epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

Movie Review: The Musketeer (2001)

Well, that was a bit rotten wasn't it?

D'Artagnan, who is a real smug snot, acts like a jerk, gets people killed and then 'saves the day'. He can fight in Hong Kong stunt fashion but he can't pronounce his own name properly. Seriously he needed a good kicking.  Aramis, Porthos and Athos show up and are so bland, I couldn't tell which was which.

The climatic ladder fight scene was already done in a season 2 episode of 'Xena: Warrior Princess' and don't even get me started on the Tim Roth character's dead body suddenly moving several feet without explanation.

The fight scenes were good. Tim Roth hams it up as the panto boo!hiss! baddie. Stephen Rea sleepwalks through his role. Mena Suvari is the spunky!girl. Kid D'Artagnan has a cut glass English accent for some reason. Nobody displays any courtly manners or respect to anyone.

It's watchable but not good. seriously what was up with Stephen Rea in this film? Did they have sewers in the 1600's? Why was the colour scheme so red? I thought my tv was out of wack in parts because everything was so red.
Tags: movie review, musketeers

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