January 23rd, 2019

Dollanganger

Trailers, Quotes & Stuff

'Detective Pikachu' sneak peek

He's so cute! Where's Team Rocket?


'All Is True' tv spot

Shakespeare retires.


Best Line:

“To us, you're a guest.


'Arrow' 7x11 promo

No.


'Supergirl' 4x11 promo

A mind wipe.


'Safe Harbour' promo

SJW crap.


'Escape Room' tv spot

Yes.


Crinkle cut sea salt & cider vinegar hand cooked crisps – okay.

Mint Modica chocolate – gritty but okay.


Who saw the Super Blood Wolf Moon? I did.


'Batman Forever' (and its unsubtle hammer of subtext) came out in 1995!


Who saw 'Bones' or 'Teeth'?


Vegan mayonnaise is a thing? As is vegan cheesecake?


What is barbecue pulled jackfruit pizza?


'The Sunday Times' Quotes:

“Lost academic respectability.”


“Revoked all titles and honours.”


“Modern censoriousness.”


“People enjoy nothing more than finding somehting or someone they can condemn.”


“The belief that he could do no wrong persisted right up the moment when he did.”


“Creative latte art.”


“Plant-based innovation.”


'The Clinton Affair' Quotes:

“Smaller media universe.”


“Shook every hand in every bowling alley.”


“Object of hatred.”


'The Irish Times' Quotes:

“A region to contain and control.”


“He didn't mean it as a compliment.”


“Did little to quiet the public anger.”


“Online vilification.”


“Stop or I will leave you.”


“Annoyed with me for being so sad.”


“Always his satisfaction first.”


“See that he had the possibility of being a good and responsible man.”


“So sorry and repenting.”


“Self-limiting.”


“Do not feel their body as theirs.”


“Over-complete.”


“Social constructions.”


“So afraid to command respect and decent behaviour from men in case they scare them off, simply by coming across as too eager.”


“Apetite for fake foods.”


“Let good opportunities go.”


“Spirtually vibrant.”


“The victim of a vast conspiracy of rivals.”


“The way they live their lives seems so different to how you're living yours.”


'Batman' (1966) Quotes:

“A sparrow with a machine gun!”


“Wonder midget!”


“Hand me down the shark repellent bat spray!”


Michael Cole Quote:

“I AM DISGUSTED!”


'Aertel' Quote:

“Anti-community.


'American Housewife' Quotes:

“Car garbage.”


“Quiet makes me nervous.”


“The weird aisle in the grocery store.”


“Feeling a little unheard.”


“I'm missing things!”


“Yeast butter.”


“He looks homeless but he's spending 15 bucks on hemp milk.”


“Children sad. Mom happy.”


“Let her live in a box.”


“Leather belts are made out of animals so I gave them all a proper burial.”


'The Plantagenets' Quotes:

“Forced to flee from his own subjects.”


“Yoke of servitude.”


“Drew their weapons to avenge him.”


“Ever greater reverence.”


“Looking for support. He found none.”


“Watching everyone and addressing no-one.”


'Batman Who Laughs' Quotes:

“You don't have to do this.”

“I know.”




Hawkeye

Archie Meets Batman '66 3 & 6 Reviewed

Archie Meets Batman '66 Issue 3

Riddler has a bad guy protegee. There is no pensive melancholy. Dick travels in the sidecar of Barbara's bike and they wear dorky helmets. There's a villain called Footnote? There's a pool party. Joker tries to convert Jughead to evil. This was comically awful, full of incompetence and failure. The Riverdale kids wear dumpster attitre. Dick has no persoanlity just chronic deference to Batman.


This was an unmitigated horror. One feels bewildered frustration at how bat-villains upending the lives of Riverdale kids is such an epic failure. There's no moral chaos. Batman sustaining his moral philosophy is not funny or affable. This title has hit a terminal slump.


Best Lines:

“He's like the son I never had. Or wanted.”


“What about these meddling kids – they're everywhere?”


“Believe me, they make a lot of things happen aorund here.”


~

Archie Meets Batman '66 Issue 6

This was low concept with a lack of effort.

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Pretty Smart

Book Reviews: The Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane +Spot 50 Cats +Buried Lies

The Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane by Laird Koening

This is not the novel but a play adapdation of said novel by Dramatists Play Service Inc. The novel is sadly out of print. A teen girl, Rynn, fends off the local ceep Frank Hallett. She is befriended by the silly Mario and the cop Miglioriti. Oddly Miglioriti does not arrest the local perv as the perv's mother has some sort of clout in town or something.


