March 6th, 2020

Pretty Smart

Black Widow Prelude Issue 2 Reviewed

I didn't miss this after all. There is a Betty Ross mention. This a summation of the movies. Ross lurks and wants to find Black Widow. The dreadful Bruce/Natasha hookup is mentioned. We learn why people are hunting her. This was okay.

Best Lines:

“I can't believe the sentences coming out of my mouth nowadays. Didn't the world used to be sane?”

“We're facing a potential global catastrophe.”

“Well, those I really try to avoid.”

“I don't threaten councilwoman. I do or I do not.”

  • Current Music
    Gaslighter – Dixie Chicks/Don't Go Breaking My Heart – Elton John
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Movie Reviews: Blockers + Journey To The Far Side Of The Sun + My Friend Dahmer 🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔

Blockers (2018)

John Cena and Leslie Mann v teenagers who want to get it on in this comedy. It's prom night and various teens plan on doing it. Cena and his stone face chews on a thong. There are attempted voices of reason. Miles Robbins is in this.

Parents see their 3 daughters as villainously irresponsible. One daughters gets into UCLA and one daughter is a fan of 'Xena Warrior Princess' and 'Snow White And The Huntress' to signal where her interests lie. The 3 parents have ideological zeal to stop their daughters doing it.

The 3 parents believe that teen goings on are capable of doing serious damage. But will it inevitably have negative consequences? Or is it a freely chosen activity? This was okay and doesn't fail utterly. The parents can't be urbane and sophisticated. One dad has grotesque misrule and is wholly unprepared psychologically. This was flimsy as the hyped up parents freak out.

Cena (a pro wrestler turned actor) has a face like petrified wood. This doesn't really contribute much. There is no serious thought out consideration of anything. A smother inflicts serious harm. The teens reinforce suspicion. A limo driver is creepy and logic and reason are soundly ignored. This seems intended to be funny.

Parents freak out over emojis and an ex caused unexamined trauma. There is no dignity. This wasn't even that interesting and was not structurally daring. There is creaky narrative machinery. This was a bit deadeningly suffocatingly dull. Cena is stone faced and intimidates and frightens and wears unfortunate shorts. There are resolute disputes and puke and beer. This was not necessary as people acted relentlessly stupid.

Best Lines:

“Dirty stripper underwear!”

“All candles get me horny.”

“They're not for looking at. They're for using. Like plungers.”

“You never stay friends with people from high school. The oldest friend I have is Jan from work and I've known her for 3 months.”

“Sad and reflective.”

“Bedrock of deep, meaningful friendships.”

“Tell you not to do this stuff.”

“Give me a call.”

“I've been calling you.”

“I saw this in the romantic comedy 'American Beauty'.”

“Life ruining decision.”

“Ass beer.”

“Graduation's for losers!”

“I refuse to believe she couldn't do better than that loser!”

“Crackers that she steals from restaurants.”

“Look at the drool coming out of that smiley face!”

“You look like a youth minister.”

“Breath through it and accept it.”

“What would Vin Diesel do?”

“Butt chug.”

“You're not Schwarzenegger!!!”

“Weirdoes whose parents dragged them out of prom.”

“Don't you want to see him breakdance and probably hurt himself?”


“We got to all of the marches!”

“I don't need any more dead girls on my conscience!”

“Took like 6 years to graduate.”

“I remember him. He got to miss school when his kid was born.”

Journey To The Far Side Of The Sun (1969)

Roy Thinnes stars. There is a doppelganger of Earth on the far side of the sun. There is wife beating and the doppelganger Earth is exactly like Earth. The wife beating astronaut doesn't know which world he is on. This had potential but was dull.

My Friend Dahmer (2017)

The 70s childhood of the serial killer. Every adult who could have taken Dahmer off his dark path didn't. This was very terrible.

Best Line:

“We eat our mistakes.”

  • Current Music
    Bad Guy – Billie Eilish/Can't Fight The Moonlight – Leann Rimes
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Scary Books

Star Trek Voyager 6x08&6x07 Reviewed

One Small Step

Phil Morris of 'Smallville' and the 80s 'Mission Impossible') plays the ill fated pilot of the Ares IV Mars Mission of 2032. His ship ended up in the Delta Quadrant. Did this ep inspire 'The Martian'? There are dated VFX. Watching this left one wondering what the hell these people were doing with their lives. This was an unappealing extreme disappointment. The doctor and Janeway continue their remorseless campaign to annoy. This was cheap looking and profoundly offesively stupid.

Dragon's Teeth

This guest stars Robert Knepper of 'Prison Break'!!! Rubber faced aliens show up. The crew find a planet that 892 years ago was orbitally bombarded to rubble. This was cheap looking and full of dated VFX. The crew land the ship in the radioactive city rubble because reasons. This set up potential plot arcs that were never followed up on. The race on the planet caused lasting adverse opinion. The Borg were around 892 years ago. Janeway has no hazard perception.

Janeway is not hyper aware of potential threats. The new race are an evil threat and want to make a reassertion of their power. 7 of 9 woke the race not knowing or anticipating the consequences. The race were notorious for their evil actions even among Neelix's race. How is a satellite still working after nearly 900 years?

