April 9th, 2010

Scary Books

Retro Trailer Time

'Drag me to Hell’ trailer
What is with horror movie trailers giving away the ending?

‘US Marshals’ trailer
I want to see this.
Scary Books

Movie Review: The House of the Devil (2009)

It’s some time in the 1980’s and Samantha needs rent money to pay her kindly landlady (Dee Wallace of ‘Popcorn’). She takes a babysitting job with the freaky Ulman family. They’re creepy and they live in the middle of nowhere. Samantha is not a keen judge of character as she stays in the house even when she learns there is no baby.

Mrs Ulman (Mary Woronov of ‘Night of the Comet’) is freaky, Samantha’s best friend Megan has an advanced case of processed hair and there are really unsubtle hints about an eclipse. Malice oozes from Mr Ulman but Samantha stays. She walks around the house and eats a nasty looking pizza. Eventually she finds out that the rodenty looking baddies have plans for her. Things finally get interesting and then the film ends. This was slow and really boring.
Scary Books

Lost Season 6 Ep 11 Review

Happily Ever After

Season 6 keeps showing me an outhouse and claiming it’s the Taj Mahal. Widmore’s kidnapped Desmond. This leads to Desmond beating Widmore with an IV stand. Zoë and Widmore experiment on Desmond which fries his brain (maybe) so he agrees to work for them until he decides to wander off with Sayid instead. Zoë and Widmore both need to shut up, frak off and die. Also Zoë needs to wear a bra. Widmore has loads of people on the island. How many people did Widmore pack onto his submarine?

In the flash sideways Claire shows off her ratty hair extensions, Desmond wears a bad wig and is Widmore’s right hand man/lickspittle. Widmore is married to Eloise and Daniel is a musician. Also Charlie the junkie makes Desmond have visions. The two realities are apparently blending into each other, oh joy.

Desmond goes chasing after Penny Milton. Eloise makes stupid statements. Daniel does his usual annoying mumbling and Charles Manson like twitching. Desmond and Penny meet. This was stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid.

What are Widmore’s lot doing and who cares? Why does Jin just stand around with Widmore’s crew? Imaginary time? Quantum mechanics? Is Desmond brain fried?
Scary Books

V Ep 6 Review

Pound of Flesh

Anna institutes empathy tests. Marcus’ face continues to not move, but maybe he is getting sick of her and her rat chewed hair. The V’s announce their Live Aboard programme. The annoying mercenary realises the ‘resistance’ consists only of: “A priest, a civvie, a lizard and a fed.” Couldn’t they have got Michael Ironside for the mercenary role?

Erica takes Tyler to his dad Joe (Nicholas Lea of ‘The X Files’) to keep him away from Lisa. Jack talks to Chad and his fake tan. Joshua and Samuel help Ryan broadcast a message to the Fifth Column. Ryan slips Val a drug to help with her creepy pregnancy. Lisa tracks Tyler down. Georgie is busted on the mother ship. This was good, a vast improvement.

What is Anna lying to her people about? What is Anna’s plan? What is Lisa up to with Tyler? What are Joe and Erica hiding from Tyler? Where has Tyler’s annoying friend gone? What did the ultrasound show? What does the hybrid baby mean? Doesn’t Tyler wonder how Lisa found him?
Scary Books

Book Reviews: Roadkill + A Girl’s Guide To Guns And Monsters + Silver Borne

Roadkill by Rob Thurman

This is the fifth ‘Cal Leandros’ novel after ‘Nightlife’, ‘Moonshine’, ‘Madhouse’ and ‘Deathwish’. Cal and his half-brother Niko have a new case. They have to find a stolen coffin that contains a man known as the Plague of the World.

Cal, Niko and their crew head off on a road trip to stop the Plague of the World escaping; naturally things don’t go to plan. There is death, betrayal and Cal being consumed by the monstrous half of his heritage.

This was good though Cal’s narration can be tiring to read. I hope the sixth book is as good as this.

A Girl’s Guide To Guns And Monsters edited by Martin H. Greenberg and Kerrie Hughes

This does exactly what it says on the tin.

The Drifter
In the Old West, a woman hunts down a familiar monster. This was good.

Best Friends

A teenage couple deal with the monster that is too close. This was excellent.

A woman literally hunts down love. This was okay.

Murder She Workshopped
A writing course is dangerous to one’s health. This is okay.

Heart of Ash
Your typical female monster slayer is no so typical. Okay.

No Matter Where You Go

Vicki Nelson deals with idiot teenagers who open a portal to some Lovecraftian dimension. This is excellent.

Signed in Blood
A woman meets a pookha and the author shows she got her Irish mythology wrong.

Broch De Shlang
A family is cursed. Okay.

The Wooly Mountains
The neighbours get together to deal with a monster. This is good.

Silver Borne by Patricia Briggs

This is the fifth in the ‘Mercy Thompson’ series after ‘Moon Called’, ‘Blood Bound’, ‘Iron Kissed’ and ‘Bone Crossed’. Mercy’s in trouble again. The local werewolf pack are having problems due to their stupid power games and the fae are up to something.

Mercy has to pull it all together and make things better. This is good but the endless detail about the werewolves’ idiot power plays annoy.