April 2nd, 2010

Scary Books

Burn Notice Season 1 Eps 8 to 11 Reviewed

Wanted Man

The gang prove a man is innocent of stealing a diamond brooch. Michael finds some information on why he got burned. There are hijinks and a tiresome subplot that deals with Fi flirting with the client of the week. This was okay.

Best Lines:
Even paranoids have enemies.”

“We just left the world’s largest bounty hunter knocked out on my front lawn.”

“People who talk to you. Sometimes they don’t live so long.”


~
Hard Bargain

The gang help Nick whose fiancée has been abducted. Nick’s dumb. Michael does improbable things; he’s a spy not a wizard. A bureaucrat (Ayre Gross) shows up to kill Michael. This was dull.

~
False Flag

Evelyn (Lucy Lawless of ‘Xena, Warrior Princess’) asks Michael to help find her missing husband and son. Michael falls for this weeping woman who looks like Patricia Arquette. Her despair and desperation cannot be denied. Then he finds out she’s a liar. This was tiresome.

~
Loose Ends

Nate the idiot brother returns. Michael gets aggro from his vile family. Michael gets a visit from a mysterious guy and they play idiot games with her. Fi jumps off a bridge and shows off her granny pants. Everything goes bad. There are angry drug dealers and men in black running around. Michael and his swaggering coterie of idiots do stuff. This ep and the show in general are a disappointment.
Scary Books

Movie Review: Ricochet (1991)

In 1983 Earl Talbot Blake (John Lithgow of ‘Raising Cain’) is a criminal nutter who is arrested by cop Nick Styles (Denzel Washington) in a dramatic arrest. It’s all caught on tape by a guy with a video camera and Styles becomes a hero and Blake a joke.

Seven years pass as Styles becomes ADA, marries, has two kids and does a lot of charity work. He also grows a horrible moustache. Blake plots revenge while in jail, he acquires an adoring sidekick and commits an improbable escape. Then he fakes his death and he and his sidekick start bringing about the ruin of Styles.

Soon Styles’ career and image are in tatters as Blake wrecks havoc in his life. Styles mopes in a pink bathrobe and then Blake ups the ante even more by framing Styles for the murder of his best friend. Styles fights back. This was okay.

Best Lines:
He’s trying to make me look crazy.”
“Well I hate to tell you honey, but it’s working.”

“Is that how you treat your friends? I’m glad we’re enemies.”

Scary Books

Quotes of the Day

'Quantum Leap’ Quotes

Al, how can we just disappear without a trace?”
“Because we’re right smack dap in the middle of the triangle. Whole ships disappear. Planes, boats, jets, fish, birds, what, what, what?”

“We’ve got lawyers and we’re going to sue!”

~
Andromeda’ Quotes

Emergency? You mean in the event that the command deck crew is reduced to a fine red mist splattered across the walls in a bloody mural?”
“That would qualify, yes.”

“Your people should have concentrated on more important things: treachery, cunning, proper table manners.”

“All my enemies have died in terrible, highly improbable accidents that cannot be connected to me.”

~
Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ Quotes

I saw that gesture, you see me after graduation.”

“Congratulations to the class of 1999. You all proved more or less adequate.”

“I’ll be killing you here in a minute or so.”
“You know that threat gets more frightening every time I hear it.”
“Are we gonna fight or is there just going to be a monster sarcasm rally?”

Scary Books

Retro Trailer Fun!

‘Charmed’ ep promo: ‘Morality Bites’
This is 11 years old! A great trailer and a classic episode.

‘Charmed’ ep promo: ‘Pardon My Past’
Another great trailer and another classic episode.

Charmed’ ep promo: ‘Just Harried’
Hee! Somehow Prue makes Piper’s wedding all about her.

Charmed’ ep promo: ‘Sin Francisco’
Double hee! Shame we never got that Piper vs Phoebe brawl the promo promised.

Double Jeopardy’ trailer
This is ‘The Fugitive Part III’ isn’t it? Plus the trailer gives the whole plot away.
Scary Books

Tape Tale of '02

Cleared out a tape from about 2002. It had one ep each of ‘Angel, ‘Charmed’, ‘Smallville’ and ‘Star Trek: Enterprise’.

The ‘Angel’ ep was the season 3 ‘The Price' in which Cordy whines, Angel rants, Wesley is not sorry for his betrayal and the hotel is invaded by demonic slugs or something. Connor returns. This was dull.

Best Line:
“You don’t mess with dark magics and expect to just walk away like it doesn’t matter.”

~
Then there was a ‘Charmed’ season 4 ep ‘Long Live the Queen’. Phoebe is Queen of the Underworld and her court is in Cole’s penthouse for some reason. Phoebe is selfish acts like a snot. Piper is depressed. Paige shrieks. Cole broods and then the sisters kill him, or so they think. Piper and Paige forgave Phoebe’s latest betrayal, so why didn’t they save Cole? This was dull.

Best Line:
Phoebe you’re evil. You’re like the Queen of all evil, literally.”

~
The ‘Smallville’ ep was the season 1 ‘Tempest’ in which Lionel showed up to torment Lex, Lana was sucked up by a tornado, Jonathan was annoying and Clark ditched Chloe at the school dance to run after Lana. This just annoyed.

