‘Bitch Slap’ trailer
‘Delivery Man’ TV spot
‘Pacific Palisades’ Opening credits
Ginger biscuits = okay.
There will be no review of ‘Banshee’ 1x05 ‘The Kindred’.
I may review ‘Hostages’ and ‘Charlie Bartlett’.
Reviews of ‘Fearful Symmetries’, ‘Serpents in the Garden’, ‘Don’t Look Back’, ‘Plague World’, ‘Sparrow Hill Road’, ‘Cuckoo Song’ and ‘We Were Liars’ forthcoming.
“They collect wives like Happy Meal toys.”
“Saw what the Worthes actually are. Creepy meth heads and polygamists.”
‘The Growing Pains of Adrian Mole’ (book) Quotes:
“The dog on the other hand, had one of its mad fits, and had to be restrained with a rolled-up Guardian.”
“The best thing about the evening was the interval when Pandora played her viola in the refreshment room.”
‘The Simpsons’ Quotes:
“I spilled my pills.”
“Please don’t use that word in bed.”
“What if I homeschool?”
“Who here wants to touch radiation?”
“Every rap sheet has a first line.”
“That innocent fly flew from that fresh pile of dog faeces right into that monster’s mouth.”
“Are you dating this boy?”
“You two are the worst dressed gay men I’ve ever met.”
‘Hercules: The Legendary Journeys’ Quotes:
“That was a cow.”
“That’s right pretty boy.”
“It’s going to take us days of pain and crippling physical effort to get there.”
“You won’t be getting any sleep tonight.”
“It’s got that scary, don’t-look-under-the-bed kind of feel to it.”
“You tell me I’m wrong.”
“Am I dead? Again?”
“You let him go and I’ll stake you quickly.”
“Hercules versus a chicken?!?”
“I’ll change my ways I promise! I’ll only drink when I’m awake!”
“We’ll be combining corporate re-engineering techniques with ancient Navaho rituals to enhance the efficiency of your overall group dynamic.”
“We’re going to kill Herc’s little buddy Iolaus.”
“What a pity.”
“Hang in there buddy.”
“I’m presupposing that spirituality is unique to personifable deities.”
“My mistakes kill people.”
“I can’t think of any offhand but I’m sure they’re out there.”
“Play one round of naked leapfrog with you, please.”
“I gotta go find something that looks like Iolaus.”
“I’m here to wipe the floor with your face.”
“That is an entirely implausible plot development.”
Then came a season 1 ‘Xena Warrior Princess’ ep ‘The Black Wolf’ which had bad acting, endless fights scenes and Xena teaching people not to be haters. This ep floundered.
Then came the ‘Pilot’ ep of ‘The Burning Zone’. This show had bizarre CGI, great opening credits and starred Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Tamlyn Tomita. Marcase (Morgan) is a jerk and Shiroma (Tomita) doesn’t like him. Hailey is Defence Intelligence and Cassain is not in this ep. Paul Guilfoyle of ‘CSI’ and Peter Frechette guest star as the hosts of a sentient virus. A sealed tomb was opened allowing the sentient virus to escape. This show had weird religious overtones and bad acting but it had appeal. The virus tells Marcase how it sealed itself away to survive the Great Flood. Hailey is in peril, Shiroma uses ancient computer technology, a flamethrower is turned on Frechette’s character and the ending shows the virus is still out there. This show was axed and so much was never followed up on. This was good; will ‘Helix’ be like this?
“You’re that weird, uh?”
“A nightmare from hell.”
“We were very glad to see you. Humans are our natural hosts. Through you we express our consciousness.”
“We are god.”
“What I saw was fever-induced psychosis.”
“There’s a diagnosis straight out of the 13th century.”
“Which meant cleaning out the victims body cavities by hand!”
“The biological makeup of ancient oceans.”
“Now we are in you too.”
Finally there was a ‘Babylon 5’ ep ‘Atonement’ in which Zack is security chief, Delenn wears a bathrobe and emotes on the floor. Lennier is a tool. The idiot Sheridan/Delenn romance drags on. Delenn recalls her genocidal role in the Earth/Minbar war, I’m sure Sheridan is proud to be publicly loved up with a war criminal. Marcus and Franklin head to Mars. No-one gives a toss about Garibaldi. Delenn tantrums, to her nice is just a place in France. This reeked.