September 9th, 2019


Star Trek Deep Space Nine 7x23&7x25&7x26 + Confess 1x03&1x04 Reviewed 🐈🐈🐈🔮💔💔💔💔💔

Extreme Measures

Bashir takes on Section 31. Bashir registers value judgments. This was painfully cliche. This was the definition of mediocrity. The plot predates 'Inception' by over a decade. The acting is appalling. Bashir has arrogant aggression. The UFP President from 'Homefront/Paradise Lost' is no longer President.

Best Line:

“31 had a man in his cabinet.”

What You Leave Behind part 1

Bashir is a ludicrous twit, he's a sad laughable figure. Bashir and Ezri's morbid fascination goes on. Keiko shows up. O'Brien and his family plan to head back to Earth. Bashir ended up sick, alone, miserable and catatonic in the reboot novels. Kasidy pukes. People have a penchant for the dramatic.

The main crew head out on the new Defiant to Cardassia as part of an armada. Where is the USS Enterprise? The war ends with helpless inevitability. TPTB finally got away from the inflexible need for sameness. There are behavioural challenges. Dukat bores. Winn's behaviour is not oddly perceived. Quark bores and is indifferent.

Dukat does not feel bad about his life choices. There is no apocalyptic dread. There are limited opportunities. The Dominion destroy a city of 2 million people to destroy the resistence. Mila is killed. There are potentially terrible consequences.

There are personally catastrophic events. The Cardassians turn against the Dominion. The female Founder grows more hostile. The female Founder never paid for her sins. Why wasn't Sisko talking to the Romulan leader as well as Martok and Ross?

There are no consistent ethics. There is toxic uncertainty. This was medicore. There is bad acting. Damar dies. There are startling exhortations.

Best Lines:

“If I get lost I'll just follow the ship in front of us.”

“Heroic idiots.”

“The Romulan flagship's been destroyed.”

“We'll try to help.”

“With what?”

“Final words are not permitted.”

“In case they fail.”

“We stop for nothing.”

What You Leave Behind part 2

Weyoun dies. The female Founder refuses to stop the war. Where are the other Founders? The evil Founder should have died instead of getting away with everything. The guest cast is enormous. Odo makes the female Founder order the Jem'Hadar to end the war. Winn and Dukat bore. The war ends, Cardassia is in ruins, Worf becomes an ambassador which was thrown away for the 'TNG' movies. Sigh. Odo heads off to live with the Founders and cure them. WHY?!? Vic sings. Oh stop, just stop. Sisko leaves. Winn dies. Dukat burns with the Pagh Wraiths forever. The acting is so bad. This wasn't good. Jake is left on DS9.

Best Line:

"A door that can never be opened again."

Confess 1x03&1x04

Auburn gets drunk. The custody fight goes on. This does not beget more interest. Auburn gets an offer and causes acrimony. There is emotional misery. Owen does drugs. This was dull, plain dull.

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Scary Books

Movie Reviews: Fast & Furious 7 + Split + Riders + The Monster 🤨😥😝😲😩😡🤬😠🤬😡😠🤬😡😠🤬

Fast & Furious 7 (2015)

This was Paul Walker's last film. Dwayne Johnson, Tony Jaa, Rhonda Rousey, Kurt Russell, Jason Statham, Gal Gadot and Lucas Black star. The bad guy Shaw (Statham) destroyed a hospital to no consequences. Dom and co are used to impunity. The consequences of their past actions are not to their liking. This was not a social good.

People are impunged. There is no visible or ethical leadership or integrity or honesty. There are fist fights and car chases. Hobbs (Johnson) has a kid. Deckard Shaw rampages. It doesn't end well. Dom's wrath is brought down on Shaw. Cars drive out of planes. There is banal discourse. People are low on self insight. People need to re-examine their manner of existing in the world. There is powerful resentment.

This was a monumental folly of narcissim that was breathtakingly incompetent. People are obedient instruments of Dom's will. The characters are cretins. Hobbs is barely in this and breaks his arm cast by flexing. Men wear muscle shirts. Brian reconsiders his adherence to violence. None of this makes any sense.

There is a memorial montage for Paul Walker. His hair in early films was bad. This was not very clever. Nothing stays the same through does it.

Best Lines:

“Stay as long as I want woman.”

“Disappointed with his life.”

“Black ops boys.”

“Sins of London have followed us home.”

“Alpha. Mrs Alpha.”

“Vehicular warfare.”

“Woman I am the cavalry!”

“Once you dig through 38 feet of concrete and steel, my fist and a bodybag will be waiting for you on the other side.”

Split (2016)

This abduction 'thriller' fails to cohere and is uninspired. There is no mounting desperation. James McAvoy and Anya Taylor Joy are weird. The twist is useless as I've never seen 'Unbreakable'.

