February 16th, 2010

Scary Books

2002/2003 TV Viewing

Cleared out a tape from 2002/2003. It had one movie and two TV show episodes on it.

Firstly there was an episode of ‘Star Trek: The Next Generation’. It was the ep ‘I, Borg’ where the crew discover a lone Borg drone survivor and befriend it. Then they teach it to think of itself an individual, call the drone Hugh and send it back to the Borg as a weapon. Picard makes speeches. Guinan’s rude. There is lots of dull moralising in-between the low rent looking scenes. Nobody wonders where/when Hugh was assimilated or even thinks to ask. Geordi can’t act. The ‘TNG’ cast as a whole have less personality than the Borg. There is no mention of a Borg Queen. At the end of the ep Hugh is abandoned, forgotten and cast off. This really wants to be worthy but isn’t.

The movie was ‘Cruel Intentions 2: Manchester Prep’. After the wonderfully camp original film TPTB decided to turn it into a TV show which was cancelled before ever airing. This is the unholy mish mash of TV show footage and new scenes. Sebastian (Robin Dunne of ‘Sanctuary’) is poor and nice and his father is a gold digger. Kathryn (Amy Adams of ‘Enchanted’) his new stepsister is mean and bullied by her vile mother. The stepsiblings fight though over what isn’t really clear. There is no sign of Blaine or Court or Greg. This boring and badly acted. Kathryn’s hellbeast behaviour and running of the school bully society doesn’t play into her angelic reputation in the first film. This takes itself too seriously and there is no camp. TPTB try way too hard to make Sebastian nice so his sudden personality change in the last few minutes makes no sense.

Finally there was an ‘Odyssey 5’ ep named ‘Kitten’. I used to love ‘Odyssey 5’ which was all about time travel, the end of the world, aliens and multiple conspiracies. Naturally it was cancelled and nothing ever explained. A Sentient (aka evil alien) becomes obsessed with Neil (Christopher Gorham the show killer of ‘Popular’, ‘Jake 2.0’ and ‘Harper’s Island’). Angela is up on the ISS and a colleague doesn’t like her. Neil’s obsessed with his stupid girlfriend. Made up computer technology is used to fight the Sentient. Sarah obsesses over her son and comes across as a lunatic. This ep was really stupid.

Best Line:
“My future ex wife that wasn’t.”
Scary Books

Heroes Season 4 Ep 7 Review

Once Upon A Time In Texas

Hiro has travelled back in time to save Charlie. This ep is nothing but Sylar, Hiro, Noah and the evil carnies. Joy. Why does Hiro act like he’s special needs? Charlie annoys. Noah is a goob and flirts with a female co-worker never mentioned before or since. Samuel’s ‘Irish’ accent wobbles. Hiro saves Charlie. Why does nobody ever just kill Sylar?

Noah macks on Lauren his co-worker. Isaac pops up. Noah obsesses over Claire; Lyle is always an afterthought to him. Why isn’t Hiro’s brain melting? Why does Hiro give people idiotic nicknames? Why does Sylar fix Charlie? Why did Lauren have her memory wiped? Why did Samuel trap Charlie in time? This was dumb.
Scary Books

Flashforward Ep 8 Review

Playing Cards With Coyote
This show is dead isn’t it? How many show runners has it gone through? C’est le vie.
 

Al’s suicide note to Celia makes headline news. It seems the future can be changed. There is another unnecessary musical montage. Dylan’s still in hospital being a bed blocker yet Janis has returned to work.

Simon stands around being ominous which is all he ever does. TPTB continue to ignore Bryce. He was about to publicly kill himself in ep 1 and yet he’s been ignored ever since and no-one asks him why he wanted to kill himself. Lloyd and Simon play poker if Lloyd wins he will go public with the information that he and Simon caused the blackout.

Mark gives Olivia the underwear she was wearing in the flashforward of her and Lloyd, so she throws it out. Tracey the beloved daughter is a mess. Tracey says Jericho tried to kill her because of what she saw them do. This was dull; I’m all but out of interest in this show.

Is there a mole in the FBI? Simon is a bad, bad man yet why are we supposed to care? What is Aaron’s flashforward all about? Where Lloyd and Simon’s poker buddies deaf? Did they not hear what the duo were talking about? Why are TPTB ignoring Bryce? What was the final scene with the tattooed men and the rings all about?