The race have a bleak intimidating aspect and create havoc and Janeway never reckons with the consequences. This was okay if not riveting. The race have viciousness and Janeway is disappointingly platitudinous. No one finds the new race deeply concering, at first. There is talk of inherited hatreds and perpetual discord.

Naomi dosen't like the new race. To think that TPTB thought that Neelix would be the breakout character. The new race were remorselessly brutal. There is bad make up and the race are thankless. People babble about subspace corridors. The new race look like Cardassians – nobody comments on that. They're hostile and oppressive. Janeway always has a need for drama.

The new race's planet being wiped out isn't an incredibly traumatic experience. This ends in a moronic inferno. Janeway has learnt incompetence. Mimi Craven and Ron Fassler costar.

Best Lines:

“I doubt it's inhabited anymore.”

“They could be hostile.”

“Most humanoid cultures are.”

“Made our final stand there.”

“Plasma bombs are something else.”


“Deadly stranger.”

“Focus on the assault fighters.”

“That was his battle cry.”

“The demon with the golden voice.”

“Plans for conquest are irrelevant.”

“Nothing to negiotate with.”

“Take back what was ours.”

“Our former colonies are destroyed or were occupied by species that are far more advanced than we are!”

“Then we'll find a way to take them back.”

“We have gone from a population of 6 billion to 600!”


Trailers, Quotes & Stuff

'Flatliners' promo

The 90s classic.

'The Crown' opening credits

Jared Harris as George VI.

'Batwoman' trailer

Where are the Robins? Gabriel Mann!!!

Best Lines:

“Batman gave up on us.”

“A hero that isn't here.”

'Why Don't You Just Die!' trailer

Russian horror. No.

'The Other Lamb' trailer

Oh creepy with a cult.

'Star Trek Picard' 1x08 promo

“Hell will come again.”

'Antebellum' trailer


Why was Batman never arrested for turning teens into vigilnates? Even in the 1966 tv show?

So they've delayed the release of the new Bond film to November.

The Eyecicle is a thing.

'Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist' = bizarre.

My voice rarely seems to be heard.

Who read 'I Read The News Today, Oh Boy The Short And Gilded Life Of Tara Browne'?

I want a woven bamboo laundry basket and a sculpted rose cushion and I want a Esme saddle bag and a Nicola small shoulder bag and small stone heart earrings. I want a Viesbeth silk dress and a Varno floral skirt and a pink camera bag. I want a stainless steel, ceramic and diamond Serpenti Bvlgari wristwatch.

What is solar wind?

I had no warning about who my ex was.

I won't read 'The Wives'.

'The Stone Dogs' Quotes:

“It still sounds like rights to me,”

“Dominatin' their wills with ours.”

“As arbitrary as the fall of comets,”

“Homesick for a country that no longer exists...”

“In a generation or two, the only people left on earth who speak French will be serfs.”

“Implausible lingerie.”

“To the Draka, there would be no peace until they ruled the human universe.”

“The bridge-dam-city across the straits of Gibraltar.”

“Sheer despair.”

“The memory of past freedoms faded,”

'RTE News' Quotes:

“Share his reflections.”

“Mistake never to be repeated.”

'Sky News' Quote:

“Up to the company to be more successful.”

'The Gloss Magazine' Quotes:

“Customers were prevented form entering her shop but could peer in the windows.”

“Dog nannies.”

“Aware of everything spoken in its presence.”

“Flying roses from Colombia,”

“Previously closed archives.”

“Placed against her will.”

“Many people did not like him,”

'Apollo 11' Quotes:

“We came in peace for all mankind.”

“Not since Adam has any human known such solitude.”

'The Irish Times' Quotes:

“Obedience to the traffic laws is not the Dublin motorist's strong point.”

“Saucy boys,”

“Soon be challenging people to make a meal with “whatever you can scavenge from the forbidden zone” or simply “what's left of Alan”?”

“Trap quesiton.”

“Cough etiquette.”

“Normally mild-mannered.”

“”Yes,” they both replied, unashamedly,””

“Carry the shame.”

“Manipulate distrust to their favour.”


“Questions on this are not tolerated.”

“Mocked or complained about this.”

“Can you bring the cows back please?”

“They're looking at cows.”

“Potentially unprecedented health situation.”

“Just let future events take their course.”

“Had a poor reputation.”

“Hostile element.”

'The Crown' Quotes:

“Do shut up.”

“Never again be able to leave her rooms.”

“Alas no sir.”

“Some things can never be forgotten.”

“No, never.”

“I will take a lecture on national embarrssment from many people, sir. But not from you.”

“What a vile tawdry rabble my relatives are.”

“You had a chance to serve this country.”

“I alas not.”

“Full horrors were yet to come.”

“Threw me out.”

“Cruel chatter.”

“No possibility of my forgiving you.”

'BBC News' Quote:

“Self isolating in his caravan.”

'The Big Bang Theory' Quote:

“I walked on the moon. What have you done?”

'Channel 4 News' Quotes:


“No country wants them.”

“No reason to surrender.”

'48 Hours' Quotes:

“Living in a drainage tunnel.”

“Someone was admitting it.”