Rynn has stuckness and is consumed by rage. The perv is problematic and is deliberately and consciously awful as he subjects Runn to intimidation and threats and lazy cliches. This was inconsequential. Rynn's attempts to save herself from bad people leads to disquieting consequences that are disturbing, unpredictable and tragic. The sleazy ambience is high and there is no persistent feeling of dread. This can't be necessary.


~
Spot 50 Cats

This slim book is a kid's guide to pedigree cat breeds. It's slight.


~
Buried Lies by Kristina Ohlsson

People deal badly with the consequences of their life choices in this translated Swedish novel about a violent jerk lawyer trying to clear the name of a deceased, confessed serial killer. This was sadly lacking and appalling, absolutely appalling. This is racist and the 'hero' has a laughable brooding sense of maleness.


Best Lines:

“Who the hell calls himself Bobby T. In Stockholm?”


“Did all they could to sabotage their own future.”

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Scary Books

The X Files 11x08-11x10 +Charmed 1x03 Reviewed 🤣🤣👀👀😢😢😆😆🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♀️🐱‍🏍

Familiar

This season isn't awash with opportunity. A child is lured and killed. Why aren't the duo looking for William? People talk about coyowolves. Roger Cross guest stars. There is no sign of the darkest and most dangeorus ideas. Mulder talks insane troll logic. Mulder and Scully are viewed with contempt. Scully profiles. Mulder is the profiler! Mulder sniffs out dark magic.


There is no emotional intensity. Scully reminds Mulder that he once worked in violent crime. Creepy kids tv characters prance. There is another death. Mulder and Scully pity a perv. Things are fractious. The grimmer manifestations of smalltown life are seen. A witch has unleashed a curse. This had promise but becomes mildly hilarious and ardous to watch at the end. This show has lost its way and its soul.


Best Lines:

“Typically be a man.”


“What's a hellhound now?”


“John Wayne Gacy with a monkey.”


“I did not see that coming.”


“I will not forgive you.”


Nothing Lasts Forever

Mulder's co-workers are longtime opponents of him. TPTB remember Scully is Catholic. There are abounding cliches and stolen organs. People who are sort of vampires (without the supernatural part) act malignantly. Mulder has no valuable insight. There is weirdness and no emotional investment. Monsters pass unnoticed. There is no appalling fascination.


There is a cult led by a failed actress turned modern day vampire. Mulder ndded glasses. The plot makes no sense. A woman slays the 'vampires' and their servants. Mulder lists off all the things Scully has lost. This was not good.


Best Lines:

“We found reasons to become interested.”


“Become something she will never be.”


“For unnatural purposes.”


“Nothing much ever again.”


My Struggle IV

17 years ago Scully gave up William. Sadly William is a tool, with powers. Skinner annoys. William caused a multiple car pile-up and didn't care. Smoking Man is William's father/creator. The tv host from season 10 returns briefly. Where are the aliens? The X Files are to be closed (again) and the duo are to be fired (again). Barbara Hershey and Joel McHale and Annabeth Gish and Ben Cotton guest star. Where are Lauren Ambrose and Robbie Amell?!? Skinner sneaks, lord I hate him.


There are flashbacks. Where's Skinner? CSM is an evil mainipulating mastermind. Mulder hates CSM with all his being. Various people die. William is an idiot who won't talk to his parents and does a runner. Season 12 is set up and there are dangling plot threads. William the ass has no commitment, courage or self-development. William makes people explode. Obvious sources of concern are ignored.


There is no enormous distress. Nobody talks to each other. William is highly irritating and deeply unpleasant. Scully is over-negative. There is bad decision-making and judgment. There are reckless decisions. This is not of critical importance. People are consumed with negative thoughts. William has no shame.


People in positions of responsibility and authority can't be trusted. Stupid teenagers are stupid. Arguments are ramped up. The world is a terrifying place. Gillian Anderson hated this ep. Understandably. One is affronted by how stupid William is. Things are dangerous and complicated. One is weary of this. Mulder is weary with resignation. This was below-par and terrible. The script is unconvincing to the point of insult.


