epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

Nikita 2x13 + Once Upon A Time 1x03 + Game of Thrones 1x04 + Doctor Who 7x05 Reviewed

Clean Sweep

Sean is a prat, Oversight are morons, Gogol do boring stuff, Alex returns to Division and Percy and Roan leave. Michael and Percy meet for the first time since season 1. Percy immediately begins sowing the seeds of distrust by bringing up Daniel, kill orders and Owen.

Oversight go down, Gogol run around in conspicuous black trench coats and things change. Amanda has a secret. But this was a bad ep.

Best Lines:
“Anyone else got a salient point they’d like to share?”

“Right now Roan is my prime suspect.”
“That would be a good guess.”

“Oh no that’s not good.”

“Holy crap you’re alive! I though the terminator got you.”


~
Snow Falls

This dreadful episode was all about Prince Charming/Snow White’s meet cute and their non cute re-meet in their Storybrooke reiterations. Snow White was once a thief now as Mary Margaret she wears a lot of modest soft pastels. Dr Whale (David Anders of ‘Heroes’, ‘The Vampire Diaries’ and ‘Alias’) looks unwashed and is another thrall of Regina’s.

Henry continues to be a wilfully obtuse mush mouth. Regina is tedious and OTT hostile. Prince Charming was an arrogant git and now he is unconscious and then he is conscious. There is irritating dialogue, trolls and the Evil Queen’s soldiers wear ridiculous uniforms. This was beyond terrible. Dr Whale irritates, Emma stomps around and David (the one time Prince Charming) turns out to have a wife who the ridiculous Regina probably built in the basement or something.

~
Cripples, Bastards and Broken Things

The Night’s Watch are unpleasant, the Starks are idiots and the ‘imp’ is witty. It is like a whole country of children of the corn. The bridal party arrives at the city of the Horse Lords and Viserys continues to be a moron. There is dragon mythology. There are various creepy guys.

Sansa continues to be a spoilt moron. Ned looks into his predecessor’s death. A fat boy joins the Night’s Watch. King’s Landing is full of spies. Littlefinger does nothing of interest. King Robert has a bastard son. The glorified doorman Jamie is an idiot. This bored.

The Queen and her hair extensions lurks, Sir Hugh is a snot, King Robert is a joke and Lady Stark is stupid.

Best Lines:
“The breath of the greatest dragon forged the iron throne which the usurper is keeping warm for me. The swords of the vanquished. A thousand of them melted together like so many candles.”

“The next time you raise a hand to me will be the last time you have hands.”

“My brother will never take back the Seven Kingdoms. He couldn’t lead an army even if my husband gave him one.”

“Start the damned joust before I piss myself.”

“Enough of the bloody pomp. Have at it.”


~
The Angels Take Manhattan

This was appalling. It had a ridiculous intro and don’t get me started on the Statue of Liberty being a Weeping Angel. I thought the nadir of new Doctor who was the human Dalek ep. But no, the nadir was thing piece of crud. Amy, Rory and the Doctor hang out in NY. The non-scary Weeping Angels lurk. They haven’t been scary since ‘Blink’.

River Song shows up to be an annoying cougar, Rory is sent back to 1938 and Amy is unconcerned. The Doctor is useless and needs to shut up and there is not one but two cop out endings. There is over acting and over melodramatic chords, unnecessary slow motion, River has a non reaction to it all and this was terrible. What about Amy and Rory’s family and friends?

Best Lines:
“That’s an awful lot of locks for one door.”

“There’s a car out front. Shall we steal it?”

“You think you’ll just come back to life?”
“When don’t I?”
Tags: doctor who, game of thrones, heroes, nikita, once upon a time, the vampire diaries
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