August 4th, 2009

Scary Books

Harper's Island Episode 9 Review

Seep

Shea whines some more, Shane's a jerk, Trish apologises to Henry and Abby learns that she may have a connection to Wakefield. The ads for this show promised action, chaos and horror and instead we get endless scenes of morons in rooms talking to each other. This isn't Scream 4, it's Friends: The New Generation. This week the pack of idiots investigate secret tunnels and someone's found, two people die and something is revealed. This was not good.

Main Suspect: Henry, he's coming across as the real bad brother with his violence.

Best Lines:
"How many hours till sunrise?"
"Too many."

"It's not like I'm Rosemary's Baby."

"There's no version of this that ends well."

"You really think anyone's ever going to stay here again?"
Scary Books

Veronica Mars Season 1 Eps 12, 13&14 Reviewed

Clash of the Tritons

Veronica is arrested for supplying fake ID, ironically it's the one crime she didn't commit. Veronica defends herself with annoying smugness and unearths a Neptune High secret society known as the Tritons. She also bugs the Guidance Counsellor's office and learns secrets about Weevil, Duncan and Logan. For instance she learns Weevil dated Lilly, that Logan blames her for his and Lilly's break-up and Lilly's murder and that Duncan has a mystery illness. Meanwhile Lynn Echolls can't take it anymore and jumps off a bridge.

Also it seems Logan has a sister named Trina, Aaron taking Logan's tacky SUV away in the pilot ep didn't last long, there's a mystery locker at the school and Veronica has no shame about invading people's privacy. Keith's terrible investigator skills are mentioned yet again and there is a hideous, gratuitous musical number. This ep does have the show's funniest ever line as Aaron rants about Lynn's tabloid revenge on him: "What was the plan? Embarrass me? Destroy my career?... Turn me into Costner?!?" Harry Hamlin's delivery of the Costner line is hilarious.

This was okay, but Veronica was too smug and Lamb too dumb. Why does Veronica always get away with taking advantage of people, lying and treating people like trash?

Best Lines:
"I heard it took three officers and a stun gun to haul your butt out of school."

"You don't remember being in this office? You slammed a chair against the wall."


~
Lord of the Bling
A rap producer's daughter Yolande is missing and Keith and Veronica are on the trail. Flashbacks show that the pastel loving Veronica was once friends with Yolande, until she saw Yolande and Logan kissing and told Lilly. The hypocritical Lilly shunned Yolande and Veronica joined in, oh bitter irony.

Meanwhile Aaron mourns Lynn and recalls how mermaids were Lynn's favourite animal, Logan however thinks his mother is alive and wants Veronica to find her.

This was one of the weaker episodes with Logan's character deficiencies on full display.

~
Mars Vs Mars

Veronica gets indignant when her beloved teacher, the irritatingly wannbe cool dude Mr Rooks is accused of impropriety by Carrie Bishop (Leighton Meesner of 'Gossip Girl'). Veronica is unsympathetic to Carrie and sets out on a personal vendetta to prove Mr Rook's innocence while Keith works for Carrie's parents. This investigation shows Veronica at her worst. She's smug, rude, hateful and practically calls Carrie a slut. Veronica also ignores blatant evidence that Mr Rook is indeed guilty. Why does everyone take Veronica seriously as a PI? When Mr Rook is indeed revealed as a sleaze, he does a walk of shame.

In-between being vile to Carrie, Veronica justifies her actions to a returned Deputy Leo and steals Duncan's medical records. Veronica learns about Duncan's mystery illness and the secret illness of Abel Koontz. Elsewhere Logan looks for evidences that his mother is alive only to end up viewing video footage of her swan dive off the bridge. This was okayish.

Best Lines:
"She wouldn't risk being found bug eyed and bloated in some shrimp net."

"White trash walking."
Scary Books

Various things

Read a review of 'Ark', the sequel to 'Flood'. Oh I want to read this.

The DVD extras on 'Watchmen' both suck and blow. Why isn't the trailer on the DVD? Anyway the DVD has audio description, did the guy who got the job cry when he saw that task? "My name is Ozymandias, king of kings. Look on my works ye mighty and despair!"

