February 26th, 2010

Scary Books

2002 TV

Cleared out a tape from 2002ish. It has one ‘Star Trek: Enterprise’, one ‘The X Files’ and one ‘Angel’ on it.

The ‘Enterprise’ ep was the season 1 ‘Two Day and Two Nights’ in which Archer, his dog, Hoshi, Tucker, Reed and Mayweather visit Risa. Phlox tries to hibernate. Reed and Tucker are sleazy. Archer bores. Hoshi has a one night stand and it’s all so dull.

The ‘X Files’ ep was the season 9 two-parter ‘Nothing Important Happened Today’. Never was an episode so aptly named. Lucy Lawless and Cary Elwes were wasted as guest stars, the revised opening credits reeked and there was endless padding. Did anyone care about Doggett and Monica? People talk portentously at each other about cloning and super soldiers. This show was so dour. William’s baby mobile moves by itself! Wow, cue the ominous piano chords. This was boring.

Finally the ‘Angel’ ep was the season 3 finale ‘Tomorrow’. Groo stops making faces and leaves, Cordelia has vile hair. Justine and the dead Holtz fool the moronic Connor. Cordelia and Angel get close. Wesley tries really hard to be hardcore. Skip tells Cordelia it’s time for her to become a higher being, he is so lying. Cordelia glows and floats into the sky. Angel ends up at the bottom of the ocean. This ep was trying way too hard.

Best Line:
Where’d everybody go?”
Scary Books

Trailers

‘Open Graves’ trailer
Bad CGI, idiot dialogue and looks cheesy. I still want to see this.

The Owl Service’ title
This looks freaky.

Vampire Diaries’ trailers
This looks cool.

‘Dollhouse’ season 2 Eps 12&13 trailers
This looks bizarre.

'Heroes' Season 4 Eps 10&11 trailers
Finally stuff is happening.
Scary Books

Survivors Series 2 Ep 6 Review

Series 2 couldn’t have entertained a dead rat but this episode injects some tension, suspense and an interesting hook into series 3.

At the lab the gang meet surviving scientist Fiona. She claims Abby caused the wipe out of the lab by infecting Jill. Anya and Tom have issues and the same conversation over and over. Whitaker is also alive (he stole the lab’s supply of anti-serum) and hiding Peter. Abby is dumb and shouts and Peter is moronic and shouts. Abby is a drama queen and declares that only she knows the meaning of loss.

Al volunteers for an experimental vaccine. Greg and his instantly cured shotgun wound investigate PSJ’s computer system and learns secrets. Naj is dumb. Al lives, the vaccine works. Fiona runs off to join Whitaker only for the stupid brat Peter to shoot her. Anya breaks up with Tom, who responds by cleaning his gun ominously. Anya wanted to take the vaccine on the road to save others; she alone seems to have compassion.

Whitaker plans to take Peter to Landry. Whitaker doesn’t seem to be mourning his wife and child. A plane flies in for Whitaker and Peter; there is a race to the airfield. There’s a standoff and a gun battle. Landry blathers about rebuilding society and reveals that PSJ accidentally created the virus and organised the covert evacuation when they knew a pandemic was inventible. Anya splutters: “You killed billions of people!” Landry shrugs.

Whitaker’s shot dead, Naj is a moron, Peter and Abby are reunited, Landry runs off with the vaccine and Tom hides out on the plane. This was okay with some decent tension and a nice cliffhanger.

Where is the man Peter was with at the end of series 1? Who is Landry? Where is the lab’s power coming from? What bigger organisation is PSJ a small part of? What is Tom planning to do? When is the rebuilding of society going to start? Or will the mutated virus kill everyone left?

Best Lines:
“This isn’t your nice middle class world anymore, this is the Dark Ages.”

“How could you leave your friends and family to die?”
“I chose life.”

“There is no future.”

“How did you know about the virus before anyone else?”

Scary Books

Caprica Ep 4 Review

Gravedancing

The STO set off another bomb. So the Global Defence Department search Zoë’s home and the Athenian Academy. However the school turns up clean as Sister Clarice was alerted to the raid.

Daniel goes on a talk show to repair the Graystone image. Sam stalks Amanda and he has a bobble head bull in his car. Lacy chases after a bad boy. Joseph simmers. Zoë dances with one of Daniel’s minions.

On the ‘Backtalk’ show, Daniel’s attempt to fend off the forces of hell flop until Amanda storms the stage and wins people over. Daniel reveals the existence of the avatar. Sam and Amanda chat. Joseph changes his mind about the hit. This was okay.

Why is Zoë still hiding from her ‘parents’? Why does Zoë need to go to Geminion? What’ll become of Clarice’s group marriage? Will Agent Duram uncover Clarice?

Best Line:
“You made an electronic ghost of your dead daughter?”
Scary Books

The Clifton House Mystery (1978) Ep 1 Review

This haunted house suspense tale is okay. It is stagy, slow moving and looks very dated but it knows how to crate ominous tension. An old lady has to move out of her home which is taken over by a young family. The mother is an annoying nag, the father is useless, the daughter wears a huge polyester nightdress and one son sees a ghost via bad SFX. A creepy child mutters creepily. I look forward to seeing the rest of this.
Richard/Lost

Lost Season 6 Ep 5 Review

Lighthouse

Jack and Hurley wander around the island until the find yet another island monument, a lighthouse. Claire has been living in the jungle for three years learning to make soup from rocks and grass. She’s nuts and friends with fake Locke. Jin is so screwed. Jacob tells Hurley that someone is coming to the island. Kate is still trying to find Claire unaware Claire has anger issues about her son. Murderous anger issues. So either fake Locke or Jacob is the worst person who ever lived. But which one?

In the flash sideways, Jack has a surly son named David. Who is David’s mother and why does Jack only see him once a month? David’s surly and plays piano, what is this ‘Everwood’? Jack meets Dogen.

What’s with the Egyptian theme? Who’s coming to the island? What is with the lighthouse? What does Jack have to do? What is Jin playing at? Is Jacob going to let fake Locke and Claire kill everyone in the Temple? Claire plans to kill Kate if she raised Aaron, so a Lindsay Lohan/Samantha Ronson type brawl is forthcoming no doubt. What does fake Locke have against the Others? This was good.

Best Lines:
How is it that we’ve never seen it before?”

“Does it say anything on your arm about the door being jammed?”

“That’s weird.”

“Mission unaccomplished.”