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Smallville 10x22 Reviewed

Finale, Part 2

The final ever ep, finally. I used to love this show back in the day. Up until season 3 and then TPTB lost me as fan. The wilful destruction of the clex, Clark being a jerk and too much bloody Lana fraking Lang.

This ep had way too much Tess and Lionel. Darkseid underwhelms, well this show did manage to screw up Doomsday so no change there. Lionel suddenly cares about Lex. There is no mention of Lex’s half brother as seen in season 2 and Tom Welling still can’t fraking emote.

Lex is back from the dead. When did the Luthor mansion burn down and get replaced with a bad cgi model? Clark and Lex reunite after years and Clark is still accusing. WTF is Lex babbling about? Why is Clark such an ass? Why can’t he be nice? He never even tried to save Lex.

Green Arrow and his idiot Christian Bale voice shows up to annoy. Lois is a star reporter, how did that happen? TPTB just will not stop shoe horning Lionel into every scene. Clark sees clips from past eps, the Clark/Lex friendship has been completely expunged of course.

Lex kills Tess, about time someone did. She gives him amnesia, WTF? Stupid scene. Did Lex really forget Clark? Though considering the damage Clark did to him, maybe that’s for the best. In a very nice moment the LuthorCorp sign is damaged and now reads LX Corp. Nice.

It takes Clark ages to do something about Darkseid’s Apokolips. His superman suit is encased in plastic ice and it’s the ugly suit from the dreadful ‘Superman Returns’. Everyone calls Clark a hero, despite the fact he’s done nothing heroic lately. Bloody Jonathan Kent and his fraking platitudes makes one last appearance.

Clark poses while not emoting and all we see of Clark in the suit is a CGI blur. This is probably because the suit didn’t fit him. This all turns out to be a comic Chloe was reading to her son (presumably Green Arrow is the absentee father). The comic plotpoint makes no sense. Is Superman’s ID public knowledge? Who wrote the comic? And how did Clark defeat Apokolips? He just flies up in the sky and then Apokolips just goes away. WTF?

It’s now 2018 and Clark still hasn’t married Lois. Perry White is heard yelling off screen, Jimmy Olsen shows up dressed like a dodgy stripper and Lex has just been elected President. Okay so I guess the amnesia either didn’t work or made him good thus rendering Lex’s entire plot arc of misery/parental abuse/evil wives/being abandoned and bullied by all his friends worthless.

Where are Kara and the JSA? When did Clark get a love of waistcoats? I think someone fancied John Barrowman in season 1 ‘Torchwood’. The ‘Superman’ theme blares and Clark slow-mo’s into a dramatic shirt rip to show off his ill fitting suit. I never thought I’d say this but Brandon Routh was a better Superman (the bullet to the eye and the plane rescue were the sole highlights of the awful ‘Superman Returns’)

So it’s over, it had some good parts and some crap parts. Lex still hasn’t got an apology from Clark. Lionel and Tess are finally dead. No Lana and lots of plot illogic. That’s our ‘Smallville’.



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