Assignment Five

Episode 1
A posh family are having a 1930 themed party. Various noxious guests show up. Steel and Sapphire gatecrash pretending to be Miles and Virginia Cavendish. Steel’s hair is slicked back and he sports a porntasche. Besides that he is as detached and irascible as ever As the party goes on, it really seems to be 1930. This was intriguing and very good.

Best Line:
“52 years old, totally repressed personality.”

~
Episode 2
A guest named Tony shows up in tight white trousers, his gal pal Veronica wears a vile coral and pink dress. George who has been dead for 50 years joins the party, no-one seems that surprised. There is annoying fake crying. The guests play sardines and someone is found dead. This was good.

Best Lines:
“She’s 24. Very much in love, not very bright.”

“It probably knows about us.”
“It always does.”

~
Episode 3
There’s no way out of the house which is on a ley line. Someone or something is turning back time. There are dramatic chords. Sapphire and Steel sort of figure out what is going on. If George hadn’t died 50 years ago, he would have wiped out humanity like what happened in ‘Survivors’. The guests are served jugged hare for dinner. I don’t know what that is nor do I care to. Steel’s complete ignorance of human etiquette and social conventions is displayed. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“He will cause the extinction of life on this planet by his carelessness.”

“Nobody takes guns into dining rooms.”

~
Episode 4
What are Sapphire and Steel? One is a non-elemental gemstone and the other is an alloy, apart from that, we know nothing. Someone in the house had a predatory leaning. The rest think Miles/Steel has a severe personality disorder. Sapphire tries to stab herself but Steel puts his hand in the way. Instead of him getting stabbed in the hand (like David McCallum’s character did in my favourite ‘NCIS’ ep ‘Broken Bird’), the blade breaks.

Then Sapphire points a gun at Steel. But it all works out as Steel fixes the knife and he and Sapphire almost kiss or something. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“Not necessarily in love, he was using her.”
“There’s a difference?”
“On this planet, yes.”

“I’m not sorry about this.”

“I’m afraid he’s a bit dead.”

~
Episode 5
Annabelle demands that Miles/Steel do a ‘Poirot’ and solve the mystery. Then she dies. Sapphire and Steel recruit Felix to help them. They give him the codename Brass and share Sapphire’s telepathy with him. Felix is not the least freaked out that Sapphire and Steel are not of this universe. George is an idiot, Steel can work a computer by waving his hand at it and someone else dies. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“You’re asking me to believe that you’re a kind of interplanetary police force?”
“Yes.”
“Aliens of some sort?”
“In an extra terrestrial sense yes.”

~
Episode 6
George shows that he was an idiot annoying ignoramus who deserved his fate. The villain turns out to be the person sporting blue eye shadow and a loo brush haircut. The events of 1930 have been set in motion once again. George nearly gets murdered on multiple occasions.

Sapphire and Steel say time is their enemy. The baddie lowers themself admirably to the occasion. The party begins again. This was okay. Sapphire and Steel stand very still and stare directly into the camera. This was okay.

Best Line:
“What have you been promised?"