May 8th, 2018

Pretty Smart

3 Book Reviews

Heartburn by Nora Ephron
A fictionalised account of the author’s failed marriage to the insufferable cheating bore Carl Bernstein who had a highly inflated ego and was petulant. This was fun and I never saw the movie.

~
The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf
Not good.

~
The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter
No.
  • Current Music
    Heaven Is A Place On Earth - Belinda Carlisle/Take A Chance On Me - Abba/Stop - The Spice Girls/Jesse Hold On/C‘est La Vie - B*Witched/So Young - The Corrs
  • Tags
Hawkeye

5 Comics Reviewed

Bongo Comics Free-For-All! Free Comic Book Day
This is ‘The Simpsons’ in comic book form. Lisa annoys, Bart is a brat, Milhouse bores and Cletus is abducted. This does not fulfil its obligation to entertain.

Best Lines:
“Some scoffed at me for majoring in English Lit, but look at me now! Gainfully employed!”

“Grab a critter outta the road kill pile and hold ‘em over this here cookin’ fire. Tonight, we eats like the middle class!”

~
DC SuperHero Girls: Free Comic Book Day
Since when are Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy heroes? Who is Cheshire? Who is Bumblebee? Batgirl wears a non-existent mask and a useless hood. Catwoman lurks. This was annoying and twee and nobody has a problem with underage girls fighting crime. Lois Lane annoys and how can Wonder Woman fly?

~
Bob’s Burgers: Free Comic Book Day
There is no logical storyline progression in this risible mass of trash imagery.

Best Lines:
“A symbol for hubris and overconfidence.”

“Tell the band to stop playing all that sad stuff they were playing earlier.”

“One time I convinced him mom wanted a broom for her birthday.”

~
Barriers: Free Comic Book Day
This had dead animals, pages in Spanish, cocaine, porn and then aliens show up. This was trite, shallow and brattish. It was plain terrible and full of a hostile atmosphere, moral outrage and adversity. This is not a stark insight into morally compromised modern day America facing fearsome threats.

Best Lines:
“Scary blimps.”

“A bunch of paranoid lunatics.”

~
Shadowman: Free Comic Book Day
There is voodoo in the swamp, meanwhile in another storyline with ugly art a guy flies around in outer space being boring. Then is yet another storyline psiots are bothered. Only the 1st story is good and has noble ambition.
  • Current Music
    Swag Queen - Extreme/Under Attack - Amy Stroup/We Are The Young Ones - Eatraxx/Big Spender - Shirley Bassey
  • Tags
Illya K

Trailers, Quotes and Stuff

‘Arrow’ 6x22 promo
Diaz whines as does Oliver about terrible people and moral harm.

‘Riverdale’ 2x21 promo
People scream, there is violence and a riot. This looks ugh.

Best Lines:
“You were in on this?”

“Out-number us one hundred to one.”

‘Counterpart’ promo
No.

‘Counterpart’ promo
Blah.

‘Counterpart’ promo
No.

FIAT 500 Abarth ad
Ugly Charlie Sheen pimps a car. No.

‘Tabula Rasa’ promo
I would like to see more.

Peacock Fighting A Turkey Video
Ha!

Gluten free southern fried mini chicken breast fillets - okay.

Recall Bronski Beat?

Who saw ‘The Brothers McMullen’ or ‘Suddenly Last Summer’ (1959)?

Don’t Look Now’ (1973) is rubbish. ‘Silkwood’ (1983) was murky.

What is watermelon salsa?

I hope to review ‘Red Sparrow’ and ‘Quantico’ season 3 at some point.

There will be a ‘Rambo 5’?

Who saw ‘A Bridge Too Far’?

I want a herb zipper.

I won’t read ‘School For Psychics’.

Recall ITV’s ‘Cluedo’ in 1991? Apparently David McCallum was in it.

There will be 2 ‘Shadowhunter’ sagas? ‘The Last Hours’ and ‘The Wicked Powers’?

‘Lord Of Shadows’ Quotes:
“They will have no mercy on you.”

“Something of a loner - for obvious reasons, it now appears.”

“Didn’t think that counted as social interaction.”

“Magic pencils.”

