February 25th, 2014

Scary Books

King’s Watch #4 Reviewed

Ming invades Earth, the not quite Defenders of the Earth fight him off for now and Mandrake and the Phantom mock Flash’s IQ. This was okay fun.

Best Lines:
“The better to learn the rich culture of Mongo, and stop wasting time with your own.”

“I am Ming. I am merciless.”

“I want a cave!”
“I hope you like bat poop then.”
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Scary Books

The Musketeers 1x05 + Falling Skies 2x01&2x02 Reviewed

The Homecoming
Porthos wakes up alone in a muddy street next to a body. He’s in trouble. Captain Treville (who looks like Eddie Izzard) is ever useless. Porthos supplies more of his back-story, there is Renaissance CSI, a plot by a bankrupt noble and some annoying old friends of Porthos’ show up. There is a nasty judge, Porthos hides out in the Court Of Miracles, sinister minister Richelieu plans a march of progress, Louis XIII is a moron and Athos broods. There is an annoying harlot, jealously, Huguenots, betrayal, greed, a land grab and no Constance or Milady. This was not good.

Best Lines:
“How old are you?”
“No idea.”

“They remain strongly attached to their depravity.”

“Is it raining musketeers outside?”

“Where did you serve?”
“Too many hellholes to recall.”

“Leave now, I won’t come looking.”

World’s Apart
3 months after Tom’s ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind’ stupidity, he shows up and promptly gets shot by Ben. We get flashbacks to his alien encounter but there is no reason given as to why they attacked. Also the aliens make it clear they aren’t interested in negotiating. Then they dumped Tom off near the ruins of Michigan and he had to walk back to the 2nd Mass. Hal is a jerk. Tom meets another idiot survivor heading for the looming gutter. This was goodish, Pope has suspicions about Tom.

Best Lines:
“It’s time to face facts. They’ve won.”

“I’m old enough to fight.”

“Not the Harley!”

“This was never a negotiation.”

Shall We Gather At The River
This show has become grittier and edgier. Tom has an alien stalker. The 2nd Mass is cut off by a river and they need to get across but the aliens have blown all the bridges. Tom doesn’t trust himself and maybe he’s right not too. Where does the 2nd Mass get motorcycle fuel? The aliens dropped neutron bombs? Hal calls the aliens fish-heads. Tom twitches and bleeds from the eye. There is some alien tech in his eye.

Ben scouts, Pope makes some good points about Tom but nobody listens because he is Pope but Tom has had a sudden fall from grace and favour in his eyes. Ben’s implant is getting worse, Anne has to do some gruesome eye surgery on Tom, the 2nd Mass has a photography studio apparently but not security for the alien eye tech. The alien attack and this was okay.

Best Lines:
“Dylan’s alive. He’s holed up in a mine shaft in Minnesota rewriting all his protest songs into war ballads.”

“Figured he’s give us all an oral history of alien-interrogation techniques, but all we got is brooding silence.”

“Be thankful that we need you and your band of degenerates. For now.”
Scary Books

Trailers, Quotes and a 2005 Tape Tale

‘The Musketeers’ 1x06 promo
Louis XIII’s awful mother shows up. Maybe this will be good.

‘A New York Winter’s Tale’ promo
No, just no.

‘Heroes’ is being brought back as a mini-series in 2015? Oh hell no.

Saw a documentary on the James Hunt/Niki Lauda F1 1970s rivalry, now I want to see ‘Rush’.

I’ve given up on ‘Modern Family’.

I am reading ‘The Mammoth Book of the Lost Chronicles of Sherlock Holmes’.

‘My Family’ Quote:
“You’re a horrible, horrible man and a terrible father.”

‘Eastenders’ Quote:
“Maybe is a really big word.”

‘Modern Family’ Quotes:
“I can’t be in a house with snakes!”

“Hayley’s doing something for money in the basement.”

