May 5th, 2015


Trailers, Quotes and Stuff

‘Big Game’ TV spot

‘The Enfield Haunting’ 1x02 promo

‘A Royal Night Out’ TV spot

‘Gamer’ (2009) promo

‘S1m0ne’ (2002) promo

‘Suspect’ (1987) promo

‘The Age Of Adeline’ promo

There’s an upcoming ‘Arrow’ novel. I hope Tommy is in it.

Anyone recall Sticky Bricks?

Sparkling Lychee drink - divine.
Spiced Chocolate slice - nice.

RIP Ruth Rendell - I can recall ‘An Unkindness Of Ravens’.

‘Arbella: England’s Lost Queen’ Quotes:
“When I see her enraged against any person whatever, I wish myself in Calcutta.”

“Whose unburied body still lay stinking at Fotheringay.”

“Elizabeth could not endure closed windows.”

“If you were in the habit of seeing such things in your bed as I do when in mine, you would not persuade me to go there.”

‘The Sunday Business Post’ Quotes:
“Couturial oeuvre.”

“Fantastically expensive, ostentatious shoes.”

“Delves unrelentingly.”

“An ugly emphasis.”

“Focus all her attention on her.”

“With a similarly arboreal name.”

“Emotionally direct.”

“Much of the acting could hardly be described as subtle.”

“Mind-boggling utterance.”

“In any terms that we can understand it.”

‘The Sunday Times’ Quotes:
“Down-below deforestation.”


“Thought counsels.”


“Then one day the sex wears off and they wake up and realise they’ve married a Romanian hooker.”

“Cracking up, mid-20th-century-style.”

“Clearly worked on.”

“Trust-fund wurzels.”

“Concocted mythology.”

“Quiet, disengaged, soulful thug.”

“The romanticising of ignorance.”

“The unlikely secret coupling of a widowed French princess and her Welsh servant during the late 1420s.”

“I wasn’t particularly good at anything.”

“Misplaced the late Renaissance by one decade.”

“There is no shortage of sea here.”

“Where are your clothes?”

“Sense of responsibility to society.”

“A look of frozen disapproval.”

“Doesn’t lactate human kindness.”

‘The Sunday Telegraph’ Quotes:
“The most ghastly inexorable sense.”

“Relatively insignificant.”

“Untether him from this excessive adulation of his mother.”

“Wholly unprepared.”

“I am not stopping. My wife spends all my money, so I can’t.”

“Every time I get the urge to have a hobby, I lie down till it passes.”

“Inarticulate, awful fashion sense, penchant for kicking Argentineans.”

“A demonically gleeful expression.”

“Oozes likeability and charisma.”

“Some wasted girls.”

“Now it looks and smells like a garbage can.”

“Trust and safety team.”

“There was vomit on the walls, condoms and women’s underwear on the stairs, broken glass and crockery everywhere, barbecue sauce all over the ceilings and a foul stench in the air.”

“Been a wrong’un all his life.”

“Like a slap with a dead fish in your face.”

“Your hair is a pile of Brillo.”

“Uproariously mocked.”

“Never do a soap opera.”

‘Financial Times’ Quote:
“Sheep dung kept getting skewered on the girls’ stilettos.”

‘The Simpsons’ Quotes:
“The long forgotten world of six years ago.”

“Don’t waste beer.”

“We get it. It’s just not funny.”

“Starfish head!”

“The other is dim and evil.”

“Our kids are nuts.”

“Me, seagull. You, boardwalk trashcan.”

“Sailor talk.”

“Her body usually whistles.”

“Bart and Lisa in ‘criminal neglect’.”

“Our rotten kids.”

“Your brother is stupid.”

“I have a teaching fist.”

“I’m crying out my nose.”

“You’re a psychic now?”

“You love sucking ghouls.”

“Parents not horrible.”

“Where daddy peed.”

‘Dr Phil’ Quotes:
“A toxic relationship.”

“Does absolutely nothing.”

“How do you forget to feed a special needs child?”

“I’m selling narcotics.”

“You’re a dealer?”

“I’m unconvinced with your resolve.”

“Don’t say no.”

“All this abusive stuff.”

“You have way overstepped your bounds.”

“Don’t go there!”

“She wasn’t given, she was taken.”

“Seed of deception.”

“Negotiation window never closes.”

“Nobody’s taking care of me!”

“Rich people moocher.”

‘The Irish Times’ Quote:
“There is not one respectable house in this town.”

