September 5th, 2012

Scary Books

Quotes of the Day + a 2002 Tape Tale

I am reading ‘The Grass King’s Concubine’.

‘Inside’ trailer

‘Tower Prep’ trailer

RIP Michael Clarke Duncan of ‘The Scorpion King’ and ‘Daredevil’.

Raising Hope’ Quotes:
“He’s getting frustrated again, bring the sugar.”

“Dude did you not heed the restraining order? Stop talking to me and change your clothes. You’re embarrassing an entire movement.”

“If Jimmy Chance should die in a gutter, drowning in a puddle of his own sick...”

“We have worked way too hard to keep Sabrina from finding out how stupid you are.”

“We’re too stupid to even think of a question.”

“That’s one of Jimmy’s smart books.”

“Math and science which will be very important in your careers whether it’s making change or making meth.”

“You’re the child of two morons.”

The Sweeny’ (2012) quote:
“Put your trousers on, you’re nicked.”

Cleared out a tape from 2002. It opened with a season 7 ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer’ ep ‘Same Time, Same Place’ in which there are laboured references to Xander’s infamous yellow crayon speech and a skin eating demon shows up. This is all meant to make us pity Willow and forgive her so she gets away with her crap yet again. This bored.

Then came a season 4 ‘Angel’ ep ‘Ground State’ which debuted Gwen. She would naturally vanish from the show by season 5. This was boring padding with stupid Wesley stuff and Fred thinking Connor needs: “Corporeal punishment with a large heavy mallet.”

Best Line:
“Banished to the ocean depths by your ungrateful snot of a son.”

Then came the season 7 ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer’ ep ‘Help’ in which Willow visits Tara’s grave but no one else really cares as they obsess over Cassie who says she’ll be dead soon. Buffy and co care more about the doomed Cassie than Tara. This was so bad, it made me miss ‘Mile High’.

Best Line:
“Poems: always a sign of pretentious inner turmoil.”

Finally there was the ‘Angel’ season 4 ep ‘The House Always Wins’ in which the gang visit Las Vegas, the baddie of the week is a former star of ‘G vs E’ and Cordelia shows up. This was bad.
Scary Books

Book Review: Besieged

Besieged: Book One of The Outcast Chronicles by Rowena Cory Daniells

From the author of ‘The Chronicles of King Rolen’s Kin’ comes this book which kicks off a new trilogy. It is set in a world where true-men hate the wyrd mystical T’En. The T’En hate true-men in return and are also riven by conflict as the men of the Brotherhoods and the women of the Sisterhoods distrust each other.

Years pass as Sorne the rejected T’En son of a true-man King plots to regain what was denied him. Meanwhile T’En Imoshen battles against the staid static Sisterhood life. Conflict is coming. This is a wannabe epic. It is overly complicated, over written and characters are idiots for the sake of being idiots.

I don’t care about any of these people. No spiritual truths are illuminated, the T’En theology is not rich or compelling just bog standard fantasy novel magic. The T’En are mostly arrogant ingrates with no appreciation of or interest in anything beyond their narrow bubble. Most T’En seem to have serious behavioural disorders and psychopathic traits. This was an utter disappointment.

Best Line:
“I hate it. I wish we’d never come here. This place corrupts.”
Scary Books

A Mother's Son part 2 +True Blood 4x09 +Revenge 1x20&1x21 Reviewed

A Mother’s Son (2012) Part 2

Rosie has tunnel vision and whines. David can’t believe Jamie is guilty. Lorraine read the ’Twilight’ novels, oddly appropriate. Rosie needs the family need to talk about Jamie and tells Ben her suspicions about the violent aggressive Jamie.

Things go to hell as Rosie continues to be in denial and jealous of Ben’s dead wife, Jamie lies and only Ben can see what needs to be done. This was not as good as part 1, mostly due to Rosie’s shrieking. The ending is idiotic and sappy.

Let’s Get Out Of Here

Sookie’s gunshot wound goes away. Sam and Luna bore. Debbie unravels. Jessica wails. Bill and Nan yell at each other. The possessed Lafayette strolls around Hoyt’s house. Sookie has a boring dream about Bill and Eric. The show’s flaws catch up with it in this awful ep.

Andy trips on V. The plot is ridiculous and full of bad acting. Hoyt puts Jessica’s stuff (including her copy of ‘Twilight’) into a box with ‘For you monster’ written on it. Jessica and Jason get it on. Tommy pulls his usual crap. The tolerance thing goes awry. This was utterly bad.


A flashback to 2002 shows how Amanda was set on her path for revenge instead of just being violent and destructive. Conrad got a menacing note and he did his homosocial bonding with Frank to get to the bottom of the matter.