On ‘Hollyoaks’: Jason is a twit, John-Paul’s ugly secret has eaten him alive and now he faces jail for beating up Robbie. Diane suspects Sinead may be faking Katy’s illness. Lindsey is glared at by Freddie. Finn gloats to Robbie about what he did to John-Paul. Robbie lies in hospital attention seeking; he’s what went wrong with the Roscoe family. Finn is so so wrong as he says that if Robbie tells on him, he’ll rape Robbie too.  There is the mark of the devil on Finn and Sinead. Diane is the dumb one not to notice her stepchildren are monsters. John-Paul has been pushed to the limit and seems to be catatonic; he should have gone murdery on Robbie. Darren moves on with Leela. Sam is the only cop in Chester. Danny is creepy. Lindsey tries to justify herself to Freddie. Where is Trevor? Dennis forgets the dead Leanne to hang out with Blessing. Sam gets the wrong idea about the bed blocking Robbie. John-Paul remembers he has a son. Where is Craig?

Best Lines:
“John-Paul went mental in school.”

“McQueen went psycho and started throwing punches.”

“I’d like to make a complaint actually.”

Cleared out a tape from 2005. It began with a ‘Stargate Atlantis’ ep ‘Conversion’ in which Sheppard begins to physically transform into a Wraith. This was sadly dull.

Best Line:
“That’s dead man talk.”

Then came a season 1 ‘Prison Break’ ep ‘Cute Poison’ in which Michael and Linc are intelligent, traits they‘d lost by season 4. Veronica annoys. Michael had two toes cut off in a previous episode, something that would be forgotten by season 4. Also his voice sounds wildly different than it did by season 4. Linc urges Veronica to contact Project Justice. Bellick is a jerkass. Michael brews a chemical compound to melt pipes or something. Haywire guesses what Michael’s tattoo is all about so Michael manipulates and sets up Haywire. Nick the cute and doomed Project Justice lawyer debuts. Michael gets all Shawshank behind the toilet in his cell in Fox River. This was a showcase of the show’s lost potential.

Best Line:
“I believe that’s what it says on your mission statement in the lobby.”

Then came a ‘CSI: Miami’ ep ‘Slow Burn’ in which Caine is the angry old man crime solver. A sleazy abuser (Joe Flanigan) starts fires and abuses his girlfriend. His violent psychosis does not put off his girlfriend, Caine looks sad at the certain kind of crazy of display. So dull.

Best Lines:
“You chased her into the glades didn’t you?”
“Yeah. But not very far.”

Then came a ‘Battlestar Galactica’ ep ‘Final Cut’ in which a really annoying reporter does radical-chic exposes of the military. The whining ungrateful civilians ignore those who saved their lives and the ‘reporters’ should get a real job. Tigh and his wife bore. Adama wants the reporter Diana (Lucy Lawless) to make an empirical record of the military. Starbuck annoys, Lee annoys, Kat is a stim addict, Baltar twitches and there is lots of screaming and yelling. Adama is unbaitable, the stupid cylon baby attracts attention and this was filler. Diana of Fleet News Service is a cylon, well duh. This was as awful as Shakira’s take on ‘Love is a Battlefield’.

Best Lines:
“More fallout from Tigh’s moment of glory.”

“I hardly recognised you with your clothes on.”

“We lost two raiders relaying the images back to the fleet.”
To Light The Way To Bed

Book Review: Divergent

Divergent by Veronica Roth
This is another dystopian trilogy. Beatrice lives in a divided society. After some unexplained disaster, society divided into factions and now it is time for her to choose her faction. Beatrice leaves behind the Abnegation faction into which she was born and where she lived a life of silent, resentful obedience for the dangerous and exciting Dauntless faction.

In her brutal new life she will learn that she can be strong, brave and capable of great cruelty. And she likes it. She also learns that there is much about her society and the factions that she does not know. This is a good dark tale of a broken society. The world building does not make much sense, but that is the point. Something is very wrong with Beatrice’s world, she just does not yet know how wrong. I will read the sequels ‘Insurgent’ and ‘Allegiant’.

Best Lines:
“What are we guarding the city from?”

“Why would they lock the gate from the outside and not the inside? It almost seems like they don’t want to keep something out; they want to keep us in.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be important or something?”

“It made me wonder what the Erudite are doing that requires night light.”

“They will catch me. Please don’t catch me.”
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