~
Finally there was ‘Vox Sola’ a season 1 ‘Star Trek: Enterprise’ ep. T’Pol offends everyone with her smugness. An alien invades the ship. Tucker and Archer act like fools. This was boring unlike another season 1 ep ‘Detained’ which had Dean Stockwell as a guest star. Now that was a good ep, unlike this one.
Scary Books

Retro Review: Charmed Season 2 Ep 2

Morality Bites

It’s 1999 and Phoebe has a vision of being burned at the stake in 2009 so she, Piper and Prue time travel into their future bodies to find out what’s up. In this 2009 Piper and Leo are divorced and they have a daughter named Melinda. Prue is blonde, has no concept of work or age appropriate attire and owns Bucklands. There are voice command controlled TV’s, weird cars, MTV are showing ‘Real World 18: On the Moon’ and there is no sign of a recession or Paige, Chris, Wyatt and Billie. And Phoebe? She’s in jail, about to be burned at the stake after getting caught using her magic to kill a man.

A local DA named Nathaniel Pratt has set up a modern day witch hunt. For some reason Piper and Prue have escaped suspicion. Nobody even notices when Prue’s power blows up half of Piper’s attic. And this with posters all over the city that proclaim: ‘Rid the evil. Turn in witches’.

The sisters plan to break Phoebe out. Phoebe wails in jail as she is tormented by Pratt, who is a great baddie. Pratt plans to burn all witches. Phoebe realises her future self crossed a line and so allows the execution to happen. It’s very dramatic as Phoebe is burnt at the stake while her sisters cry. Did nobody notice them in the chamber? This was good and an example of ‘Charmed’ at its best. Still Phoebe seemed to have forgotten this lesson as by season 8 she had turned into a selfish skeletal, glitter eye shadow sporting hag.

Why were Cal Greene and Pratt never mentioned again? How did Phoebe kill Cal? Why are the sisters so obsessed with men?

Best Lines:
“Let that be a warning to other witches out there. You’re next.”

“WITCH!”

“What did I do? Premonition the man to death?”

“I love the smell of burnt witch in the morning.”

“She used her power to kill Greene, got caught and her magic exposed by Nathaniel Pratt.”

“I thought that the to hell with the little people part was particularly persuasive.”

Scary Books

Caprica Ep 9 Review

End of the Line

Clarice and Barnabas clash. Lacy is stupid. Joseph lies on his sofa getting mouldy. Sam objects to this. Sam should have thought twice before stealing the affections of Joseph’s only surviving child then shouldn’t he? Evelyn is revealed to have been Joseph’s v-world guide. What is her agenda? Joseph meets Tamara, she gets rid of him and he comes out of v-world to brood. He’s a virtual junkie and Tamara’s doing whatever it is she does.

Daniel’s in trouble about the chip. People know what he did. Vergis is winning. Zoë continues to be a psychopath by manipulating Lacy, killing Philomon and stealing a car and going for a ride. The Zoë robot can drive? The car can take the weight of the Zoë robot? Zoë crashes through a police barricade and we can but hope TPTB get rid of Zoë.

Also Amanda jumps off a bridge and Lacy is dumb enough to let Barnabas scare her into killing one of Clarice’s husbands. This was good but Zoë and Lacy need to go.
Richard/Lost

Lost Season 6: The Package Reviewed

In the flash sideways Sun and Jin aren’t married. They encounter Keamy and Mikhail. There’s a shoot out and soon Sun is suffering from acute lead poisoning.

Back on the island Sayid acts stoned. Fake Locke says something is coming. Widmore’s gang attack Fake Locke’s crew. Elsewhere Ben doesn’t seem concerned about Richard stomping off into the jungle. Sun is selfish, throws a tantrum, doesn’t seem to care about her daughter, then fake Locke chases her into a tree and she gets aphasia.

Richard stalks back and suggests they actually do something. Widmore claims he’s here to stop fake Locke. Oh shut up Jim Robinson. If only TPTB had got the guy who plays Paul Robinson to do this role instead. Zoë is a geophysicist and her name does not appear to be Zoë. She needs to shut up; her Liz Lemon face annoys me. Widmore has Desmond on his boat. This ep was tiresome. Really tiresome. Idiot flash sideways and useless characters and idiot plots.

Why isn’t Kate’s name on the wall anymore? Does fake Locke want Kate and Claire to kill each other? He’s setting it up. Where is Penny? What is fake Locke? What is Widmore up to?
Scary Books

V Ep 5 Review

Welcome to the War

I guess TPTB were ordered to make better episodes and so they did. Yay! Jack the priest is brought to a Visitor healing centre, healed and injected with R6. Which is not good as the R6 is a tracker. Erica fights off a V and fails to parent Tyler. Val doesn’t know she’s carrying a hybrid baby even when she gets the urge to eat a dead mouse. Tyler’s a jerk, no change there.

Ryan looks up another v and keeps secrets from his buddies. Erica strong-arms a mercenary named Hobbes into training the anti-V resistance. Anna bends the tool Chad to her will. Chad is useless. Marcus broods. Ryan does a icky trick with his eye.

Anna the Queen decides to build an army so she mates amid dry ice and then to give her eggs nourishment, eats her mate. Oh that was nasty. This was good.

Is Jack’s boss a V? What is Lisa’s destiny? Why did Anna send for the coming fleet?