epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: The Columnist+The Last House On The Left (2009)+Tremors 4: The Legend Begins+ 1 more

The Columnist (2019)

This Dutch drama stars Katja Herbers of 'Evil'. This is subtitled and sees Femke get trolled and she gets murderously confrontational in response. This wasn't that interesting.

The Last House On The Left (2009)

This remake nobody asked for sees criminals (among them Aaron Paul of 'Breaking Bad') bother teenage girls. Then they end up at the holiday home of one of their victims. This wants to gritty, graphic and edgy but it just tasteless sleaze. This is full of gore and is void of quality or logic. This was murky, underlit and unwatchable. Josh Cox of 'Babylon 5' features in this really quite medicore film. Even Tony Goldwyn as the avening dad can't make you watch this.

Tremors 4: The Legend Begins (2004)

This prequel is set in 1889. I didn't like the original and have not seen 2 or 3. Billy Drago is in this. This was not totemic, it was beyond average and more than tedious. This has bad ADR and is just bad.

Best Lines:

“Our Alamo!”

“Juan, we were the losers at the Alamo.”

“Speak for yourself gringo.”

The Rythm Section (2020)

Grief is an isolating burden for a woman in this idiot film. Blake Lively and Jude Law star. She does an English accent and is a drug addled grief raddled hooker. This was mendacious. It is 3 years since her parents, sister and brother all died in a plane crash caused by a bomb.

Good behaviour is not expected or demanded of her. She looks like she needs a good wash. We get it! She's sad! There are inclandestine actions and rants about a cover up and no palpable fear or plot or logic. There is death and she is trained.

There is exposition in this deplorable film that is downright daft and it has no narrative richness. The grimness of the situation goes on. There is violence and chaos and selfish and petulant people. This was a cesspit and extraneous. This was blah, blah, blah.

Best Lines:

“It's not worth it.”

“You'll still be you.”

“This isn't a reasonable business.”

Tags: babylon 5, breaking bad, evil(cbs), movie review, sarah connor chronicles

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