epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: The Apparition + The Resident

The Apparition
This much derided horror flick has a spoilerific trailer and poster but it is a good if underappreciated horror. Idiot students hold a scientific experiment trying to prove ghosts are a mass iteration of channelled intentional belief. But it all goes horribly awry as the apparition nourishes and torments.

Kelly (Ashley Green) and Ben (Sebastian Stan of ‘Once Upon A Time’) live a bleak, down at heel life in LA. But something is menacing them. This is creepy as a sense of unease builds. The serial killer looking Ben is a liar who knows far more about the ‘mould’ infesting their home then he lets on. He and his unmoving face have ugly secrets. After Kelly has had it with the claw marks, mangled hangers, mouldy soap, murderous bed sheets, distortions of reality and disruptive entity, Ben’s old chum Patrick (Tom Felton) shows up to drop exposition dumps about apparition chambers, rifts, hallucinations, purgatory and exorcisms. Sadly for them, Patrick is utterly wrong on all levels. This was good and creepy with an abrupt bleak ending.

Best Lines:
“I guess I’m buying you a cactus.”

“Abandoned neighbourhoods, vacant strip malls, empty desert for miles in every direction. What girl doesn’t dream about that?”

“Why are the doors open?”
“I don’t know.”

“We’re attempting to contain and reap the entity we manifested a few years ago.”

“I’m not sure what we’ve done but something came through. We brought it into our world.”

“We should never have done this.”

“Our house is too new to be haunted. It has no history.”

“Your house isn’t haunted, you are.”

“It’s not the ghost of anything human.”

“The first séance acted as a beacon.”

The Resident (2011)
A Hammer Horror that stars the orange mannish looking Hilary Swank as an ER doctor who moves into the apartment complex owned by Jeffrey Dean Morgan (of 'Supernatural' and 'The Burning Zone') and his grandfather Christopher Lee. Somehow she misses the obvious aroma of nut whiff that lurks around them both.

She lives in the studied squalor of the raffish and shy Jeffrey Dean Morgan who tries to romance her. But he’s a wrong one and not because he is an irritating urban hipster who hosts pulled pork and whiskey sour parties. But it is hard to care as she is a smug entitled poseur liberal. This film was vexatious; it had a lot of baths, Christopher Lee doing his best eerie and detached, sweating, Jeffrey Dean Morgan doing crazy and Hilary Swank looking like a man. ‘Poison Ivy’, ‘Unlawful Entry’ and ‘Single White Female’ already did all of this in the 1990s. Still it could have been worse; I could have watched ‘Sex and the City 2’ instead.

Best Line:
“Are you loud?”
Tags: movie review, once upon a time, supernatural

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