Riders (1993)

This ITV movie was utterly predictable and entirely useless. There were fake tans and OTT acting in this Jilly Cooper adptation. There were tiny underpants and bad perms and 80s fashion and farcical decisions. This turd was crazy and absurd.

The Monster (2016)

A mother and daughter end up in a sorry state in this unsuprising movie. The mother is a useless lazy drunk. The mother is dumping her daughter on her father. She's an inadequate unit mother. The mother is incapable of rational dialogue. She shirks child raising and it leads to a troublesome outcome.

The daughter has sincere anger. The mother has harsh responses to her child's pain. She doesn't give a damn about her child. They make a life changing discovery of a monster on a dark road. Why did the mother even have custody of her child? The wolf looks like a man under a rug. This was a bit bargain basement. This was not evocative.

The mother was a violent child neflecting useless boyfriend dating POS. Am I supposed to care? The mother was unfit on moral ground. Zoe Kazan and Aaron Douglas featured in this.

Best Lines:

“They are hiding and watching.”

“You never care!”

“You never listen to me!”

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Kylo Ren

Angel Issue 4 Reviewed 🦉🐌🕸🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️🧛‍♂️

I missed issue 3. Angel is in a hell dimension. Lilith mentors Fred. Lilith is aiding Angel. As for Angel, he has a vision of Buffy. Angel has horrible reminders of his past. The demon du jour is defeated. The Source is mentioned. Gunn is seen. Angel quells disorder. There is meaningless epic sounding blather. This was okay.

Best Lines:

“Silent and bound to this void.”

“Your enemies know what is to come.”

“I think I missed most of this conversation.”

“Your future is sorrow.”

“It's hard to remember the cute titles you all give yourselves.”

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Book Review: The Enterprise War 🌙🌛🌜☀🌞⭐🌟🌖🌗🌕🌔🌩🌨🥂🍾🍂🍁🧊🧁🦪🦪🦪🦪💶

Star Trek Discovery: The Enterprise War by John Jackson Miller

This is a dull novel that explain where the Enterprise was during season 1 of 'Star Trek Discovery'. This was hardly ground breaking as the Enterprise and Captain Pike face external threats and catastrophic situations. Baddies are amazingly belligerent and have societal horrors.

Spock is abducted and faces an enemy who control their captives with coercion, violence and threats. This was an abomination and an affront. Baddies have a deep commitment to making threats. This was mind scarringly boring. Pike has an unimpeachable character. People face unspeakable darkness and desperate terrible rage. The mission has a shattering impact on people and Pike is a serene presence.

People serve and do not question. There are acts of defiance, indignation and Spock's captors delight in his objection. I'm utterly mystified at how bad this was. People reach new notions of despair.

People learn consequences. There is disontent, anguish and foreboding. This was horrid. There is chaos and brazen challenges. This was not written with sincerist conviction. There is no coiled unease as the crew live with the awareness of the Klingon war. This was not substantive. This was monumentally uninspiring and goes into steep decline fast. This was not compelling stuff. This was ignominious and straight up stupid.

Best Lines:

“It's raining cyanide.”


“Hell had been visited on the Federation.”

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Trailers, Quotes & Stuff

'The Dead Center' trailer

He died and came back. Maybe.

'Rambo Last Blood' tv spot


'Temple' promo


'Unbelievable' trailer

I read the article.

Best Line:

“Where is the outrage?”

'The College Admissions Scandal' trailer

Ripped from the headlines.

Best Line:

“Without you happening to notice?!?”

Nacho cheese flavour tortilla chips – okay.

Salted caramel M&Ms – okay.

I want a 1981 Thierry Mugler LBD and a black and white satin crepe dress. I want a wool miniskirt.

I'd try black garlic butter. I'd try wild raspberry mousse, bilberry macarons and rosemary & hibiscus syrup. I'd try charred corn and caramel panna cotta and toffee walnuts and a rose petal jelly.

I won't read 'The Return Of The Incredible Exploding Man'.

I want a folding smartphone.

Greene's gone since 2007. Quinnsworth is long gone. Does anyone recall it? Recall Roches Stores?

Who saw 'The Scarlet Empress' or 'The Lazarus Man'?

My ex just wasn't caring anymore. I never noticed. I feel unwavering enmity toward him. And boiling rage and heartbroken fury. My ex makes me feel unseen.

There's a play of 'The Exorcist'?

'Britannia' (2018) was a load of poo full of indescribale wrongdoing.

Best Line:

“Behold gods of Britannia. I am Rome and where I walk is Rome.”

'Crooked House' Quotes:

“Living up to its evil name.”

“A rough school full of thick pigs.”

'Midsomer Murders' Quotes:

“Adequately revolting.”

“You're so superior.”

