December 7th, 2009

Scary Books

Movie Review: Paranormal Activity (2009)

Katie and Micah have a problem, their house has something evil in it. Also Micah is a giant tool who makes the situation worse. He goes out of his way to antagonise the invisible demon that is stalking his girlfriend. He buys a camera to film the weird goings on and himself being a jerk ass.

This film is fairly creepy. A door shuts by itself, something unseen casts a shadow and an unattended ouija board bursts into flames. This is demon just messing with the couple. The too dumb to live Micah flings talcum powder around the landing to see demon footprints, goes alone into the upper crawlspace, ignores the ouija board spontaneously catching fire and yells at the demon to bring it on. It does.

If Micah hadn't annoyed the demon, things may not have got as bad as they did. This wasn't that scary but it was creepy with an unnerving sense of building and impending menace.

Still one question remains, how did the couple afford a two storey house with three bedrooms and a pool when Katie was a student and Michal a daytrader?
Scary Books


'Legion' trailer
That looks dumb.

'Daywalkers' trailer
Now that looks cool. Sam Neill as a vampire? I'm there.
Scary Books

Henry VIII (2003) miniseries Review

Before 'The Tudors' was this ITV miniseries starring Ray Winstone as the infamous king and Helena Bonham Carter as Anne Boleyn. This was okay, Winstone was a great Henry and he actually aged in the role unlike someone else I could name.

It begins with the death of Henry VII as he urges his son to have a son by marrying Katherine of Aragon. Henry is tender to Katherine but there is no son. So when he meets Anne Boleyn, all bets are off. The rat faced Cromwell lurks in shadows being sneaky. David Suchet and his eyebrows hams it up as the doomed Wolsey. Charles Dance (of 'Trinity') shows up as the equally doomed Buckingham.

Henry and Anne woo each other. Anne never brushes her hair. The do it on the royal bed which is surrounded by tacky looking net curtains that have H&A embroidered on them. They also swim in a lake in a terribly done blue screen SFX. Elizabeth is born, Henry does not react well. Norfolk (Mark Strong) plots his own survival. Henry turns on Anne and yells: "Get rid of her!" And it is done.

Henry marries Jane Seymour. Aske (Sean Bean) pops up to rebel, be arrogant, object to Henry's deeds and die horribly. Lady Mary returns to court to be sourfaced and fail to act. Henry beats Jane sending her into labour (and it is implied causing her death). Henry cries.

Henry comfort eats as his son Prince Edward grows up. Cromwell gets him to marry Anne of Cleeves. Henry ignores her. Norfolk serves up Catherine Howard (Emily Blunt). Cromwell dies in a botched execution. Henry rants and raves. Catherine is now queen and takes a bath in a very nice bathroom. But she fancies Culpepper and brings about her own ruin. Henry goes berserk and indulges in more wife beating.

Catherine weeps on the block but Henry is already falling for Catherine Parr. Then he dies. Edward is snotty, Mary makes bitch faces and Elizabeth looks wan. This was okay but nothing special. Oddly whole chunks of dialogue from this were recreated in the movie version of 'The Other Boleyn Girl'

Best Lines:
"You'd put me, your queen, aside for a whore?"

"Once you dispose of one queen......"

"You spend every day with different whores. Who's this? Some pear shaped trollop from the provinces no doubt."

"What do I get? Stillborn babies, bastards, daughters!"

"The king is taking you as a virgin, if he suspects otherwise, all of our lives are in danger."
Scary Books

Fringe Season 2 Ep 9 Review

A cargo ship runs aground and people aboard die from huge, gross parasites. The bio-engineered parasites turn out to be the latest way to smuggle drugs (albeit medicinal immune boosting drugs). Walter acts up, Astrid is in peril, Peter is manhandled, a teenager is snotty, Peter has his own lock pick kit, Walter puts a tracking device in his neck and Peter sleeps on the sofa. This was okay. The caring Walter/Peter dynamic is sweet but you just know it is doomed.

Best Lines:
"You are not smoking this thing."

"If you're buying hand sanitiser in bulk and hermetically sealing all your windows. You're either Howard Hughes or you're actually sick."
Scary Books

Book Review: The Hallowed Hunt

The Hallowed Hunt by Lois McMaster Bujold
From the author of 'The Sharing Knife' series, the 'Vorkosigan Saga' and 'The Spirit Ring' comes this tale of shamanic magic, obsession, love and destiny. A Prince has been slain by a noblewoman. Lord Ingrey kin Wolfcliff is ordered to transport the body for burial and the Lady Ijada to her judgment. With the late Prince's father near death, his crown is in play.

So Ingry and Ijada are just pieces in a game that a monstrous malevolence has been playing for generations. This is a good story that has engaging characters and it comes to a suitably sweeping conclusion involving the damned and the dead.

Best Line: "Talking to the gods had been a much more comfortable proposition when there had seemed no danger of Their talking back."