epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Elementary 1x08 + Alcatraz 1x07 + The Town 1x02 Reviewed

The Long Fuse

Watson tries to find the thankless Holmes a sponsor. A bomb takes out a lot of hipster web designers. Holmes has to solve the case as this show is like ‘Numb3rs’ where the investigators can’t do their jobs without an insufferable genius telling them what to do. Holmes solves the bombing, locates a body and reveals a sordid tale of sex, lies and videotape. This wasn’t good.

Best Lines:
“His fly is ¾ down. He doesn’t scream detail orientated.”

“Yellow cartoon sponge man...fat lady, new cookbook, insufferable.”

“I don’t know what you’re on but old me would definitely have wanted some.”

Johnny McKee

Lucy is still unresponsive and comatose. How did the 1960’s Alcatraz doctors end up in the present day, unaged and working for Hauser? McKee a mass murderer from 1960 gets a jobs as a barman and a pool boy so he can poison people. How does he have such a handy collection of poisons?

Flashbacks to 1960 show McKee dealing with a prison bully and Lucy doing shady things. This was okay but so much makes no sense. Where did McKee get his equipment? How did he get onto the subway and know how to operate it? What will become of the 63s?

Best Lines:
“You don’t want to say no to me.”

“It’s a killing jar with people.”

“He was poisoned. I wonder who could have managed such a feat in a room of 40 people.”

“Till I my long laborious work complete.”

The Town 1x02

Jodie ditches Harry for a chav at her school Mark gets a job at the council and as a result finds out something about his dead mother he didn’t want to know. Shirren, Mayor Len’s sidekick is unhelpful. Mark yells at the lying local copper Chris. Alice is hired of her yobbish husband Karl and shags Mark. Jodie goes full chav. Betty gets a job as a chamber maid. Len covers stuff up. The florists have a falling out.

There is talk of a missing photo and mysterious flowers. Mark, Betty and Jodie have a yelling match about family secrets. Mark really was oblivious to the myriad of problems his family had. Jodie sluts it up and Mark calling her a mistake and going back on his word to take care of his family didn’t help. Mark is a selfish bad seed who manages to get fired, arrested and hurl his parents ashes into peoples faces all in a short period of time. This was good.

Best Lines:
“You look really stupid.”
“Piss off.”

“It’s like having a wife I can’t divorce.”

“Where are you going?”
“Where does it look like?”
“Jeremy Kyle.”
Tags: alcatraz, elementary, the town

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