“Whose needs he was expected to cater to.”

‘BBC News’ Quotes:
“Lawn tractor.”

“Settling their disputes.”

“Public protection.”

‘Reeling In The Years’ Quote:
“Reasoned analysis of the facts of the case.”

‘Sky News’ Quote:
“Exoplanets around other stars.”

‘The Simpsons’ Quote:
“Mix-ins.”

‘The Irish Times’ Quotes:
“Did little for its reputation.”

“Eruptive activity.”

“Campaign of lies.”

‘Cracked’ Quote:
“Hospitalizing a lawyer who opposed them in court by hiding a snake in his mailbox.”

‘The Sunday Times’ Quotes:
“Admire the gracious lifestyle and smart friends of someone we don’t know all that well.”

“Brittle and underfed.”

“Particularly pleased with themselves.”

“Modish food.”

“Built on an intricate web of unspoken assumptions.”

“Receiving entity.”

“Pscyhonauts.”

“Declared the most dangerous man in America.”

“Long-running neighbourhood dispute.”

“Riven with dislikes and petty disagreements.”

“Regarded her as a nuisance.”

“Go to parties I wasn’t invited to and people would be bummed out I was there.”

“Enhance war fighter performance.”

“Come to notice.”

“Leave and disown your past?”

“Feel like an abandoned trash barge.”

“Feel like one of those women in a Lifetime movie where the Nanny kills the family.”

“Houses can be deadly places - especially for women.”

“The band’s peak era of featuring the Edge playing guitar while striding purposefully toward the horizon.”

“The charm of an unkempt busker.”

“Faux enthusiasm.”

“Cloying persona.”

“Prefer that he’d stand down wind from you.”

“A literary form that is practically defunct.”

“Something bad happened in a quiet corner of a vast, indifferent universe.”

“Bent the cosmos to the service of mankind.”

“Incapable of serious thought.”

“Feeling satisfied about your conduct.”

“Find a partner who loved her.”

“Moral invertebrates.”

“Question-begging.”

“Steer the dialogue in directions you know will interest them.”

“Culturally ancient.”

“Nostalgic pastoral.”

“Youthful moral superiority.”

“Easily acquired difference.”

“Too agenda driven.”

“Try to become less unpopular.”

‘Invisible Killers’ Quotes:
“Samples of scabs.”

“The awfulness of smallpox.”

“Highest security lab.”

“The human race won, maybe.”

“Bio-threat.”

“Strategic national stockpile.”

“Disease threats.”

“Horsepox.”

“Money and intent.”

“Medical countermeasures.”

“Looming shadow.”

‘Unmasking a Killer’ Quote:
“Low crawling.”

‘Dr Phil’ Quotes:
“Dramatic walk off.”

“SORRY BASTARD!”

“Got problems with sentence structure.”

“I didn’t know police reports expired.”

“2 of my haters conspired against me.”

“Tell terrible lies about people.”

“Running a pill mill out of Florida.”

“Threw her into a door.”

~
On ‘Hollyoaks’: where are Kim’s parents? Ryan is still in the opening credits! There is no imaginative vitality or buoyant wit. Harry lies. James shows up. Harry has low cunning. Kim’s terrifying ordeal has affected her. Her infected wound leaves her with just a bandage. This is not pared down, lucid or propulsive. Ryan’s dead. There is a camping site and loch near Chester? Ste is told by Harry about murdering Ryan. Knowing Ste, he’ll be turned on.

Best Lines:
“What have I done?”
“What does it matter?”
Scary Books

Tabula Rasa (2017 - ?) 1x01 + Supergirl 3x16 + Counterpart (2018 - 2019) 1x01-1x03 Reviewed

Spectre
This intriguing Belgian drama in Flemish with subtitles sees Mie locked up in a nut ward due to suffering a form of amnesia after a car accident. Her husband Benoit and her mother visit whilst a tramp looking policeman bothers her about a missing man named Spectre. A grim reckoning seems inevitable. This was good and has nice opening credits.

Who is the sensation seeking genuinely sinister fellow patient of Mie’s who keeps bothering her? Why does nobody stop it? This was enormously entertaining. She has no credible answers to the cop’s questions. The grim hectoring cop annoys. This has baroque ingenuity. Why is the cop allowed to harass her? Why is the mildly creepy fellow patient bothering Mie?

