epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

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Movie Reviews: The Man Who Killed Hitler And Then The Bigfoot +Outcast + Thunder Force + Wake Wood

The Man Who Killed Hitler And Then The Bigfoot (2018)

This was a pretty grim pulp adventure. A socially dysfunctional man has a past. This was ghastly, cretinous, woeful ineptitude. This was daft nonsence and it lacks general sanity. In his youth, he shot Hitler and now he is asked to kill a sick Bigfoot.


This was absurd. This is a drama not a comedy or a spoof or a parody. It stars Sam Elliott, Aidan Turner and Ron Livingston.


Best Lines:

“Stories got stranger.”


“Very end of our world.”


“Beast with many names.”


“All of it coming true.”


“Nightmare plague.”


“Dying. Fast.”


“Contain the beast.”


“Mushroom bombs.”


“Working its way down the mountain.”


“Well remember you.”


“History marched on.”


“Miserable man: his words had grown beyond him.”


“What he started was unstoppable.”


“A coward first.”


“Easy to fool the stupid, the willing.”


“Killed a man, the monster lived on.”


“Nothing like the comicbook you want it to be.”


~
Outcast (2014)

Nic Cage features in this bizarre mishmash of a crusader movie and a kung fu film. There are unanticipated consequences and tensions and fighting and wariness and Hayden Christensen with a bad haircut. People are wary and war weary and this was mundane. Cage wears a bad wig and does a silly accent and gurns. This was terrible.


Best Line:

“Dark things of this world.”


~
Thunder Force (2021)

People deliberately antagonise, regardless of the consequences. This was a disappointment and this was appalling as arrogant and reckless irresponsible people do their cause little good. Melissa McCarthy and Octavia Spencer and Jason Bateman and Bobby Cannavale star. Miscreants rampage as they are bad people. This was padding. 2 old friends get a superhero serum. This was simply not good enough. This was really weird and emphatically awful. The 2 women put on silly outfits and drive a superhero car. Furtive baddies are dumb. This has dismal audacity. A guy with crab arms is a baddie. This annihilates interest This was all inadequancy. There no excessive realsim and this is a lasting blight on the world. This was more offensive than the norm. This was aggravating and dangerously foolish and volatile.


Best Lines:

“2 chicks in their 40s!”


“Awesome pumpup music.”


~
Wake Wood (2009)

A Hammer movie. A child is attacked by a rabid dog and dies. In Ireland. Which is rabies free since 1903. The child's useless parents are morons. Aidan Gillen mumbles. This was boring as hell. Even when the dead child comes back as a zombie menace.


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Tags: being human, movie review
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