epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: After The Screaming Stops+The Mercy+Blue Velvet +The Shape of Water+Black Water Abyss

Bros: After The Screaming Stops (2018)

This was a bad documentary about the one night only reunion of the 80s boy band Bros. Well 2 of the 3 former members anway. In the 80s Bros were made up of identical twins Matt and Luke Goss and Craig Logan. Now Craig isn't even mentioned or alluded to, just seen briefly in vintage footage. Luke and Matt are estranged and have long, endless fights.

This was like a bad parody. Matt and Luke have aged. Neither mention or acknowledge Craig. Former Brosettes show up to their concert. They did talentless plastic pop. Matt now does Las Vegas and Luke is an actor, whose career highlight was 'Blade 2'. Matt is horrible and one can see why Bros were nicknamed dross. Their reunion was one night only because their UK tour was cancelled due to poor ticket sales. Poor Luke.

Best Lines:

“Never ending apology.”

“Might not be learning excellence.”

“The kind of hatred that I had to live through was reserved for mass murderers.”

“Deemed as useless.”

“Industry has not got behind us over the years.”

The Mercy (2017)

A nonsensical account of sailor Donald Crowhurst and how failure and the media lead to his death and ruin. He was not a particularly likeable man and he was given to Proustain melancholy.

Blue Velvet (1986)

Kyle McLachlan stars in this classic. But I didn't like this film noir about acitvely horrible people.

The Shape Of Water (2017)

This Oscar winning film brings no pleasure. It's grinding nemo. This was extraordinarily solemn and truly mad. One feels intense dislike for this crashingly dull film.

Black Water: Abyss (2020)

This is an Australian creature feature that is a travesty and fanciful. There are no grave obligations and this was not interesting. Acrimony is stirred and this was pathetic and idiots go into a cave. This amplifies existing stresses and this was not truly torrid. Crocs lurk. There is no gun safety. Tourists are missing and there is raw trauma and this was very trivial. There dismissiveness and distaste. There is buried trauma and shame and consequences.

This has the worst aspects of horror films. One has painful awareness that this is a 'Descent' knockoff. The victims are above all, middle class. This was not an immense achievemnt. This has no real value. This was not of any significance. This was horrendous. There is nothing very jlly about this.

The characters are really, really dumb. This was not audacious. They are reckless and revolting types. They are in an inescapable situation created by mutually conflicting forces. There is callous disregard for sense or logic. There is nervous reflection.

Best Lines:

“Toss this.”

“What is that? Water? You're not pregnant are you?”

“Some nasty croc.”

“No one knows we're down here.”

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