September 27th, 2019


Trailer, Quotes & Stuff

'Countdown' trailer

App horror. Looks okay.

Best Line:

“I've read about it. A lot.”

I've profound disappointment in my ex. I made the great mistake of placing faith in my ex. I've a profound sense of loneliness.

Huntress from 'Birds Of Prey' to be in 'Crisis'!

It's 15 years since 'Lost'!

'Dr Phil' Quote:

“They don't want me there.”

'England's Forgotten Queen' Quotes:

“Historical superstars.”

“The wronged princess.”

“Decide the identity of England's queen.”

“Secretly changed the sucession.”

“Grandad's old armour from Bosworth.”

“Local yokel.”

“Active rebellion.”

“Not very impressive forces.”

“Royal favour to profound regret.”

“Token of hope.”

“Undid what all England considered the natural order.”

“Blood claim to the throne.”

“General Warden of the North.”

“Show of defiance.”

“Champion of the old ways.”

“Nasty style of fighting.”

“Cheering he expects doesn't come.”

“Backing the wrong queen.”

“Standing in the way of the rightful successor.”

“A queen becomes a prisoner.”

“Dangerously isolated.”

'BBC News' Quotes:

“Incapable of reaching agreement on anything.”

“Knowing no shame.”

“Thought out strategy.”

'Sky News' Quotes:

“They simply do not care.”

“Damning document.”

“Unleash his charms.”

“Calm themselves.”

“Dispatch his own deputy.”

“Stop interupting me for a second.”

'The Irish Times' Quotes:

“They, and their opinions, are now treated with barely concealed contempt by their self-appointed betters.”

“The prestige release.”

“Twitter is always ready to burst a blood vessel at the eradication of this character or the rerouting of that plotline.”

“Didn't conform to the demands of a society with a strict moral code.”

“Like a lighthouse in a bog, brilliant but useless.”

“Police our emotions or bully us out of public life.”

“Working against me for years.”

“Deserved respect.”

“Violated our dignity.”

“Beyond embarrassment.”

“The strontium you measure is your childhood strontium which is locked into your teeth and doesn't change – like a time capsule,”

“Operation Purge.”

“Trying to reason.”

'Hollyoaks' Quotes:


“Not that you deserve anyone's forgiveness.”

“Don't deserve forgiveness.”

'Midsomer Murders' Quotes:

“We only meet when there's a corpse.”

“Insincere expressions of regret.”

“Begged for love.”

'Channel 4 News' Quotes:

“Chicanery afoot.”

“Shrill ructions.”

'Frayed' Quotes:

“You fat moron!”

“Sell the yacht. The bigger one.”

“I wish I missed him.”

Scary Books

Book Reviews: The Second Sleep + The Best Horror Of The Year Volume Eleven part 1 🩸💔💀😦

The Second Sleep by Robert Harris

From the author of 'Fatherland' comes this very good post-apoc tale. Humanity has reverted to pre-industrial wretched circumstances 1000 years after the unexplained downfall of civilization. The church dominates and has outlawed study of the past.

Plastic banknotes, glass and an iphone are mysterious unknown remnnants of the collapsed civilization. What appalling calamity brought down civilization? Nobody knows. The past is an undiscovered country. In a small remote village various people study a mystery from the past. The ancients of the past have gone down in eternal infamy. Did their hubris cause society to collapse? Finding out is forever impossible.

Medicine and knowledge is now largely forgotten. What became of the ISS? It's not mentioned. What lead to such a catastrophic outcome for humanity in the 2020s? What caused such damaging consequences? Were the ancients really enjoyably oblivious of the coming fall? Why are people threatned with damnation for wanting to study the past?

There is no going back to what once was. Now the perpetual darkness of ignorance covers the land, due to an unknown seismic transformation. Things are ominious and it ends bleakly. Everyday life is dull normalcy. There are hints of the past which exists only in unknowable ruins. The village is deceptively placid.

People have various personal motivations to look into the past. This was very good. There is no speculative light on the past, only guesses and great uncertainty.

Best Lines:

“Fall stillborn to the floor.”

“Hostile muttering.”

“Not much liked.”

“A history he had never stopped to consider.”

“The ancients' roads were shoddy stuff. None survives in such a state.””

“He is unconcered.”

“He was their Moses after all.”

“The ultimate symbol of the ancients' hubris and blasphemy – an apple with a bite taken out of it.”

Illustration by Dóra Kisteleki

The Best Horror Of The Year Volume Eleven edited by Ellen Datlow, part 1


Datlow seems to have dubious taste in horror. Okay.

Best Line:

“Is of course opinionated, which is what one expects from Joshi.”

I Remember Nothing

This Anne Billson story makes no sense.

Monkeys On The Beach

Ugly Americans go on holiday. Bad things happen. What was the point of this?

Painted Wolves

A dull tale of the veldt written with no discerneable talent.

Best Line:

“Prey decay.”

Sh*t Happens

An okay tale of a poo apocalypse.

You Know How The Story Goes

A take on the phantom hitchiker story. Okay.

Back Along The Old Track

A frighteningly serious folk horror set in rural England. A visitor encounters the odd Sleator family. This was excellent and raises many questions and answers none.

Best Lines:

“Comically doom-laden tones.”

“Horribly, coldly certain.”

