June 9th, 2016


Trailers, Quotes and Stuff

‘Independence Day: Resurgence’ TV spot

‘The Conjuring 2’ TV spot

‘Raising Helen’ (2004) promo

‘Bad Lieutenant’ (1992) promo

‘Are We There Yet?’ (2005) promo

‘Ladder 49’ promo

‘The Ugly Truth’ promo

‘Cellular’ (2004) promo

‘Rambo’ (2008) promo

‘When Harry Meet Sally’ (1989) promo

‘Nacho Libre’ (2006) promo

‘See Dad Run’ promo

‘Terminator 2’ teaser trailer

Peach Cobbler yogurt - okay.
Cucumber, Avocado & Lime smoothie - okay.
Raspberry jelly - very good.
Cooling mint yogurt dip - okay.
Sweet crudité selection - okay.

I will review ‘The Loney’ and ‘The Magicians’.

I won’t read ‘Seveneves’.

‘A Shot In The Dark‘ (1964), ‘Invaders From Mars‘ (1986), ‘Aladdin’ (1992) and ‘Deadly Pursuit’ (1988) were okay.

Never saw the 1984 ‘Runaway’ or the 1985 ‘The Black Cauldron’.

‘Tremors‘ and ‘Four Rooms’ were bad films.

I miss ‘Eerie Indiana’ but not ‘Round The Twist’.

‘RTE News’ Quote:
“Feud related violence.”

Dr Phil’ Quotes:
“Particularly descriptive term.”

“Lied on social media three times about being pregnant.”

“Run up 3000 dollars worth of bills.”

“Invite strangers you meet on the internet to your house.”

“Had to pay them to leave.”

“The lizard stayed for a year.”

“Did you lay down in the middle of the street?”

“Threw me off the chair.”

“Dispensing life changing advice on the internet.”

“The things she’s getting caught doing.”

“Fraudulently purchased items.”

“Absolutely no consequence whatsoever.”

‘The Irish Times’ Quotes:
“Drugs don’t work in patients who don’t take them.”

“Sensing your doctor cares.”

“Impact significantly on your activities.”

“For fear of negative remarks.”

“Just existing.”

“It places an excellent roll call of musicians in the middle of the desert and invites privileged brats to come and completely ignore them while they tweet about themselves.”

‘Nell’ Quotes:
“He was literally foaming at the mouth.”

“She looked wretched.”

“The awful intimation of my future.”

“This passed for sexual daring.”

“The feeling of being excluded.”

“Give scandal by the very fact of living.”

‘Follow Donal’ Quote:
“Belly full of brilliance.”

On ‘Neighbours’: Paul’s convicted after a 2 episode trial and gets 18 years. Somehow Terese’s perjury doesn’t get a mistrial declared. Terese and her single abiding preoccupation of getting Paul, her bile and venom and total commitment to being gross should make her a lightening rod for outrage but oddly does not.

Piper judges Terese. Brad and Lauren are fine with Terese’s arrogance and contempt and insincere advocacy. Ned pulls faces. Terese is drinking and gets arrested by Brennan, the only copper in town. What happened to Paul’s penthouse? Amy shames fat crow Terese. Lauren is a disgusting woman. Terese is fired by Quill and her weird accent. How the compass of public distain has turned.

Shameless Terese and her inexcusable lack of class deserves it. Paul gives up. Terese sucks down booze, Brennan is awful, Quill says she’ll sue Steph and why is Tyler dating a schoolgirl?

Best Lines:
“False accusation.”

“We can’t afford to be associated with you.”

On ‘Hollyoaks’: Leela acts like a slut. Ste is angry and confronts Harry over his lies. Ste is a hairy former drug dealer and judges Harry for cheating. Ste ignores the fact that he is a cheater. Ste throws Harry out. Freddie recalls his daughter and doesn’t want her. Tony wonders at Harry’s stupidity. Ste wants Cameron gone. The writers have mad logic. Ste assaults and poisons James. Ste is not good Northern solid working class stock.

Ste and his serial dating has no bleak majesty. Mercedes has gone from ho to housewife. James makes insinuations, he has panache. Too much cocaine has fried Ste’s brain. Harry and his body-huggging shirts wants Ste back. Ste attacks the pathetic Harry. Ste does sweet damn all to deserve so much devotion. Moral judgements are made. Cameron tempts Ste with crystal meth, oh very understated.

The grim faced pretty much loathed Ste has moral importance. Freddie rejects his daughter. Nobody has presence or exquisite precision. Blooded but unbowed Cameron implacably plots. There is no sense of the characters. Ste is awful. A social worker shows up. John-Paul messes up the exams. Ste is a moron and probably syphilitic. This was negating and has no emotional investment. Ste has an overdeveloped sense of impending misfortune.

Best Lines:
“You cheated on me for money.”

“You got no friends anymore.”

“A penniless loser who has sex with people for money.”

“The last person needed in his life.”

“I’m sorry.”
“Are ya?”

“I can’t believe you’re doing crystal meth in the living room!”

“The very sight of you makes me feel sick.”

“I tore apart my whole family to be with a killer.”

“There was no tone.”
Scary Books

Book Reviews: Through The Looking Glass + The Wilt Alternative + 3 others

Through The Looking Glass And What Alice Found There by Lewis Carroll
The annoying child Alice goes through a looking glass to have facetious adventures. One has to be monumentally patient to get through this tale of Alice doing things for no good reason at all. This was randomly mundane and full of bad life choices and no colourful excess just Alice and her virtue signalling.

