July 27th, 2013


Trailers, Quotes and Stuff

‘Under The Dome’ 1x06 promo
What happens when we run out of everything?” Sigh.

‘Gravity’ trailer
Sandra Bullock and George Clooney are astronauts whose shuttle is destroyed and they’re stranded in space and cut off from Houston. What shuttle? Obama killed the space programme. Apart from that, this looks creepy.

‘Chickens’ promo
A comedy about WW1. WTF?

Best Line:
“If you were really keen to help, you’d have killed yourself to raise morale.”

‘Delta House’ (1979) opening credits
John Vernon, Stephen Furst and Bruce McGill starred in this sitcom spin-off from ’National Lampoon’s Animal House’. One question was never answered: how did these morons get into college? Looks amusing.

Lemonade = delicious.
Peaches = yum.
Pancakes with maple syrup = yum.
Almond and Orange Dark choc = yum.
Passion fruit choc = weird.
Biscotti biscuits = okay.
I made the no-churn coffee ice cream and its okay.

‘Castle’ Quotes:
“Could you please die a little bit more quietly?”

“Maybe she has a nice murder to distract you.”

“Mr Randolph’s life was like his death: vulgar.”

‘Don’t Trust The B---- In Apartment 23’ Quotes:
“One day you are going to far so deep down your lie hole, you’re not going to be able to get out.”

“He had to go, he saw John Goodman.”

“Lies eat your heart.”

“Grandma would have wanted me to have her rings if she were lucid.”

“June’s mom gave me tea.”
“With messed up radish people on the box!”

‘Life on the Preservation’ Quote:
“Wanderers did occasionally straggle into Oakdale but they tended to straggle right back out again.”

On ‘Hollyoaks’, Dodger and Sandy Roscoe are a couple. Wasn’t he screaming about his lost love Texas less than a week ago? Sinead stomps around the village in ho-wear. Ruby claims she, Sinead, Tilly and Esther are all friends. Did 2012 happen?!?!

I am reading ‘Life on the Preservation’.
Scary Books

The Day After part 3 + Supernatural 8x07&8x08 Reviewed

The Day After (1983) part 3
The farmer has left his irradiated dog outside to die yet when a stranger named Steven shows up, he lets him in. The farmer’s idiot daughter Jolene whines. Meanwhile the doctor does surgery via torchlight as instruments are boiled in a pan. Fake looking radiation burns are everywhere and cities are dead. This was sanitised and overacted.

There is hysteria, one of the farmer’s idiot family runs outside for a romp around fallout covered fields ignoring the dead animals and birds. The hospital is chaotic but there is no nuclear winter in this. A man hits a church bell with a rock and has a service in a ruined church giving a deranged sermon about: “Destroying the destroyers of the Earth.”

Survivors sitting around in piles of rubble listen to a radio broadcast which states a ceasefire is in place due to cataclysmic damage. One of the survivors is Stephen Furst of ‘St Elsewhere’, ‘National Lampoon’s Animal House’, ’National Lampoon’s Class Reunion’ and ‘Babylon 5’.

Reconstruction is attempted with talk of decontaminating fields and removing topsoil. Which begs the question: what are the survivors eating? This was okay, better than ‘When The Wind Blows’ that’s for sure.

Best Lines:
“It’ll never be safe.”

“Is anybody there? Anybody at all?”

“It smells so bad down here.”

“What do you thinks gonna happen out there? You think we’re gonna sweep up the dead and fill in a couple of holes and build some supermarkets?”

“We knew this could happen for 40 years.”

“Lucky to be alive.”
“We’ll see how lucky that is.”

“There has been no surrender, no retreat.”

“He said he didn’t know how they were going to fight World War III. But he knew how they would fight world War IV: with sticks and stones.”

“We’re talking catastrophe here.”

A Little Slice of Kevin
Why doesn’t Sam just leave as he is always threatening to? Castiel is back but Destiel will never happen. Crowley menaces. Did Sam have a personality overhaul that allowed to not to bother looking for Dean? Kevin and Mrs Tran are in trouble again. A witch is hired off craigslist and is a baddie.