Films I Disliked: ‘Dragnet’ (1987), ‘Bell, Book And Candle’ (1958), ‘Rising Son’ (1993), ‘Frailty’ (2001), ‘Empire Of The Sun’ (1987), ‘Click’ (2006), ‘The Break-Up’ (2006), ‘Solider’ (1998) and ‘All About Eve’ (1950).
To Light The Way To Bed

Book Reviews: Original Sins + Prophecies + Mall Purchase Night + Unravelling Oliver

Buffy The Vampire Slayer: The Lost Slayer part 4 Original Sins by Christopher Golden
‘Borrowing’ from Stephen King and John Saul, TPTB released a serial novel in 2001. It dealt with time travel and an AU where Giles is the vampire king and Faith is dead. Buffy eats bitterness and stews in her helpless isolation. People die and yap. I felt distain for this.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer: The Lost Slayer part 1 Prophecies by Christopher Golden
This 2001 novel stymies all effort at interest. Every single twitching character is repugnant. This was another failed ‘BTVS’ novel like ‘Halloween Rain’, ‘Coyote Moon’, ‘Night Of The Living Rerun’, ‘Blooded’, ‘Visitors’, ‘Unnatural Selection’, ‘The Power Of Persuasion’, ‘Deep Water’, ‘Here Be Monsters’, ‘Ghoul Trouble’, ‘The Doomsday Deck’, ‘Child Of The Hunt’, ‘Return To Chaos’, ‘The Gateway Trilogy’, ‘Obsidian Fate’, ‘Immortal’, ‘Sins Of The Father’, ‘Resurrecting Ravana’, ‘Prime Evil’, ‘The Essential Angel’, ‘The Sunnydale High Yearbook’, ‘The Angel Chronicles’, ‘The Xander Years’, ‘How I Survived My Summer Vacation Vol 1’, ‘Tales Of The Slayers’, ‘The Evil That Men Do’, ‘Paleo’, ‘Spike And Dru: Pretty Maids All In A Row’, ‘Revenant’, ‘The Book Of Fours’ and ‘The Unseen Trilogy’.

Mall Purchase Night by Rick Cook
This 1993 novel is a really dated tale of an ex-cop who gets a job as a security guard at a mall. But the mall is located close to Elfland and the owner is having a moral collapse. Various thick-witted characters walk around talking in dated opaque banalities. I felt disappointed distain for this tale of mall rats, drug dealers and pixies which isn’t as funny as it thinks it is.

Best Line:
“Who’s now in a mental hospital doing an imitation of a turnip.”

Unravelling Oliver by Liz Nugent
Beloved and respected author Oliver Ryan beats his self-sacrificing wife into a coma from which she will never recover. Nobody can understand how it came to this. Oliver tells his story as do those people whose lives intertwined with his over five decades. Over the course of this short novel, Oliver is shown not to be honest and dependable but rather an exploiter and a liar who isn’t well-remembered by those he was contemporaneous with. This was an excellent short savage tale of an awful man.

Best Lines:
“Go away, you stupid irritating woman.”

“Although I should not have done it, she really should not have provoked me.”

“Complained continually of feeling tired and excluded.”

“The fuss that ensued was unwarranted in my opinion.”

“I could not live with this kind of disturbance.”

“That he would be unwise to ever visit again.”

“She only ever saw the good in people. Even her husband.”

“He seems relived that I am gone.”

“What about love?”
“I thought that was love.”

“Writing is boring.”

EnfieldHaunting1x01 +AgentsofSHIELD2x19 +Person Of Interest 3x19 + Gotham1x14 +Stalker1x17 Reviewed

The Enfield Haunting (2015) 1x01
This Sky Living three-parter promised us the macabre, the spooky and the downright nasty. It did not deliver. This is inspired by real life events and is based on the book ‘This House Is Haunted‘ by Guy Playfair. It is 1977 and a not very articulate mother has barely concealed contempt for her children. Then it seems a cruel force of nature is haunting their council house leading to hysterical extremes. Reporters and parapsychologists show up.

This was rather ghastly and had no defining scenes. The kids (who may be behind the ‘haunting’) are insurmountably annoying and the mother is manic. This had no rhythm and structure. I don’t have the perseverance to stick it out for two more episodes. The ‘ghost’ seems implacably hostile as a believer and a sceptic (Playfair) from the SPR prance around. Playfair has a dismissive side to his character and is not overburdened with modesty.

