epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

True Blood 3x11 + 3x12 Reviewed

Fresh Blood
Bill annoys and Sookie is stupid, nothing new there. Jesus likes tripping on V. Lafayette hallucinates. Crystal is a werepanther. Jason is dumb, Jessica needs to be staked and Hoyt's an idiot. Did TPTB borrow the 'daywalking' phrase from 'Blade'?

Sam acts crazy, Hoyt's momma plots and a local football player is V crazy. Tara is annoying, Tommy is whiny trash, Holly and Arlene do magic. Russell grandstands. Why do none of the vampires care about the existence of Jason, Hadley and Hunter? Will Sookie ever just shut up? This was boring, I cannot stand much more of Bill being a twit.

Best Lines:
"I told you I had secrets. You said you didn't care."
"I thought it was shoplifting or something."

Evil Is Going On
Eric has a vision of his idiot maker. Bill's a twit, again. Nan lies. Sam tells Tara his secret. Russell is extra crispy. The DEA are foiled by Jason Stackhouse. Sookie pours Talbot's remains down the drain and laughs. Jason is dumb.

Talbot was the love of Russell's life? Talbot the guy who apparently never left the house and threw tantrums? Then again Russell probably loved being in complete control of the 'love of his life'.

There's a change of leadership in Hot Shot. Alcide shows up. Sookie is "vampire crack", explains a lot as her personality is sure not attractive. Jesus is a witch. Russell is taken care of. Bill tries to take care of Eric and fails. Hoyt's momma gets a gun.

Bill lies some more to dumb stupid Sookie until Eric finally reveals just what scum Bill really is. Sookie knows the truth, finally and screams. Tara drives off, Sam may have shot Tommy, Sophie-Anne shows up to have an idiot 'Matrix' fight with Bill. This was okay but this show is nothing but a backwater hick soap opera now.

Best Lines:
"All I wanted was a couple of goats for my wolves."
"You slaughtered my entire family for a couple of goats?"

"There you go Uncle Daddy Calvin."

"This what you made."

"You're a witch whose a nurse whose a dude."
Tags: true blood

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