There are more endless flashbacks. TPTB do know that their show is no ‘Lost’ and it isn’t 2004 anymore right? Chuck is casually mentioned as being dead. Crowley realises there are more tablets. Dean wails, Castiel blubbers and I remember those old ‘Prophecy’ movies. A new baddie Naomi (Amanda Tapping of ‘SG1’ and ‘Sanctuary’) yaps and this was deadly dull.

Best Lines:
“I’m quaking, really.”

“I lied. I do that.”

“You’ve got to stop drowning me in holy water every time I go out. I’m not possessed.”
“Not yet. Not now.”

“Talk about the dumbing down of America.”

“Don’t provoke me Kevin, you still have nine fingers.”

“Madman or megalomaniac?”

Hunteri Heroici
Dean’s drinking problem remains unaddressed. Castiel decides to be a hunter. Sam needs to cut his hair. People die via cartoon like ways. Sam has more boring flashbacks to Amelia. These bizarrely tinted flashbacks show how he bought a house and met her father (Brian Markinson of ‘Continuum’) and how he whined about being alone. Castiel overacts and analyses Roadrunner. Reality is warped by yet another old friend of John Winchester’s. A cat talks. There was bad acting and bad green screen. Sam was a jerk. What was so special about Amelia? Why didn’t he look for Dean? This was crap.

Best Lines:
“His heart was ejected from his body.”

“An ass load of drugs.”

“Stop smelling the dead guy.”

“Does the crazy chase you?”

“This whole mysterious resurrection thing.”

“There was a pastry mishap.”

“We’ll have a slumber party and braid Sam’s hair.”
To Light The Way To Bed

Book Reviews: City of Ashes + Burdens of the Dead

The Mortal Instruments Book Two: City of Ashes by Cassandra Clare
Clary and her long lost brother Jace try to cope with their mutual attraction and the fact that their long lost father Valentine is a genocidal rogue Shadowhunter. This was a good entertaining urban fantasy as monster hunters, werewolves, vampires, fairies and an OTT warlock have adventures in a shadowy New York.

Best Lines:
“Who wants to do me?”
“A regrettable choice of words,”

“How convenient. Everyone’s either unconscious or apparently delirious.”

“Just as you were children when the Circle plotted the destruction of the Clave?”

“This is all going to be very hard to explain to my mom,”

“I thought I’d lie on the floor and writhe in pain for a while,”

“She just throws things against the door and screams. She said that if I came in she’d jump out the window.”

“All his insides fell out. And then they started eating.”

“I can kind of see why she hates you.”

“You’re obviously psychotic.”

“I should have killed him myself. It would have showed that I cared.”

“Nothing good ever starts with the words ‘Valentine said’.”

Burdens of The Dead by Mercedes Lackey Eric Flint Dave Freer
This is the latest in the ‘Heirs of Alexandria’ series after ‘The Shadow of the Lion’, ‘This Rough Magic’, ‘A Mankind Witch’ and ‘Much Fall of Blood’ and it is a boring disappointment. The previous four novels were dense, rich, massive, brilliant alternate history novels. This is a dull tale with easily defeated baddies, the large cast of characters is severely trimmed down and there are ass pull plot resolutions.

Lackey seems to have written more of this than Flint or Freer. Even the big bad - the Chernobog possessed Grand Duke Jagiellon comes across as a cut rate Doctor Doom and not the unholy monster he was in previous books. This was a disappointing utter letdown. Where are the religious schisms? The multiple plot strands? Why are Kat and Marco so wet, stupid and boring? Why is Benito hanging out with the grandfather who left him and his half brother to die in a swamp?

Best Lines:
“He was also dead, long dead, and the passage of time had not improved him.”

“Waving a sword around with grave danger to his cheering comrades.”

“Poseidon seems to have fathered kids on nearly everything that breathed."
“Oh, he wasn’t fussy about them breathing.”