Best Line:
“Don’t you ever get tired of hearing yourself pontificate?”
Traveler

Numb3rs Season 5 Ep 8 Review

Thirty Six Hours

This is the first good episode of a lacklustre season. The team attempt to rescue passengers trapped inside a derailed train. Nikki is a jerk, Charlie wants to save the day with bots and David makes an ‘Ironman’ joke. Don takes charge and gets to a “Watch your head” moment with the villain of the week. This was very good.
Scary Books

Supernatural season 5 Ep 3 Review

Free to Be You and Me

Sam decides to give up hunting so Dean hangs out with Castiel looking for the archangel Raphael. Apparently no angel will dare harm Dean as he’s Michael’s vessel. Being Michel’s vessel will harm Dean as it will fry his brain.

Dean and Castiel bond by trapping Raphael with holy oil. Meanwhile hunters wave demon blood at Sam and then Lucifer pops up and tells him Sam is his vessel. Sam is an intelligence free zone. This was good.

Best Lines:
“Eat it Twilight!”

“A deputy Sheriff laid eyes on the Archangel.”
“And he still has eyes?”

Scary Books

Fringe season 2 Ep 15 Review

Jacksonsville

The two universes collide with devastating consequences. We get a brief glimpse of New York in the other universe before a building from there collides into one here. People merge with their doubles and it’s all very gross. Newton is behind it though he doesn’t appear in this ep. In fact he hasn’t done much or appeared much since his dramatic debut. So much for him being the big bad.

Walter reveals that for something to come from the other universe, something from our universe must go to the other side. There has to be balance. Which makes one wonder, when Walter stole Peter what was used as balance?

Walter reveals that the experiments he did on Olivia as a child made her able to see things from the other side glimmering. He reactivates this ability in her. Which saves some lives but when Olivia and Peter are about to go out for drinks she sees him glimmering like Edward Cullen. Oh dear. She’s shattered and Walter begs her: “Please don’t tell him.” This was very good.

Where can the show go from here? Will Olivia keep the secret? How much longer can Peter be kept in the dark? Astrid suspects, Olivia now knows even Newton knows. Will this change Olivia and Peter’s relationship? What will Peter do when he finds out that his 'dad' is his kidnapper?

Does Olivia love Peter? Does Peter love her? They nearly did kiss after all. Why is coffee rare in the other universe? Are there double decker cars in the other universe? What were Walter and Bell thinking by doing their experiments?

Best Lines:
“A quantum tectonic event.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Conspiracy nuts are going to have a field day.”

Scary Books

Book Reviews: Sherlock Holmes in America + Paladin of Souls

Sherlock Holmes in America edited by Martin H. Greenberg, Jon L. Lellenberg and Daniel Stashomer

Holmes and Watson have passed from literature into legend and this collection of stories has taken them to America for more mystery solving. This is a very good collection.

The Case of Colonel Warburton’s Madness
Watson tells Holmes of an incident that happened to him when he was in San Francisco. Holmes solves the case. This was excellent.

Ghosts and the Machine
This is the diary of a young Mycroft Holmes which tells of how he and his annoying brother visited America. This was good.

Excerpts From An Unpublished Memoir Found In The Basement Of The Home For Retired Actors
A pompous actor’s biography tells of an unwitting encounter with a young Holmes as he learned the art of disguise. This is hilarious.

The Flowers of Utah
An okay follow up to ‘Study in Scarlet’.

The Adventure of the Coughing Dentist
Holmes, Watson and Wyatt Earp solve a murder. This is okay.

The Minister’s Missing Daughter
Holmes and Watson solve the case of a woman’s disappearance. This is okay.

Recalled to Life
During his great hiatus, Holmes helped a man victimised by a villain. Good.

The Seven Walnuts
Holmes and Watson do not appear in this story. Instead the Houdini family use them as the inspiration to solve a case. This is very funny.

The Case of the Rival Queens
Holmes and Watson investigate odd goings on at a seemingly idyllic commune. This was good.

The Song At Twilight
In 1914 an elderly Holmes has an odd undercover job in America. This is somewhat bizarre. Still it was nice to see Holmes mourn his late friend.

~
Paladin of Souls by Lois McMaster Bujold

From the author of ‘The Hallowed Hunt’ comes this tale of Ista, a royal dowager with a destiny.

Ista was cursed with madness and though she is now free of the curse, her keepers and attendants have her virtually imprisoned in a remote castle. Ista longs for freedom and talks her way into taking a pilgrimage.

But Ista is being guided by a god. On her path lie demons, magic, war and a struggle to save the realm. This is a richly detailed and enjoyable tale of magic, love and destiny.