September 14th, 2009

Scary Books

Movie Review: Franklyn

Franklyn (2009)

This odd little British fantasy movie focuses on four seemingly separate plots. Preest (Ryan Phillippe of 'Cruel Intentions' and 'I Know What You Did Last Summer') is a self styled vigilante in a steampunk city, Emilia (Eva Green) is a pretentious suicidal art student, Milo has been dumped by his fiancée and Peter (Bernard Hill of 'The Scorpion King' and 'Titanic') is searching for his missing son.

But their stories are linked as slowly the truth about Preest's world is revealed, Milo meets someone he shouldn't and one night all paths converge in yelling, screaming, crisis and drama. This was okay and asks what is reality?
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Various musings

Soon ‘Fringe’ season 2 will start! Will Peter find out his true origins? Will Walter claim socio affective paternity? AKA a child who has been taken even without consent becomes the property of the kidnapper based upon the time the child is away from his parents? Now that’s creepy.

The summer movie line up was mostly dreadful. Hopefully the winter line-up will be better. There is ‘Sorority Row’, ‘Dorian Grey’, ‘Zombieland’, ‘Jennifer’s Body’, ‘2012’, ‘Avatar’ and ‘Sherlock Holmes’ to look forward to.
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The Invisible Man Quotes

“Is there a problem officer?”
“Yeah there’s problem, you’re psychotic.”

“See through psychotic.”

“You get in my way and I’ll damage you.”

“Silver eyed psychotic sociopath!”
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United States of Tara Season 1 Ep 2 Review

Aftermath

The nice opening credits show up which is really the only good thing about this letdown of an ep. It is revealed that Tara went off her meds and that her kids are embarrassed by her. The obnoxious slut Kate continues to act like an evil Bratz doll, Marshall is picked on by a vile teacher, Max is frustrated and another of Tara’s personalities emerges.

This personality is Alice a super efficient and caustic 50’s housewife. She deals with the evil teacher, washes Kate’s mouth out with soap, plots to get rid of Tara and calls Tara’ IUD: “Satan’s tree.” This just wasn’t funny.

Best Line:
Having multiple personalities is like hosting a kegger in your brain only you’re passed out cold while everyone else is just trashing the joint.”
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Kings Episode 11 Review

Javelin

David’s on trial and Jack is prosecuting. Michelle throws a tantrum and she’s pregnant. David’s self righteous, even more so when he learns of Cross’ coup. Reverend Samuels and Jack do their usual bipolar personality switches. Silas talks David into consequating his actions by pleading guilty. This causes Jack to yell and Silas to freak out. The coup begins. This was not good.

Best Lines:
Be the lamb or be the knife. Try to be both; you’ll end up slaughtering yourself.”

“The problem with great men is they don’t always die at their best.”

“You’re scared of your father. You should be.”
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Tape Tales: The shame of it

Cleared out two tapes, one from approx 1997 and the other from approx 2002. All I can say is: what was I thinking? The 1997 had three ‘Star Trek: Voyager’ eps on it and one ‘Star Trek: Deep Space Nine’.

The 1st ‘Voyager’ ep was ‘Future’s End part 2’ which saw the crew running around LA in 1996. Paris gets a love interest (Sarah Silverman) who has an annoying squeaky voice. An evil rich dude (Ed Begley, Jr) has a time ship from the 29th century. Cue techno babble, large ham acting, rednecks, another shuttle crash and huge helpings of smug and supercilious. This was dull and the holographic mobile emitter made its debut here. ‘Red Dwarf’ did it already.

Best Line: “Only you B’Elanna could start a brawl in Astro Theory 101.”

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The 2nd ‘Voyager’ ep was ‘Macrocosm’. This was the show in all its awfulness. It’s Janeway vs big flying killer viruses. This has it all: idiot plotting, idiot characters, bad CGI and utter stupidity.

