January 1st, 2010

Scary Books

Six Degrees Eps 2 to 5 Reviewed

What Are The Odds

The gun from the crime Damian committed ends up with a guy who Carlos has to defend. Carlos it’ll be easy until the charge is upped to attempted murder. Also the client has an attitude from hell. Mae deals with the bratty Eliza. Damian has a gambling problem. Laura annoys. Steven has a shrew wife. Damian has a girlfriend Regina (Zoë Saldana of ‘Star Trek’ and ‘Avatar’) who bores. Carlos and Damian brood about their pasts. This was dully awful. Sure the stories interlock, but unlike ‘Lost’ this show is dull. Playing Flip The Kipper would be more interesting than this.

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A New Light

Whitney (Bridget Moynahan) wears a horrible pink outfit. Her cheating fiancé Roy (Jonathan Cake of ‘Chuck’) continues to be sleazy and hits on Laura. As if the Roy issue wasn’t bad enough Laura gets a videotape concerning her late husband. Mae (Erika Christensen of ‘Swimfan’) looks for her mother.

Carlos tries to help his ungrateful client who screams, yells and has a truly winning personality. Steven gets a date. The whole subplot about Laura’s dead husband peters out. This was dull.

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The Puncher

A guy runs around NY punching people. Steven deals with his shrew wife. Whitney gets her wedding dress fitted, it looks like the wedding dress Cheryl Cole had. Carlos/Mae and Damian/Regina double date. Mae lies. Laura tries to tell Whitney about Roy, Whitney’s a bitch. Roy gets punched and this leads to Whitney learning Roy is a dirty, rotten cheater. This was dull. It’s a dull version of ‘Melrose Place’.

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Masquerade

It’s Halloween. Mae’s brother Eric shows up. Carlos learns about Mae’s past and how she is wanted for questioning in connection to a murder. Mae is thankless to Carlos and Eric. It seems Mae dated a violent methhead/dealer and Eric killed someone to get her away from him. But that still doesn’t answer the question of: what’s in the box?

Everyone’s obsessed with Halloween and their costumes. Steven accidentally gets high; he and Anya (Shiri Appleby of ‘Roswell’ and ‘Swimfan’) fight and make up. Whitney’s a selfish drama queen and Mae turns Eric in to the FBI. This was dull.
Scary Books

Movie Review: Blades of Glory (2007)

This film opens to the dulcet tones of Andrea and Bocelli and Sarah Brightman and rapidly turns into a rude, crude rather funny ice skating comedy.

Jimmy MacElroy is a champion ice skater trained by his nasty adoptive father (it’s Mahone from ‘Prison Break’!) to be a champion and to wear a costume that has peacock feathers on his butt. His arch rival is the loud, rude, crude Chazz Michael Michaels (Will Ferrell) and his mullet.

After some blue screen ice skating scenes, the duo shares a gold medal. Until a brawl breaks out, they are stripped of their medal and banned for life from men’s figure skating. Jimmy’s left on the side of the road by his nasty father and Chazz gets drunk and fatter.

Three and a half years pass until an ice skating coach (Craig T Nelson) gets the forgotten rivals together to be the first ever men’s pairs skaters. They’re competing against the Von Waldenberg siblings for the gold at the World Wintersport Games.

The Von Waldenberg’s send their unloved sibling Katie out to sabotage the duo. Meanwhile Chazz and Jimmy try to perfect a difficult move that only the North Koreans have ever attempted before. It ended badly.

Chazz is an arrogant, dumb showman. Jimmy’s bland. Katie’s a useless, spineless twit. But this is funny. There’s bog roll eating, a chase scene, the Von Waldenberg’s do a JFK/Marilyn Monroe themed dance while Jimmy and Chazz do a routine to the theme song from ‘Flash Gordon’. There’s kissing, a dramatic slow-motion routine and it all ends well. This is good.

Best Lines:
“Darren turned to nurturing athletically advanced human orphans.”

“I was on quaaludes, I don’t even remember Oslo.”

“If I wanted him to share, I’d have bought him a brother.”

“Banned for life, that’s a long time.”

“I totally want to cut off your skin and wear it to my birthday.”

Scary Books

Quotes of the Day

Under The Dome’ Quotes:

‘The constitution’s been cancelled in The Mill,’ Junior said, with absolutely no idea that he was speaking prophecy.

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Sex and the City Quote:

Casino shops.”
“Those are for women who’ve lost all their money and have to turn tricks.”


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Mission Impossible III’ Quote:

Please don’t interrupt me when I’m asking rhetorical questions.”
Scary Books

TV show trailer fun

'Vampire Diaries’ ad
This looks good and brooding. Could this be like ‘Smallville’ before it went bad?

‘Survivors’ series 2 ads
TPTB have hyped up the action. Thus making the show look like ‘Holby City’

Flashforward’ ad
This ad made me decide to give this show a try.
Scary Books

Rants of the Day

I gave up on ‘Desperate Housewives’ in season 1. I can’t stand the ads for this show that show Teri Hatcher hiking her skirt up.

Am still reading 'Under the Dome'.

Ice everywhere. Can't get to the cinema to see 'Sherlock Holmes'.
Scary Books

Day of the Triffids (2009) Part 2 Review

The main problem with this new adaptation is that the CGI waddling greenery isn’t intrinsically scary. Bill and Coker end up at a nunnery run by Durant (Vanessa Redgrave makes a cameo appearance) Coker’s been stung by a Triffid but this has no side effects whatsoever. Bill learns just why the Triffids aren’t attacking the nunnery. One has to wonder: if the Triffids are attacking people, why do they leave whole untouched bodies behind?

Coker stays at the nunnery while Bill presses on. He meets Susan and her sister Imogen. They join him as he finally finds his dad Dennis (Brian Cox of ‘The Take’ and ‘Kings’)

Torrence and his idiot henchmen continue being fascist in a London where the underground pumping system and flood barrier are apparently working just fine unattended. Jo runs away into the night with Triffids rampaging, she ends up with Dennis too.

So for a very brief time Dennis, Bill, Jo, Susan and Imogen play house. The Triffids spawn, London falls and it’s increasingly obvious that the Triffids are sentient. Coker shows up again to send word that a refuge has been created on the Isle of Wight. Torrence also shows up to ruin things. But Bill and his magically regenerating MP3 player can save the day. Sort of. Bill’s endless flashbacks to Zaire turn out to have a point. Bad people get theirs and good people head off to the last bastion of humanity in a row boat. This was okay.

Best Line:
We had terrible trouble with the Triffids. They started using the underground tunnels, the sewers. Not very sporting.”