November 27th, 2014

Hawkeye

Trailers, Quotes and Stuff

‘The Flash’ 1x08 promo
I want the Arrow to kick Barry’s ass.

‘Agent Carter’ promo
She fights a guy with a stapler and it is an ‘8-part television event’?!?

‘Agent Carter’ promo 2
Ray Wise, a big red hat and a blonde wig. Mmmm.

George Eads has left ‘CSI’, again. So how about a ‘Savannah’ reboot George?

What is the ‘Sherlock’ 2015 Christmas special about?

‘Constantine’ is cancelled? Ha ha ha ha ha.

Christmas horror movie ‘Krampus’ sounds weird.

Read the Robert Picardo gossip, I laughed.

I will review ‘No One Gets Out Alive’, ‘Two Hundred and Twenty One Baker Streets’, ‘Ghostmaker’, ‘Eclipse’ and ‘Target’.

Reviews of ‘Dreams of the Golden Age’ and ‘Cthulhu Cymrag’ delayed whilst I won’t be reading ‘Hardship’ or ‘Damnation’.

Chocolate Buttercream cupcake - nice.

On ‘Neighbours’: Kyle’s deadbeat dad shows up, has a good cry and leaves again. Brad must have cognitive impairment; he alienates Terese more and steadfastly fails to check back into his marriage. Brad is useless and thick. Terese decides to leave and move into Paul‘s hotel. Imogen being thick like her dad fails to notice. It’s all Paige’s fault.

Best Line:
“You mess with the pig, you get the tusks.”

On ‘Hollyoaks’: Jason’s issues bore. Dennis and Blessing left by running off to the seaside. Cameron’s ‘old friend’ Shane shows up. Leela wears hot pants in November in a church. Holly has a Katniss side braid. Rick is rough around the edges. Diane and Tony are bound in unholy matrimony. Kim doubts Freddie. Lindsey is pathetic. Tony calls Sinead trampy. Diane shames Tony and Sinead at the reception and plans a money grab divorce.
Scary Books

Movie Review: Jug Face (2013)

Also known as ‘The Pit’, this indie horror has an animated opening about how a small backwoods community became worshippers of some eldritch abomination in a pit. There is nudity, pottery, sex, visions and a pervasiveness of uneasy dereliction. Ada (Lauren Ashley Carter) doesn’t want to be joined at the next full moon to the local idiot Bodey, she wants to be with the local hottie Jessaby (Daniel Manche).

Ada and her careworn melancholy lies, avoids obligations, is ungracious and has a smart, surly mouth. But the Pit must be fed, no matter what she wants. This is a good rural horror. The community have their ways, do laundry in the creek, eat roadkill, chug moonshine and Ada’s mother Loriss (Sean Young) overacts wildly. Ada’s lies get people killed and Loriss ratchets up her crazy abusiveness full tilt and is strenuously awful. Ada’s pa Sustin (Larry Fessenden) is affable but the exploitative nature of the community causes things to escalate dramatically.

Sexuality is policed, things have been done this way since the pox, intestines are ripped out, ghosts wander, blood sacrifice is carried out and the people in the nearby town like the storekeeper (Chip Ramsey) suspect but don’t want to know. Ada stands idly by but the cost of going against the prevailing attitude is too high. There is tragedy, a moment or two of black comedy and general bleakness. This is bizarre and enjoyable even if it is only 77 minutes long.

Best Lines:
“May I go to the Pit? I’d like to pray on it.”

“That’s the way it is, you best get used to it.”

“You dripping then?”

“I thank the Pit with all my heart for making it so.”

“No biting!”

“Pack of three.”
“Make em last.”

“The Pit ain’t spoken to you at all?”

“Get em off.”

“My daughter’s going to wander these woods, shunned forever.”

“The Pit has spoken.”

“Let it be known.”

“You’re one of the shunned.”

“I forgave, but they did not.”

“The sacrifice didn’t take?”

“Who else’s would it be?”

“Is what you say true?”

“Woman shut your mouth and let me think!”

“Why are you still alive?”