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The 3rd ‘Voyager’ ep was ‘The Q and the Grey’. Q shows up as does his girlfriend and her cheap hair extensions. Q is sleazy. Kim and Paris hang out at their cheesy holodeck resort. There is horrible acting, writing and generally horrible everything. The dumbness shines through when the rickety barge and its half wit crew manage to fly their ship into the Q Continuum and end the Q civil war. Q and Q have a Q baby. Q says dotingly: “I’ve already taught him how to knock small planets out of orbit.” They made Q fluffy!

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The ‘Deep Space Nine’ ep was ‘Rapture’. Sisko has visions of the lost city of B’Hala. The storyline begun here actually cumulated in the novel ‘Unity’. Dr Bashir performs brain surgery on Sisko, except it isn’t Bashir. It’s a changeling which we find out several eps later. There is foreshadowing of the Cardassian alliance with the Dominion. Bajor is about to join the UFP until Sisko has a freak out. Kasidy returns after jail. Kai Winn is lost. This was very good.

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The 2002 tape had one ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’, one ‘Angel’, one ‘Charmed’ and one ‘Smallville’.

The ‘BTVS’ ep was the 6th season ep ‘Hell’s Bells’. Xander and Anya are about to marry. Buffy makes it all about herself as usual. The bridesmaids wear ill fitting dresses and Anya wears some tight mermaid dress with a shredded veil. There is idiot comedy until Xander has some fake visions of his pathetic life. Xander leaves Anya at the altar. Nobody comforts Anya. Buffy and Spike have their melodrama. Xander gets away with being selfish. This was dull and boring.

Best Line: “To my wife. What would I do without you beautiful? Well for starters I probably wouldn’t need to drink so much would I?”

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The ‘Angel’ was ‘Couplet’. Cordelia is selfish and obsessed with having sex with the Groosalugg. Angel coos over his baby son Connor. Wesley plots. Gunn and Fred bore and a killer tree with an internet connection eats people. This was dull.

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The ‘Charmed’ ep was season 4’s ‘Marry Go Round’. Phoebe and Cole are to marry but Paige is against it. Since when does Paige use tarot cards? Or sew? Or do aromatherapy? Or make face cream? Cole is possessed by the Source who plots a dark wedding to Phoebe. Speaking of Phoebe, she throws epic tantrums, shrieks and has a hideous veil. Paige glowers. The dark wedding takes place. This was okay but poor Cole, the sisters never even tried to save him.

Best Lines:
“We can’t throw rice.”
“Why not?”
The birds can’t digest it and they will blow up.”

“Only Prue could make my wedding day all about her.”

“Not two but one til life be gone.”

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The ‘Smallville’ ep was season 1’s ‘Reaper’ in which a man can kill with a touch, Lex is annoyed, Jonathan’s a jerk, Lana sobs and Clark sighs. This was worthless.
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Book Review: Ark

Ark by Stephen Baxter

This is the sequel to ‘Flood’. In ‘Flood’ the world was drowning as the last great flood overwhelmed civilisation. In a desperate bid to save humanity from extinction, an impossible dream was put into action. An ark to take 80 people to a new earth, a starship.

‘Ark’ is the story of that starship. Its construction, launch and destination. Ark One is conceived by the vastly rich as a way to save their children. It is a dream made possible by desperation and desperate acts. The technology to launch Ark One is still being built as the 80 berths are fought over.

As the water climbs ever higher, Ark One is launched and travels to the stars. But life on board is claustrophobic and riven by rivalries, pride and power struggles. The journey to any new earth will take decades and of those on board, some will walk on a new world and some won’t.

This is an excellent story. It’s tense, dramatic, tragic and hopeful. There are hints in this book that Baxter could write a 3rd novel in the sequence and I hope he does. ‘Ark’ is stunning, a relentless, inexorable tale of a seemingly impossible quest.

Best Lines:
“Say the right thing. Or else in five years you’ll either be dead or starving on a raft made of plastic trash.”

“This was one of the most common dreams, or nightmares, endured by the crew. Here were the last humans alive (possibly), fleeing through space in these metal hulls: What if there were a knock on the wall.”

“It’s a big empty Galaxy. Empty save for us. And that’s spooky.”