Mie has wariness and faces moralistic judgements by the cop who is unchallengeable. The car crash was the damaging ruin of Mie’s
life. She has tortured misery. Where is her daughter Romy? Why does the grandmother seemingly have 2 names? Mie is lacking in joy and has weary stoicism. The cop is unpleasant and everything causes Mie has stress and anxiety. Why is Mie a suspect? Who is the figure she saw in the woods? Why is Thomas Spectre missing and who was he?

Flashbacks to 3 months ago show Mie happy. Now she’s in the nut house for no discernible purpose other than the cop wants her locked up. Why is this case so important to him? Mie has existential distress and the uninteresting cop has dark theories. What grim events happened? Why is the cop so intractable? Why does Mie have self erasure? Is someone committing her moral harm?

Flashbacks to 3 months ago show that the basement of the house they moved into near the woods was flooded. Yet they did nothing about it and kept the basement door unlocked. Why was Benoit in the basement? Romy broke a mirror. Was it expansive generosity that Benoit installed a huge security system? The fellow patient seems suffused with cruelty. The cop is anger fuelled and full of vile implications and toxic condescension.

Is Mie facing attitudinal distortion? How did she go from happy to mournful and locked up against her will? The cop’s unshakeable convictions see him wantonly stirring up tension about Mie’s presumed responsibility for something; one dislikes him and his empty wind-baggery. Why doesn’t Benoit interact with Romy? Where is the cat? Why doesn’t Mie have an appropriate adult with her when the cop badgers her? The cop wants her to smell something.

Flashbacks show unfriendly mothers when Mie did the school run. Mie also met a creepy recycler worker who is Thomas Spectre. She has flashes of memory. What does she remember? What happened? The cop is keeping Mie locked up until Spectre is found. Are he and Benoit gaslighting her? How did she end up in the nut house? The cop is combative. Before her car accident Mie was a famous actress! This was good.

Best Lines:
“Kept evil spirits out.”

“The spirits came in through the cracks.”

“An induction hob. So you can’t burn down my inheritance.”

“His disturbing disappearance.”

~
Of Two Minds
Saturn Girl has a collective refusal to listen and blithely contends murder. There is no moral content. Dialogue is constructed to celibately sound ominous without revealing too much of the plot. Saturn Girl wants to make a terrible event unhappen, the issue is - one doesn’t care.

Kara is predictably indignant and defensive when Saturn Girl is hostile. TPTB don’t listen to internet indignation about Mon-El. Sam has desperate sadness. Reign has violent fury. TPTB position Mon-El to look good and fail. They are so going to split up Mon-El and Saturn Girl and have him hook up with Kara.

Lena is verifying and assessing Reign. Or is it a strategic association? Saturn Girl is deplorable. Reign is an interesting and worthy adversary. We’ll see about Purity and Pestilence.

Saturn Girl talks like a 5 year old and claims justified outrage. Brainy looks like a greasy drug dealer and sneaks. Saturn Girl and her stupid accent annoys. James does nothing. Saturn Girl can’t act and has a pathological aversion to sense. Brainy and Saturn Girl lie and there are buckets of sap. There is a big reveal and where did Reign get her outfit from?

Purity shows up. Where is Superman? Where is Max Lord? Mon-El berates his bint wife. Alex gets sick. There is no sense of impending disaster and Lena has hubris. There is a stupid fight and Pestilence rises and gets her evil outfit, evil hairdo and evil eye makeup.

Best Lines:
“Over promise.”

“Mass wildlife death.”

“Talk me into being redeemed.”

~
The Crossing
This crap show seems like a crap version of ‘Fringe’. People run around ‘Berlin’ and a woman talks about the other side. J.K. Simmons and Jamie Bamber star. This has okay opening credits. Howard (Simmons) has a weird job in foreign-land and this ep is staid. One feels inattention for this self-consciously highbrow pretentiousness. This ep which sees Howard learn about another world and meets his other self can induce somnolence.