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Movie Review: The Abandoned (2006)

An adopted woman goes to Russia to find info on her birth mother. 'Horror' happens. This botches every single moment.
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American Horror Story Apocalypse 8x04-8x06 + Krypton 2x01 + New Amsterdam (2018 -?) 1x01 Reviewed

Could It Be...Satan?

The air is not thick with sulphur but with brutal contempt for viewers. This ep causes interminable bordeom. The antichrist has no devlish menace. Characters had identity spells on them. The antichrist is the cause of everyone's problems, always. The antichrist has homicidal confidence. The witches want to save humanity from its terrible fate.

We see the bunker when it was a boy witch school. Billy Porter guest stars. There is ill feeling. Warlocks go on about the alpha: a male Supreme. This was riddled with irrelevancies and fundamentally flawed. Scary is unachievable. BD Wong guest stars. Where's the witches corrective action? There is confected outrage. The dark times are devoid of interest.

A witch turned a rose into butterflies. How did the witch who was burnt at the stake come back? The witches were rude and snotty to the warlocks. The antichrist does constant deceit. The witches are obstinately impervious to sense. The antichrist is intrinsically evil. Queenie was trapped in an evil hotel.

Cordelia has dark culpability. The antichrist is hailed as a mesisah. This was hilariously bland. All may not go as the witches want or expect it to. The antichrist saved Queenie. Madison was trapped in her own personal hell: Wal-Mart. The constant belittling of warlocks went awry. Cordelia is increasingly hostile to sense. Cordelia provoked a response. The antichrist rescued Madison and Queenie. This was not morally complex.

Best Lines:

“Killed my first 3 husbands.”

“Remaking this world.”

“Everyone's dead.”

“Not anymore.”

“Mr butcher man.”

“I don't have any friends.”

“Made some awful thoughts come true.”

“I need it for my incantations.”

“Impressive and troubling.”

“What are those things?”


“A ho even in the afterlife.”

“Good dicking.”

“Most boring annoying white people.”

“My eternal suffering.”

Boy Wonder

Cordelia saw the future to come. Stevie Nicks guest stars and sings, badly. Mallory was a witch pretending to be a servant. She raised a dead fawn. Cordelia is already dying. People can't pronounce coeliac. This was frivolous. What happened to the warlocks? There was bad acting and the antichrist pulled a long con on the warlocks.

Misty is saved from her frog hell. The antichrist was hailed as the new Supreme. There is discord. Nobody is particularly urgent. The Murder House is visited. Reason is seemingly in full retreat.

Best Lines:

“A terrifying future.”

“I've seen what's ahead: carnage, the end of the world.”

“You can't trust our government.”

“There is darkness coming.”

“Smell the sweet rot of a decaying soul.”

“Perfume of death.”

“Something is coming.”

Return To Murder House

36 people died in the Murder House. Dylan McDermott, Connie Britton, Jessica Lange, Billy Porter and Mena Suvari guest star. The gormless husband lurks. Wouldn't preventing the apocalypse be the gravest of emergencies? Death was morally improving for Madison. Tate wants to be loved in unhealthily obsessive fashion.

Madison and Behold deal with the nutty Murder House ghosts. The ghosts respond evasively. Constance lurks and gloats smugly. Madison has sneering aggression. There are stark consequences and peoples character and abilities are attacked. We see how the antichrist was raised. This was risible. Constance had despair about her antichrist grandson. There is tiresome despair.

The antichrist had superior self-satisfaction and is beyond reconciliation. The antichrist is sociopathically ambitious. He spent many terrible years in Murder House. The antichrist caused horrible trauma. Violet lurks. Tate and his antichrist son didn't get on. There were malicious forces at work. People despair of the world.

There is no apocalyptic dread. Why do people keep buying Murder House? The antichrist is bad for humanity. He acutely negatively impacted others. This was a badly misfiring ghoulish disaster. The antichrist was callous and nothing about him is natural. There is ominious Latin chanting and this was oddly captivating.

There is relentless derangement and horrid camp. The plot defies sane analysis. There is no momentum. This delights greatly in its own cleverness. There is disordered randomness. There is giggle-smirking and sedated bafflement. Violet and Tate reunite. The antichrist causes chaos.

Best Lines:

“So many weirdoes.”

“Heidi Klum and Seal!”

“Unoccupied for quite some time.”

“What a sh*thole!”

“I pity the souls trapped here.”

“More crowded than a French youth hostel.”

“You set fire to your mom's boyfriend.”

“Make us more dead.”

“Tear jerker.”

“Amityville reject.”

“Satisfying your husband in the basement.”

“House filled with tragedy.”

“Showed him his true path.”

“I never could have helped you.”

“I never stopped hating him.”

“All who dwell on the Earth will worship him.”

Light Years From Home

Adam Strange whines. Seg-El whines. There is hilariously convoluted exposition. You can't invest emotionally in this. Lyta has gone bad. This was memorably awful and staggeringly inept. What is a zeta beam? Brainiac prances. Baby Cor-Vex lurks. Lobo (played by the showkiller) shows up to annoy.

Best Lines:

“Orbital tether.”

“KISS army.”


Ryan Eggold of 'The Blacklist' and 'The Blacklist: Redemption' stars in this medical drama. He runs a hospital and has a bitch wife and cancer. Tyler Labine is in this. There is suspected Ebola. A snotty woman refuses to provide care. This was okay.