epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Review: The Karate Kid (1984)

This spawned 3 sequels, a cartoon, a remake, comics and 'Cobra Kai'. Ralph Macchio, Pat Morita, Elisabeth Shue, Martin Kove and William Zabka star. Daniel LaRusso (Macchio) is in the strange land of LA, he is a hothead and has no friends. Johnny (Zabka) is the school bully. Daniel is allergic to sleeves and is skinny and his mother has a church lady perm. This was tiresome, they move into a grotty apartment building. A weirdo janitor (Morita) lurks. There is no collaboration, empathy or communication. Johnny ride his motorbike and harasses his ex Ali (Shue).

School bully/karate wannabe Johnny peaked in 1984 and Daniel has faltering dignity. 80S music blares and the bully and his posse does sullen glares and the bully is a radio stealing abuser mad psychopath who caused palpable anguish and was void of redeeming qualities. Johnny is the 80s movie bad guy who is precisely what kids had learnt to fear.

Why such a nostalgia boom around this film? Johnny has a persistent vendetta and is nasty near psychotic jerkass. This was banality and sorely lacking. Teens make gleeful assertions. Daniel's black eye and later injuries are ignored by his mother and school. This was flimsy. This film has no vibrancy or allure. Johnny keeps on meancing. This was wearisome and TPTB ignored increasingly contentious bullying.

There is venality and violence. Daniel has a bleak worldview and his mother ignores all the bullying and turmoil. Johnny never apologised for the grim relentless routine of bullying. How is the bullying seen as normal on any level? Daniel's desperate pleas are ignored. The sensei (Morita) speaks like a fortune cookie. This was pathetically banal. Johnny is unsufferable and belongs to the thug dojo Cobra Kai. There is an All Valley Karate Championship. Why isn't Johnny arrested for assault?

This was chronically unsatisfying. Johnny is on a truly calamitous path. Whatever the faults Johnny had and there were many,they paled in comparison to the increasingly strident demands of his evil mentor Kreese (Kove). This was unrevealing. There is no drama driven storytelling. Daniel is stricken and his mother is a nag. Daniel has spiralling panic. This movie defies adequate description. There are imbeclic circumstances and corrosive resentment. Daniel has to wash and wax cars. There is no searing intensity of purpose. This was facile. Daniel has desperate solitude.

Johnny holds views that will make him deeply unpoular in more enlightened times. This was fateful for Johnny, who'd always be haunted by the dark sins of his past. This was not even middling. Daniel is troubled. This film was little more than pretension. Johnny caused terror and misery and does a defence of his poor decision making. There is babbling about the crane technique. This is the grimmest time possible and this was not wrenching.

There are no female karate students. One is uncomprehending how Johnny's predatory stance and despicable trajectory went unpunished. Cobra Kai are not mesmerisingly merciless. Johnny is absolutely disgraceful. Things are fractious and dreadful. Johnny's world as he knew it collapsed after this film. This has no inherent appeal. This was ridiculous superficial and Johnny takes violent advantage.

Cobra Kai has cyncial fantaticism. This was disastrous. Cobra Kai is mercilesslly violent. A key moral test takes place. Daniel's mother is unwilling or incapable of assisting him or parenting him. Body By Jake was involved in this. Johnny is relentless. His and Daniel's feud would only intensify in the 21st century. Mr Miyagi mentors Daniel. Kreese is far less formidable than he thinks he is as he feuds with teenagers.

Johnny made Daniel's life intolerable and wasn't amenable. Johnny's downfall remains a priority. Johnny is contentious. One is weary of him. Johnny gets kicked in the face by the silly looking crane kick. There is no deep reflection. Chad McQueen was in this.

Best Lines:

“Isn't exactly a dump we're moving to.”

“End of the line.”

“You're telling me.”

“This place is a jump, you should go back to New Jersey.”

“Hot a nose for my own.”

“After, after.”


“Not at a Y, a good school.”

“You're dead meat!”

“Yes sensei!”

“Mercy is for the weak!”

“A man confronts you, he is the enemy!”

“Wax on, wax off.”

“Where do these cars come from?”


“Don't do me any more favours.”

“Teacher day, student do.”

Tags: movie review

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