting and groaning and indiscriminately moronic actions. Stephen does ‘incensed’ and ‘lunging’, he can’t act even as he sends the Founder into limbo. Cara does ‘getting shot’ badly but Stephen rewinds time to save the inattentive twit. Any talent or imagination is suppressed by TPTB.

Jedikiah pops up to be resilient and offer John a syringe full of Roger’s DNA. John accepts. A new plan is implemented. New breakouts show up. Stephen is the new leader and takes over Ultra. Oh ha ha ha ha. Stephen and Cara hook up but is there something wrong with Cara? Jedikiah starts up a new organisation with John as his amnesic loyal sidekick. Also Jedikiah not only gave John his powers back but he also got John to finally comb his hair. More Jedikiah and less Stephen and Cara would have saved this show.

Best Lines:
“Roger’s blood is on your hands!”

“Last time we talked about this, you had me thrown in a rubber room.”

“The planet, as it should be.”

“I’ve made him immortal.”

“Your weird telepathy face.”

“What about Jedikiah?”
Tags: hannibal, review, true blood

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