epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Mission Impossible (1988 - 1990) Review, part 3

The Haunting
A rich boy named Champ (Parker Stevenson) is a suspected serial killer. The IMF must take him down. Casey can’t act, Nicholas wears an eye watering shirt and ugly acid washed jeans, Max dresses like a loon, Phelps pretends to be a psychic and there is a flurry of bad acting. There is a séance and Champ digs his own grave. This was dull.

Best Line:
“He’s kind of dead.”

The Lions
A kingdom awaits its new King. The crown prince is being sabotaged by his evil uncle Ki. The crown prince’s mother is an idiot. This is lazy & contrived with no realism or three dimensional characters or believable dialogue. Ki doesn’t have the decency to have a gullet choked with shame but the two bit hood gets his. This was awful with bad acting.

The Greek
The latest lowlife targeted by the IMF is a Greek tycoon who smuggles stolen medical supplies. This bored. Casey does nothing. The Greek tycoon has a blowsy opera singer mistress. There is more bad acting, bad security and a matte painting of the Greek countryside with unmoving clouds. Grant hides in someone’s bubble bath and the IMF provoke a shootout. This was sub-juvenile tosh.

Best Lines:
“Damn Greek booze.”

“Drugs of addiction.”

“It would be hard not to demise with your head in a cement block on the bottom of the ocean.”

“It’s going to make me rich.”
“It might just make you very dead.”

The Fortune
Casey is captured, killed and disavowed. An Imelda Marcos type wife of an ousted dictator wants to go home. Her husband is gaga and she’s a loon. The duo have asylum in the USA but they looted their country’s treasury and the IMF have to steal the money back. The dictator’s wife likes gigolos so Max plays the part. Nicholas wears sunglasses with a computer uplink as later seen in ‘Mission Impossible 2’. The dictator’s wife wears trashy heels. Shannon Reed (Jane Badler of ‘V’) debuts. This was okay, the IMF team wants justice for Casey - but how can they do that as she’s been disavowed?

The Fixer
A columnist named Arthur Six blackmails people. The IMF must stop him. Casey has been forgotten, the opening credits have been altered and the IMF plan to have Six vilified, disgraced and denounced as a corruptor. There is a lot of faxing. Nicholas gets fake shot yet again. A public confession is engineered. This was dull.
Tags: mission impossible, v(1983/2009)

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