epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

Agents of S.H.I.E.L. D 1x07 + The Blacklist 1x07 + Nikita 3x15 Reviewed

The Hub
Coulson wiseasses, will he ever go away. Skye utters more silly remarks whilst looking like a drunken blowfish. The gang go the Hub where the plastic and empty Agent Victoria Hand (Saffron Burrows) does nothing. Ward and Fitz are sent on a mission. Fitz is a jerk, May continues to not emote and the po-faced ghoul Coulson blathers. Fitz is stupid, Coulson gets on his soap box and Ward talks too much. TPTB dangle more mystery about Skye in front of us, but I don’t care about her or what Coulson and May know. Coulson stomps around yelling about being Level 8 - oh shut up tool. This all thuds flat. Cancel this crap. This episode was awful and the show has the cultural resonance of a bar of soap. I don’t care about Fitz and Ward’s man-pain or the meth breath Skye. This show deserves to be lost under a veil of oblivion. What sort of dope smoking fiends are running this show?

Best Lines:
“Barton, Romanoff; they never have an extraction plan.”

“I just did that.”

“Some secrets are meant to stay secret.”

Frederick Barnes
Hipster Tom and Liz talk about remodelling their home, Tom is very forgiving of Liz believing him a monster. It seems no wordless worm of suspicion lurks in Liz’s heart. The desiccated toad Ressler annoys, a research scientist (Robert Sean Leonard) kills people and Raymond mocks a bad guy’s mooks and dares them to hold their guns all sideways at him. Ressler rages like a yeast infection, the bad guy wanders around plotting and Raymond buys his old house and blows it up in some awful CGI. What happened to his family? This wasn’t good.

Best Lines:
“The arteries in their face exploded.”

“Five-sided foxhole.”

“Face the truth of what he is.”

“I spend every day trying to forget what happened here.”

Alex is acting like the heir to the Zetrov throne. The cheap and tawdry Nikita is dumb, arrogant and annoying. She is also scarily stick thin. Ryan is dumb, Amanda annoys and Sean and Owen lurk. Birkhoff mutters and Division faces death thanks to the ridiculous POTUS. Division have seemingly opened the black box, Nikita is really annoying and she makes the wrong decision over and over and over again. This wasn’t good.

Best Lines:
“He made a mistake.”
“Not his first.”

“Even if caution doesn’t seem to fit with someone who assassinated a head of state in front of 500 witnesses.”
Tags: agents of shield, nikita, the blacklist

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