Best Lines:
“But it may rain outside?”
“It may - if it chooses,”

“Because he was looking for a hippopotamus. Now as it happened there wasn’t such a thing in the house, that morning.”
“Is there generally?”

“A little kindness - and putting her hair in papers - would do wonders with her -”

The Wilt Alternative by Tom Sharpe
This 1979 novel is the 2nd of 5 books about Henry Wilt, a man not fond of his job, his wife, his children or life. He lusts after the lodger and her contemptuous hauteur until she turns out to be a criminal who sparks a siege in his mcmansion. This was a very good comic read even if the 1970s sexism and Wilt’s loathing of his family can be jaw dropping. One wonders why social services are not involved with the Wilt family especially in light of the events of the 1st novel, the Wilts turbulent marriage and the Wilt’s quadruplets debilitating fights and precious language. Sharpe may be funny, but 4 year olds do not talk like that.

Wilt is a deliriously unreconstructed oaf who faces many narrative rebukes yet has social invulnerability and is unassailable for his indiscreet self-amusements. Eva Wilt faces the insufferable pressure of the alternative life and this novel is full of 70s social questions/tropes. The lodger has a total commitment to being an awful person. Authority figures make indignant remonstrances. And this is a hilarious tale of self-sufficiency, oddly prescient political ranting and comically inept criminals.

Best Lines:
“The perversity of circumstances which rendered him incapable of being believed.”

“An accident in the family process.”

“She could hear Wilt muttering to himself most alarmingly.”

“He would never understand what those two diabolical people saw in one another.”

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery
A haunting children’s novella.

Mistral’s Daughter by Judith Krantz
This 1982 novel is about artists’ models in their wild heyday, artists, World War 2, secrets and models. This is a no and does not satisfy the soul.

Princess Daisy by Judith Krantz
This 1980 novel tells the tale of a stoic and graceful princess, her brain damaged sister, incest, poverty, art and padding. This was made into a bad miniseries with Ringo Starr. This does not create global joy.
To Light The Way To Bed

Blindspot 1x23 + Versailles 1x02 + Unforgotten 1x02 Reviewed

Why Await Life’s End
Kurt is having a mental crisis. Jane seeks help. Lady Tommy Lee Jones shows up. Jane was morally disloyal. Rickety old certainties have fallen away. In lieu of loving and being loved, Kurt’s Taylor Shaw obsession took over his life. And he was right all along, his father was a killer.

Jane has memories. Tasha, Reade and Patterson tentatively investigate. Kurt has rethought things. Jane’s gang are frighteningly awful, every utterance of theirs is fronted with hyperbole. Who is this Sheppard that Jane’s gang are beholden to? Kurt finds Taylor Shaw’s remains and his infatuation with Jane cracks. The Shaw cover was a cruel way to control Kurt.

A sombre and terrifying season 2 seems imminent. Jane’s gang are crazy. Jane fights Oscar. Insinuations of bad things to come are made. Complex and divisive things happen. What is Orion? It is worryingly apparent that Kurt has cracked and bad things are coming. Kurt takes a hardline intensely personal position on Jane. Taylor Shaw is dead 25 years and so Kurt arrests Jane. This was very good.

Best Lines:
“You were never Taylor Shaw.”

“We’re trained not to leave a trace.”

“Tried to turn you against us.”

“What’s Phase 2?”

“You hate the FBI!”

“Now we’re in it too.”

Versailles 1x02
Louis boffs his brother’s wife. Louis looks bored. The female doctor saves the queen. Louis orders his courtiers to wear French clothes. Louis checks the ancestry of his courtiers and throws out any fakers. The Queen’s baby is dumped on nuns and a maid is murdered to cover it up. Rich people go shopping. There are negative attitudes all round. This was okay if not utterly captivating. This show has little grasp of history. Louis is vile. This was a different more glorious time and it is shown in all its brutal magnificence. Louis has magisterial influence but no charisma or force of personality. This is not epoch shaking but rather a pretentious mess.

Best Lines:
“We are all damned in this place.”

“And no more sadly for you.”

“Your father was a common man.”

“You pay nothing and do nothing.”

“What is a nothing doing at my court?”

“Free but not unwatched.”

“They will kill us for it.”

Unforgotten 1x02
Bernard Hill and Trevor Eve star in this series. 39 years have passed since the victim died. The Lord (Eve) is awful to his son. The house where the bones were found was once a hostel. The female cop is mortally bound to find the killer. No psychologically soothing things happen. The cop learns the dead man’s sad backstory and sees his bedroom frozen in time. The Lord is obviously an Alan Sugar knockoff and there are hints he was involved with some nasty bastard crime family.

The wheelchair bound old man and his dotty wife have issues. The cop will not let go of this. There are 70s era social issues. A woman hides her skinhead past. The Vicar (Hill) is a thief. The Lord lies to the cops and is obviously the sort of person who’d shoot the first person who stopped applauding him.

Best Lines:
“I had to get my brother and his mates round in the end to chuck em out.”

“All the life we’ve lived.”

“What’s the point of you?”

“The last nice thing he ever did.”

“Then one day the letters just stopped.”

“The youtube.”

“Pretty horrible stuff.”

“It’s happened again.”

“I don’t know how this man is in her house.”