This was woeful. Every cliche is being exhausted. Chris Carter has a maddening pattern of ruining this show. Where is Spender? Things don't work out for anyone the way they wanted or planned. The foundational elements of this show have been ruined. I just hated this. The show's credibility has been damaged. The plot cannot sustain even casual analysis. This was inexorably stupid. With eyes glaring hate, Mulder murders his father.


CSM shot who he thought was Mulder in the head with callous vicious unflinching glee. Scully shrugs off Mulder murdering his father and they accept that William isn't theirs at all. So they've been tortured for 17 years of wilful misunderstanding. William was an experiment, not their child. Oddly Emily isn't mentioned. There is delusion and violence. William has disconcertingly inherited CSM's utter ruthlessness. Scully's pregnant in her 50s! This show has become distorted to something very different. This ep is an INSULT.


Best Lines:

“I don't care if it is true!”


“His superiors label it fake news. Shocker.”


“Who his father is.”


“You'd shoot your own first born son?”

“Shot my second born son once.”


~
Sweet Tooth

Harry rants about the harbinger of hell and demons of unspeakable horror. The sisters are bimbos who have off-putting behaviour. The sisters spew SJW crap. It's Halloween. And there are demons. Yawn. The future don't look too good for this dreck.


Best Line:

“The deafening screams of human torment!”

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PromNight2

Movie Reviews: Io + Sins Of The Preacher

Io (2019)

In this good sci-fi film, Earth's atmosphere changed and the Exodus Mission left Earth for a colony on Io. A woman lives near the ruins of NY carrying out the work of her father (Danny Huston) who thought humanity could find a way to survive on the changed Earth. She has eye makeup and waxed legs and armpits in the post-apoc world. How she gets water isn't explained. She communicates with a friend on the Io colony, where apparently life isn't easy.


She has bees. Why didn't she go to Io? Her friend talks of a New World Expedition Fleet that will leave Io find humanity a new home on a exoplanet near Proxima Centauri. The air on Earth is running out. The last Exodus Shuttle will leave soon. But still the heroine stays, somehow she has power and food. How does she have oxygen? A storm rolls in and kills 99% of her bees. She's sad and doesn't plan to catch the last flight out until a hot air balloon shows up.


Anthony Mackie of 'Pain & Gain' disembarks the hot air balloon. The heroine lies about her father dying. They drink brown water and discuss the adverse consequences of climate change. The animals and birds died. Were any taken to Io? Or are all they extinct? The heroine discusses her friend on Io who is named Elon. Oh I see what you did there TPTB. She discusses a pig her father had. Elon says he is going on the New World mission which will take 10 years and warns her that all transmission links with Earth will be cut after the final Exodus Launch.


Mackie says her father was wrong to tell people to stay on Earth and caused people to starve to death including his own wife. The heroine is sad. Secrets are discussed. They plan to travel to the site of the last ever Exodus shuttle. They stop for a discussion of Leda And The Swan. She stays. I presume he goes. She has a message. WTF was that ending? I enjoyed this.


Best Lines:

“Dis-confirm.”


“The final Exodus Launch to Io.”


“Seek life no matter what.”


“Working hard to find a new home.”


“Near identical Earth twin.”


“Takes 10 years to get there.”


“You're from before.”


“Nothing anywhere.”


“The future we got was unthinkable.”


“Fear our planet.”


“Fled to the strs.”


“If any do choose to stay.”


“Many, many years.”


“Dead for a long time.”


“Even the birds all died.”


“Too far to cross.”


“The universe is calling for us.”


~
Sins Of The Preacher (2013)

Gail O'Grady stars in this true story. A woman dies of an apparent suicide. Oddly there is no autopsy, no headstone and a typed unsigned suicide note. The dead woman's mother (O'Grady) has hysterics. She also doesn't sit near her grandchildren in church. Her preacher son in law acts dodgy. He bins his dead wife's photos and moves his mistress in. He gives her his dead wife's phone and steals his dead wife's money. The son in law has zero remorse and a psychotic detachment from reality. The cops are uncaring. The mother and some friends look for justice and clues. The mistress who looks like a Playboy Playmate prances. Finally some justice happens and the son in law rails as his dead wife's body is exhumed. This is based on the Matt and Kari Baker case. The mistress knew what the son in law did and testifies against him and he gets 65 years. This was okay.


Best Lines:

“Way too modest for that.”


“Cannot hear this!”


“After what I did for you?”


“How awful he is.”


“What kind of man doesn't have friends?”


“He's a good christian man.”

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