The original 'Bring it On' was a horrible laugh free mess and this is equally horrible, equally laugh free and just as dull. It centres on two rival squads, the Sharks and the Jets, who compete at cheer camp. Rival cheerleaders Carson (blonde 4 foot nothing) and Penn (Felix from 'One Tree Hill') fall for each other. Only they are torn apart by idiot dialogue, bimbo team mates and the moronic plot. This was dull.
"My granny can jump higher than that! From her grave!"
'The Simpsons' Quotes:
"I'm not responsible for a horrible tragedy and I didn't do anything wrong by fleeing the scene and not reporting it and killing that hobo with the big mouth. I might have imagined that last part."
So 'Alcatraz' is being re-shot. Oh dear, another 'Six Degrees' then.
My holiday was good.
Had some glorious sour candy named 'Now & Later'.
'Fertile Ground' trailer
Nate goes crazy while his wife cowers. Maybe.
Morons hitchhike and bad stuff happens. No.
'The Task' trailer
A taste free reality show at a prison goes awry. This looks dumb beyond belief.
"Isn't it a rather vulgar sort of theft?"
"Yes, vulgar and not fit for a gentleman, but I can't help that. We're vulgarly hard up."
The Spoils of Sacrilege
Bunny oils Raffles' bats, runs errands for him, fetches and carries for him. Bunny whines that he never gets to do anything fun in the thieving department. Raffles points out that he is the one talented at cracking cribs and sort of implies that Bunny is gormless. So he and Bunny go to the Turkish baths where Bunny holds Raffles ashtray for him. Their banter is hilarious.
Bunny comes up with a plan to rob his old country home. The duo creep around Bunny's old home in evening dress, top hats and masks. Bunny's in charge of the theft which leads to the duo being chased by drunken fox hunters. Raffles abseils down a lightening conductor, still in full evening dress. Bunny accepts Raffles is the dominant one in their partnership. This was okay, Raffles has a nasty streak and this is so very homoerotic.
"You want to do more of the burgling?"
"I was talking to you."
"Oh, I'm sorry. Was it interesting?"
"Why should I want to do that?"
"Because you're a burglar."
"We did agree masks."
"Since your face is known in the neighbourhood and mine is not entirely unknown to readers of newspapers."
"There haven't got a cricket team in Wormwood Scrubs."
"There isn't any uproar."
The Gold Cup
Raffles and Bunny steal a gold cup that once belonged to King Henry VIII while wearing fake beards and using a bath chair. They smirk and sneak home via Baker Street. It is revealed that it is 1897. Afterwards the duo pose in evening dress under a tree, sharing an umbrella to shelter from the rain, then they get invited to dinner.
But their hosts are a judge, a barrister and a crime writer etc and they suspect Raffles is the burglar nicknamed the "Swell Mobsman". The hosts (who could all eat apples through a fence) are unsubtle in their suspicions but are forced to eat crow after Raffles diverts their suspicions via another burglary. This was good, Bunny is so in awe of his pal, it's sweet.
"What do you do?"
"A middle-aged man of blaggardly appearance and criminal type. Hits you off rather neatly wouldn't you say Bunny?"
"Wouldn't you say that this was fun?"
Chest of Silver
Raffles heads off to Scotland while his rooms are fitted for the new electric light and a telephone. Bunny has to hide Raffles' stash of cash and silver in his bank vault. A sarcastic banker worker is mean to Bunny and Mackenzie of the Yard shows up to search Raffles' abode. Mackenize is played by a different actor than in the pilot ep.
Bunny's bank is robbed, there is a twist and the duo (who are such a couple) sit around basking in how clever Raffles is. There is a sarcastic porter and the Raffles/Bunny comic banter is brilliant. I think 'Highlander: The Raven' was aiming for this, but never quite made it.
"I would find it terribly embarrassing to explain the rather large sums of hard cash which do sometimes fall into my hands."
"Allowing thieves to walk straight into your strongroom!"
"They didn't walk in madam. They spent quite a long time forcing an entry."
"The end of country houses and clubs and cricket and whiskey and sullivans."
"He doesn't deserve to catch me."