There is dated tech and cod formality and no intricate human drama. Howard has a disordered relationship with his comatose wife Emily and his brother in law (Bamber) is a prat. This was appalling feebleness, that is entirely unsatisfying. Howard stares slack jawed at himself. Apparently 30 years ago a Cold War experiment opened up a passage to a parallel world. Howard 2 supplies that info so it may not be true.

Nobody really tells Howard anything. Which is the real world? Howard ruminates on the sum of all her has done, hopes to do or ever will. There is no emotional involvement. There is death and listlessness. Howard 2 is lying. This was not interesting or satisfying and it has no dim melancholy. The brother in law annoys. This ep was tiresome hackery. The socially devalued Howard has a purpose now. Howard 2 is cool and has intelligence and wit. The utterly inconsiderate brother in law is memorably dreadful. Howard’s sense of place and purpose is shaken.

Best Lines:
“Non-approved exchange.”

“Well, this is disappointing.”

“You’re sceptical; you’ve made that very clear.”

“Meet their other.”

“Section 2 is real.”

Birds Of A Feather
This was all vacuosness and it is not explained why things are so fraught with danger. There is violence aplenty. Emily 2 is a bitch. Howard is a blearily flailing pub bore. This misfires as Emily 2 causes ruinous consequences in this portentous doze fest. There is no elegant storytelling cohesion. This was not emotionally raw.

Emily 2 chortles disdainfully. One feels perpetual irritation at this. Stephen Rea is in this and Bamber out. Howard 2 has an ability to upset people. Emily 2 does unnecessary provocation and has vindictiveness and is quarrelsome. There are histrionic games. Rea chats to Howard 2. What is with Emily 2’s relentless demonization of Howard 2? This show is spectacularly misjudged. What happened in Istanbul? What drugs did Emily 2 abuse? Emily 2 needs to stop behaving negatively.

Who is the assassin? She looks like she has herpes infested mouth. This ep misfired. Howard 2 now claims that the Cold War experiment split 1 reality into 2. So this was not a case of parallel universes. The assassin’s double is a violinist. There is gratuitous nudity. How did the assassin cross over if there is only 1 crossing and it is heavily regulated?

People talk portentously. There are guns and violence. This show is an unremittingly hell that is not magnificently flawed. Did the violinist die after being shot by a sniper? Yep sadly. The assassin is arrested. She’s called a crosser. Various people dislike Howard 2 when they first meet him as do most people. People are incautious. Stephen Rea hangs out with Emily 2 and says the other side did something to them. Stephen Rea’s character name is named Alexander Pope. I'm sure he is the big bad as he is a name actor.

Best Lines:
“Maybe some day it will burn down.”

“Drink and anger.”

“How does playing with this woman’s underwear give us any useful information?”

“You share more than you think.”

“How’ve you been feeling?”
“Mmm, much better these days. Thank you”
“Isn’t that a shame.”

“Pit guards.”

“A city that’s not her own.”

The Lost Art Of Diplomacy
Howard’s world is not the real one. He chats to his comatose wife. Guy Burnet and Richard Schiff are in this. Emily 2 watches an ad about public health in a cinema and there is a hand sanitizer. What is the disease the ad warns about? What caused Emily’s coma? There is sex and gratuitous nudity. Howard’s boss has a family but he bangs a hooker. His father in law (Schiff) sneers.

People talk very slowly. The ambassador (Burnet of ‘Hollyoaks’) whines about not having a right to travel. People want to use the assassin to negotiate stuff. Emily 2 crosses over. There are rules about crossing over. I actually felt a glimmer of interest in this ep. The crossover is weird looking.

The other side has cleaner oceans but no genetically modified food. But it did suffer a pandemic that decimated its cities. Schiff demands census info and maps of petroleum deposits. What caused the pandemic? Emily 2 accuses Pope of plotting; he’s not in this ep. Howard 2 suggests something stupid. Emily has secrets. Is Emily 2 dead? I’m confused.

Best Lines:
“Nothing in it belongs to you.”

“We all have to go through alone.”

“Will be the end of you.”
  • Current Music
    Feed The Beast - A R I Z O N A/Ember - Katherine McNamara/Magic - Flor/Here & Now - Dresses/The Look Of Love - Burt Bacharach
  • Tags
    , ,