“Because we are.”

“No one has any recollection of such a will.”

Those with limited tastes.”

“Wasn't liked by many people.”

“After he'd killed his wife and daughter with a meat cleaver.”

“Sad and annoying little nobody.”

“Dead and forgotten.”

“Achieved precisely nothing of note.”

“Not dead but sleepth.”

“He was always alone.”

“Gave up talking to him.”

“Is this an awkward moment?”


“That's quite unforgivable.”

“I don't need forgiveness from this family.”

“You disgust me.”

None of your commie stuff here!”

'RTE News' Quotes:

“Only god could unseat him from power.”

“Economic ruin.”

'Sky News' Quote:

“Girly swot.”

'Channel 4 News' Quotes:

“Rapdily dwindling political options.”

“The ill and the impatient.”

'Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt' Quotes:

“Boom bitch bye!”

“Explain all the jokes to me.”

“Got a ferret in my shirt.”

“Why does it smell like hotel soap in here?”

“That pigeon lady was not like the one in 'Home Alone 2'!”

“You dumb slut!”

“Meth head Charlie.”

“Doctors out there need wives.”

“Got kicked to death by Handmaids.”

“Skimming diarrhoea off the tide pool at Splash Town.”

“Selling my hair on the internet.”

“Grabby grabby takey takey.”

“They're against me!”

“Killed by a woodpecker.”

“Cutting our coke with cat dandruff.”

“Drink your soda and go to bed!”

“I've hated you since before you were born!”

“Now everything's fixed!”

“Turn this place into a meth lab.”

“Took your stupid hillbilly name.”

“Some of that meth everyone's talking about.”

“His best friend nobody.”

“Swimmy things.”

“It's not my fault.”

“Nothing is.”

“Made wine in the toilet.”

'Dr Phil' Quote:

“Beats up anyone who makes her mad.”

'The Irish Times' Quotes:

“Poor judgment he has show in recent days and his capacity for striking the wrong note in public appearances.”

“Didn't know its name or what used to go on there.”

“Seek the return.”

“The faith they claim to profess.”

“A shop you had to pay to be a member of-”

“Damaging interventions.”

“Erring wife.”

“Betrayed under a promise of marriage.”

“Of the better class.”

“Having a choice made for them.”

“Good chaps.”

“Stoking to attack his foes.”

“Escape torment.”

“A place made uneasy by her presence,”

“Weaponised distrust.”

“A city, a culture, a history destroyed.”

“A past hidden by authorities.”

“Moral liberality.”

“Permits no denial.”

“Tried to rescue her reputation.”

“Never offered the full pentience that her critics called for.”

'The Kids Are Alright' Quotes:

“Fake talk show he does with ants.”

“I'm too unhappy.”

'The Gloss Magazine' Quotes:

“Impose routines on others.”

“Copied and pursued rigidly and repetitively.”

“Resist new experiences.”

“Educational issues.”

'Star Trek Discovery' Quotes:

“Dominates all known space.”

“Unconditional hatred and rejection for anything and everything other.”

“Invitation for calamity.”

“Captain Killy.”

'War At Sea' Quote:

“Served a grim purpose.”

'Sister Act' Quotes:

“I'll eat the thing you made!”

“It was hell on Earth. I loved it.”

“Minstering to the winos.”

“4 popes now.”

“Reno scum!”

“Don't leave him bald and yowling in despair!”

“She ain't no nun!”

'Foyle's War' Quotes:

“Alchol, loose women or dancing.”

“My first and only concern.”

“Enormous losses.”

“Chuck it.”

“I make no decisions here.”

'The Sunday Times' Quotes:

“Acceptance of low standards.”

“Threatened to come round to his house and sort things out the way street fighters do.”

“Loutish progeny.”

“Loathing of all human existence.”

“Dominated Western culture ever since.”

“Wasn't good.”

“The glee many seemed to derive from its downfall.”

“Entirely for his use and pleasure.”

“Complained long and loud.”

“Gone to ruin.”

“Doesn't tell the tale you expect it to tell.”

“Telling me they had heard he was dying. It was clear to me it was wishful thinking.”

“Lost a clothing fight with a racoon in a bin.”

“Every civilisation belives it represents the last word in human developments, and that it will endure for ever.”

“Advanded societies have collapsed throughout history, some with bewildering speed.”

“Overwhelmed within a few decades, no one knows by what.”

“Remorseless forces.”

“Fallen with terrible and mysterious suddenness.”

“Do produce a staggering quantity of turd.”

'The Sunday Business Post' Quotes:

“Doesn't make the headlines for the best of reasons.”

“Persons of extremely low morals.”

“He thinks that whatever he thinks is completely the right thing to think,”

“How I Got My Way and Was Proved Right in Everything I Did.”