Saw a publicity photo for 'Eastwick' the TV series based on 'The Witches of Eastwick' and an almost unrecognisable Paul Gross (of 'Due South') plays Daryl Van Horne. Words fail me. I liked the movie and I saw the musical. So will the TV show be based on the movie or on the two novels 'The Witches of Eastwick' and 'The Widows of Eastwick'?
Scary Books

The Inside Episode 13 Review

Skin and Bone

'The Inside' comes to the end of its ill-fated run with this disturbing ep as everyone gets to do their actings. Rebecca is taken prisoner by a morbidly obese cannibal (William Mapother of 'Lost' dons a ludicrously unconvincing fat suit for the role.) Mel makes a lot of comments about how many times Rebecca has been kidnapped, Paul is Webb's man-bitch again and Rebecca has to escape a 'Saw' like situation.

Also in this ep is the first mention of Paul's wife in some time, an extremely clumsy 'Firefly' shout out and much time is devoted to how little the team know about Rebecca. The team view Rebecca's apartment and realise how disturbed she is, she never unpacked after her move to LA and only owns one plate. After Rebecca escapes from the house of horrors, the team bond at her apartment and bring her a pot plant.

This was okay, but how did the chair ridden villain rig up the doorbell trap? And how did he hide the bones in the crawlspace?

Best Lines:
"Maybe she had a hot date last night."
"I doubt that."

"A less socially aware Rambo."

"Nobody here really talks. Not about anything personal. They've all got these walls up around themselves."

"She gets taken, like it's a hobby"
"It is kind of on the freaky side of often."

"Paris Hilton would be a more credible as a Fed than you!"

"See what happens to lying liars who don't know their house manners!"

"You got stuck in your own trap."
Traveler

Trailers upon us once more

'Fragment' book trailer
Now that's nice and creepy, I'm looking forward to reading this.

'The Box' trailer
Cameron Diaz and James Marsden are offered $1 million dollars by Frank Langella to push a button. Or else. This looks odd and what is that awful wig on Diaz's head all about?

'District 9' trailer
Peter Jackson makes a movie about alien refugees, I think he burned himself out with the 'King Kong' remake.

'Warehouse 13' trailer
It looks like a mish mash of 'The X Files' and 'The Librarian'.

'The Perfect Getaway' trailer
A holiday turns nasty. Might go see it.

''Hey Sexy' music video by the Sugababes
Oh they are trying way, way too hard. Not only is the song bad but it samples (badly) 'I'm Too Sexy' by Right Said Fred.

Shakira's 'She Wolf' music video is not good and the song is dire.
Scary Books

Book Reviews: Losing the Peace + The Traveller in Black

Star Trek The Next Generation: Losing the Peace by William Leisner

This volume takes place between the 'Star Trek Destiny' trilogy and 'A Singular Destiny', so as a result nothing much actually happens. 'Losing the Peace'' is a place holder title. Worf and Picard are featured on the cover despite the fact the book doesn't centre on them.

The threadbare plot focuses on how many once comfortable Federation citizens are now refugees. Beverly Crusher heads to one refugee camp to assess the situation. Not that she really gets to do much. Crusher has no agency of her own, her life revolves around being Picard's wife and obsessing over her unborn son. Picard meanwhile is his usual self: gives pompous speeches, is self righteous, patronises Crusher, disobeys orders, kidnaps officials, saves the day, refuses a promotion and gets away with everything yet again. I'm tired of Picard.

I'm tired of how the author gives the majority of his female characters the old 'bad working mothers neglect their families' plot. I'm tired of how none of the characters seem human or real. I'm tired of the bratty character T'Ryssa Chen and how Trek authors seem to assume we love this stupid, selfish, obnoxious 'Gossip Girl' reject.

I'm annoyed that this book is a disposable tale that contributes nothing and that it will be forgotten as soon as 2010's 'Typhon Pact' novels are published. I'm tired of how stilted, stodgy and lacking the Trek novels seem lately in the wake of the revival movie. This year the vast majority of Trek novels have been under written failures too bogged down in their own continuity. Nothing seems fresh, new or exciting.

I fear that I am facing burn out on the Trek novels and if TPTB don't give me something soon to sink my teeth into, then they will lose me as a consumer.

~
The Compleat Traveller in Black by John Brunner

Collected in this slim volume are five tales of a mysterious traveller who wanders the world granting wishes and fighting the forces of chaos.

Imprint of Chaos
The weakest and worst written of the tales of the mysterious Traveller. Never ever make a wish in his presence.

Break the Door of Hell
The city of Ys comes into its doom as the Traveller observes. This was creepy and rather good.

The Wager Lost by Winning
A jaded nobleman gambles with anything until his mouth writes a cheque his body can't cash. This was good.

The Things That Are Gods
There's something in the lake in this okay tale.

Dread Empire
The Traveller drives chaos back some more in this finale to his travels.

This is a bizarre fantasy but it is well worth reading.