July 31st, 2011

Scary Books

Trailers and Stuff

'Johnny English: Reborn' trailer
This was funnier than the whole of the first movie. The only decent joke in that film was the Corgi joke. I will add that this film looks better than 'Cowboys & Aliens'

'Mean Girls 2' trailer
Oh hell no.

'Covert Affairs' opening credits
Thats different.

'The Hard Times of RJ Berger' Quotes
"Know what I mean?"
"Not even remotely."

"They will eat you alive and leave you a husk of a man."

'That 70's Show' Quote
"Those damned Beatles. All you need is love. All you need is a job and a haircut."
Scary Books

Book Review: Kitty's Big Trouble

Kitty's Big Trouble by Carrie Vaughn
Kitty, Ben and Cormac are investigating if General Sherman was a werewolf and if Wyatt Earp was a vampire slayer. Their investigation is interrupted when an ally summons them to San Francisco's Chinatown.

A confrontation with the ancient vampire Roman over a magical artifact is looming plus Kitty is about to meet beings she had no idea existed. This is a good Kitty adventure which widens the scope of the Kitty-verse. It is obviously inspired by 'Big Trouble in Little China' and is a fun read.

Best Lines:
""It's not a dog, it's my husband!"
"Huh that's progressive."
"Shut up, he's a werewolf too."

Scary Books

Teen Wolf 1x04 Reviewed

Magic Bullet
Allison's aunt Kate (Jill Wagner of 'Blade: The Series') shows up to be annoying and OTT. Allison is somehow unaware of her family's hunting. Kate shoots Derek. Jackson annoys. Stiles is thick and Scott is dense and selfish.

Allison's dad is a jerk and so is Scott. Allison's psycho family invite Scott for dinner and harass him. Derek shows off his tattoo. This ep is full of annoying idiots. Scott is lazy, stupid and dumb beyond belief.

Derek does some bizarre stuff that cures his gunshot wound for no apparent reason. It is hinted Kate burnt down Derek's house and killed his family. It is also hinted that Kate has no time for the Argent's code as she lights the gas fire in an OTT overly flamboyant manner.

This was mediocre mostly due to Kate being OTT and Scott being offensively stupid.

Best Lines:
"Please put the assault rifle away."

"We're not some sort of separatist gun-nut family."

"Are you okay?"
"Apart from the agonizing pain."

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Scary Books

Torchwood Miracle Day Ep 3 Reviewed

Dead of Night
It's all talk about Big Pharma and over-population, sort of like Speaker's Corner. Rex yells. It seems 'They' have been planning this for years. A new cult called The Soulless spring up. Esther annoys and is stupid. Rex shows off his gaping chest wound. Phi-Corp is investigated, probably for having such a stupid name.

Jilly smirks. Rex yells some more and stomps off. Jack gets some. Rex gets some with Vera. Gwen still has the Torchwood contact lenses. How?!? Did she have them in her pocket while being dragged onto the plane? Vera helps spy on Phi-Corp. Jilly keeps lurking.

There is talk of new laws and a new society. Jack somehow locates Oswald Danes to have a chat with him. Jack looks like an over varnished table. Danes is creepy and is being worshiped like he's Polanski or something. This was dull.

Best Lines:
"You weren't impaled."
"You should have seen the other guy."
Scary Books

True Blood 3x04 + United States of Tara 3x04 + Rubicon 1x12 Reviewed

9 Crimes
Sookie preens over Alcide. Bill dumps Sookie. Sam cops on that his family are trash. Franklin does real bad things to Tara. Bill swears and is boring. Jessica annoys. Arlene gets even more grating. Lorena is desperate. Sookie is entitled and Debbie Pelt skanks out.

Eric's bar is raided. Pam is menaced. Talbot annoys. Debbie goes through a creepy initiation ceremony. Sookie wears a disguise. Eric and Bill each throw the other under a bus. Don Swayze plays one of the werewolves who seem to have unlimited access to steroids. A stripper is eaten. This is okay.

Best Lines:
"The man you loved never existed except in your head."

"He's being itching for another Inquisition for centuries."

"She's close to losing her fortune now that we're being taxed by the IRS."

Charmian has had enough of Tara and who can blame her. Charmain has gone into premature labour thanks to Tara and has a girl. Meanwhile Tara acts up again and there is no explanation as to how the damage Tara caused will be paid for.

Charmain after an emergency c-section doesn't want Tara near her baby. Lionel annoys. Kate screws up again. Marshall just goes along with Lionel. Dr Hatteras won't take Tara's crap. Tara wails about Charmain not letting her near the baby. Charmain points out correctly that nothing ever changes.

Kate decides on yet another new job. Max is giving up on Tara and she finally admits that she is seriously disturbed. This was good.

Best Line:
"An angry cop outside wants a word."

Wayward Son
Kateb shows up and Will tries to foil his depredations. The conspirators mutters, they look like they can't remember how doors work. Miles yells at people, Will looks like an under nourished chicken. Katherine the special snowflake bores. Maggie is dumb.

Will talks to Kateb's people and makes connections. Kateb listens to Kansas and something big happens. This was okay.

Best Line:
"All this to sink a boat?"
Scary Books

Movie Review: Captain America The First Avenger (2011)

1942 and Steve Rogers is a puny homunculus who looks about 12. But he still gets into the SSR thanks to Stanley Tucci (dead meat), Tommy Lee Jones (gruff) and Hayley Atwell (enunciates Englishly).

Steve agrees to be shot up with what looks like dishwasher cleaner and becomes Captain America, super-soldier. Now he, his best buddy Bucky and the cardboard Howling Commandos go up against Red Skull (Hugo Weaving) who wears a lot of black leather and has an uncanny valley cartoon like face. Captain America wants to punch Red Skull and Hydra into extinction.

This is a good action film with a bittersweet ending. Howard Stark (Dominic Cooper) is a scene stealer but Red Skull isn't the murderous skull faced horror he could have been. Also the post credits scene was a yawner.