The cover up people gather at the Grayson mansion of a New Year’s Eve party - shouldn’t the party be in NY? Amanda wanders around, yet no-one recognised her when she returned as Emily Thorne. Jack dresses like it is the 90s and has a bad girlfriend. Declan is a kid and yet more flashbacks to 1991 show David Clarke wasn’t very bright.

Amanda meets Roger (John Billingsley of ‘Star Trek: Enterprise’) who was David’s friend who became a drunk as a result of guilt. He says he will help her and Frank kills him. Jack’s animosity to Nolan is explained. Lydia’s horribleness is shown in full. This was very good.

If David Clarke wanted his daughter to forgive why did he leave her the journals detailing the “ruthless betrayal” against him, detailing who was responsible and going into detail about how “a system rigged against me by the people I knew as friends” destroyed him. Are Amanda’s sugar tinted memories of her father accurate?

Best Lines:
“In the winters, it’s like ‘The Shining’ around here.”

“Want to know what I think?”
“No. But don’t let that stop you.”

“It’s perverse don’t you think? Destroy a man you love and then weep for him eternally.”

“Roger brought the drunkard out early this year. How droll."

“Frank be a good dog and fetch me a refill.”


David continues to be a ghastly person. Who are what is the Initiative? Emily plants a spy camera in a book called ’Orwell: The Biography’ so to quote ’The Cape’: Orwell is watching.

Charlotte snots, James Morrison lurks - one could presume he is playing the same character he did on ’Freedom’. Conrad and Lydia have set up a love nest. Nolan is stupid and wears another vile sweater. Daniel is jackass and disgusting. He indulges in pathetic intimidation and without his surname he’d be another delusional entry level twit who dreams of being an amoral sociopath CEO. Charlotte is trash and Sammy dies. This was okay.

Best Lines:
“Grief is a life sentence without clemency.”

“It’s a cheque, not a shoe bomb.”

“You look like a demonic succubus.”

“This is getting kinkier and creepier by the moment.”

“They’re awful Declan, my whole family.”

“A walking tabloid.”

“Grief is a merciless master.”
To Light The Way To Bed

Retro Review: Wolf Lake (2001 - 2002) 1x01+1x02

Meat The Parents

In the light of the moon, things are never what they seem.

This was a short lived TV show about cop John Kanin (Lou Diamond Phillips of ‘Stargate Universe’, ‘Numb3rs’, ‘The Big Hit’ and ‘The Triangle’) whose girlfriend Ruby (Mia Kirshner) goes missing. He quickly learns she is not who she claimed to be and tracks her to the town of Wolf Lake like an obsessed stalker as annoying music plays.

Wolf Lake is surrounded by a vast wolf filled forest perpetually surrounded in mist. The town itself has a lot of wolf motifs and is populated by weirdoes like the uninterested Sheriff Donner (Tim Matheson) and his spoilt brat daughter Sophia who is into local thug Luke Cates (Paul Wesley of ‘The Vampire Diaries’).

The Sherriff keeps lounge singer Miranda Deveraux (Kallie Waymire of ‘Star Trek: Enterprise’) either in a jail cell or shackled to a piano in a bar. Nothing creepy about that. Kanin meets Ruby’s parents Willard (Bruce McGill) and Vivian (Sharon Lawrence of ’Hidden Palms’) who are the big shots in Wolf Lake. Vivian is banging local drug dealer/big bad Tyler Creed (Scott Bairstow of ‘Killing Mr Griffin’) on the side.

Kanin gets drunk. Luke and other teenagers hang out being morons. There is wholesale ripping off of ‘Twin Peaks’. Kanin is chased and there is chanting about “Survival of the pack.” Yep, the townsfolk are all werewolves. This was bizarre but not as engrossing as ‘Hidden Palms’ which had scandal, suicide and murder. Some towns have all the fun.

Best Lines:
“You could always wait for the maid, course we’d have to hire one first.”

“Did I say I was leaving?”

“What we’ve got here is the enigmatic stranger.”

The Changing

A teenager girl is failing to complete her first werewolf transformation. The unimpressive opening credits debut. Kanin rants, he does that a lot. Luke and Sophia discuss transforming into a werewolf, she hasn’t done so yet. There is a creepy hospital and horrible teenage girls discussing transforming while eating an enormous amount of ribs.

Willard Cates is dying. The science teacher is all knowing. Miranda is for once not shackled to something and turns out to be a pill addict. Sophia annoys. Ruby appears. Kanin stumbles across a cemetery where all the dead are teenagers. He also learns about runes. This show has something, it was better than ‘Teen Wolf’ that is for sure.

There is a bizarre scene with slow motion, Willard ponders his successor, Sophia is obnoxious and Ruby looks out a window.

Best Lines:
“Get off this frequency or I’m calling your mother.”

“Went totally ‘Blair Witch’ running through the woods naked screaming her head off