Best Lines:
“That’s not my hand.”

“One thing I know is trajectories.”

“Marble behaves oddly.”

“What money?”

“It’s not supposed to do that.”

“Such wide-eyed innocence - that of course I was instantly sceptical.”

“Vomit up far worse things than a frog.”

The Dirty Half-Dozen
Raina dreams, Cal is all disgust and spite and the bucolic tranquillity of the Inhumans won’t last. Coulson smugs and is pure egotism. SHIELD recall that Hydra exists. What’s in the ship’s cargo hold? I feel such a dislike for Coulson and his grudge holding. He needs to take a step back. I have no use for him. TPTB waste Edward James Olmos. Fitz was the lead actor in the crappy ’The Fades!

Lincoln has been captured. There is bad acting. Skye’s mother is immoral. Hydra has a merciless agenda. Nobody tried to rescue Kara. Ward’s back in the gang - all terrible togetherness. Simmons is all indiscriminate rage and plots to murder Ward. Fitz is exuberantly off-centre. May and Coulson are anathema to each other. Skye is an ass. SHIELD isn’t affable. TPTB try to mock criticism they’ve got. This was unbearably banal.

Fitz, Simmons and Skye are waster brats. Ward isn’t emotionally thoughtful. SHIELD is incomparably awful people who are instinctively hostile and full of vindictiveness. Cal is all poisonous absurdity and all the characters are rather unpleasant. Raina annoys. Hunter and his monosyllabic responses needs to go away. Everyone is easily forgiven except Ward. Mockingbird suddenly cares about Kara. There is a lame ‘Age Of Ultron’ tie-in. The Bus is blown up, yay! There is death and Simmons is an idiot. What is Ward up to? Coulson is a jerk looking for ego-balm. This was terrible.

Best Lines:
“We remain sceptical.”

“No more Ward.”

“He’s like Candyman.”

“Mistakes were made.”
“By you.”
“And people got hurt.”
“By you.”

“You need to watch her.”

“Not if we want Hydra to believe we’re debris.”

“What are we discussing now?”

“Consequences are upon us.”

“I’m disappointed in you.”

Most Likely To...
Vigilance kills a POI. Root annoys. The beached whale woman impedes interest. Reese and Shaw head to a 20 year high school reunion where Matthew Reed (Nestor Carbonell of ‘Lost’) is on a devil’s errand. It all leads back to his girlfriend who died in 1994. Matthew stares and broods and smoothes. Vigilance attack, Reed is kind of psycho and this was good. What is happening to the machine?

Best Lines:
“Died a very theatrical death.”

“AC/DC or The Dixie Chicks?”

“Suburban high school hell.”

“You’re the mattress king.”

“Bulky sweaters and beer guts.”

“You’ll do some loud typing.”

“You’re both like scary ninjas.”

“An ass-hair away.”

“Your diabolical high school grudge fest.”

The Fearsome Dr Crane
Fish tells Maroni that Penguin is Falcone’s mole. Cat-teen annoys and needs a slap. Bruce is smug and needs a beating. Alfred is a jerk and Bruce is an ass who can’t act. A nutter named Todd (Julian Sands) kills people who have phobias. Penguin has anxiety. Gordon and Leslie hook up. Maroni plans for a road trip with Penguin to not end well. Ed gets weirder. Penguin escapes a death-trap. Todd is the father of Jonathan Crane! This was bad with a ridic cliffhanger.

Best Lines:
“Either dead or extremely unwell.”

“I’m a hole.”

“Can I show you the door?”

“Stabbed like ten times.”
“I don’t recall the exact number.”

“Get your hand out of that corpse. Now.”

“This gibbering loon.”

“Used to be longer.”

“A different and troubling light.”

“Whatever comes out I send to Falcone.”

“Inevitable retaliation.”

“How did I ever fall for your crap?”

“Shut up and take it like a man!”

“That’s cold.”

“This is one weird dude.”

Fun And Games
The krankie was a controlling ‘great guy’ who fooled Beth’s family and burnt her house down. I feel disengaged and inattentive to this show. Perry is daft as a brush. Beth cracks up. Her pal is in peril. Ugly depths are plunged in this futile ep. Beth is kicked out of her job and replaced with a federal agent (Mira Sorvino). There is stupidity, death, Ben the boring one is shot and Beth is in peril.

Best Lines:
“That judgy face.”

“Spring me out of the crazy house.”

“Crazy suit people.”

“I misjudged the situation.”