epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,

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Movie Reviews: Wilding + Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight + St Agatha

Wilding (2018)

Brad Dourif and Liv Tyler star in this dull 'horror'. A girl is in a murky situation, she is kept locked up like a flower in the attic by Dourif. This was wearyingly predictable and increasingly ineffective and grotesquely boring. This tries for morbid exuberance and theatrical insanity.

This was not sagacious and years pass. There are no uncomfortable acts of desperation. There is bad old age makeup. She escapes and nonsense takes place. There is cultural inextricability and chronic and latent hostility. There are of course, consequences.

There is faux ingenuity and this has a complete inability to scare. This causes deep frustration and the girl gets no therapy. She lives with cop Liv Tyler and her brother. The girl seems to have minimal negative effects. There are moral judgments and she has a bath while Liv Tyler shaves her legs for her. Okay then. There is a less than rapturous reception for this unpalatable film. The brother makes out with the girl who is called Anna.

There is no moral canvas. A guy lives in the woods wrapped in what looks like a thrift store fur rug. This was not comprehensible and there are inequities. There is a reveal and choices have a devastating effect. There is disreputableness and truth is intimated. Anna is not human, like duh.

There are secrets and this was ridiculous. Watching this is to your detriment. This was not innovative. People do over dramatising and catastropising. Anna is subjected to unfair and unjust behaviour. Actions are misguided. This was empty and devoid of meaning. There is gurning and no integrity or openness. Anna in her true form ends up watching the Northern Lights with her baby.

Best Lines:

“Stay inside.”

“Is he in the better place?”

Nobody Sleeps In The Woods Tonight (2020)

This is a Polish 'horror' about teens sent to an anti-tech camp. This was dubbed. People who've dropped out of life and are owning their loserdom are dumped in the woods. Very little thought went into this at all. This is heading for someplace very bad. A devastating threat lurks or something. There are social decisions.

This causes increasing frustration and is something lethally dangerous out there or not? Will it please show up? This is not exactly Deiderot. This was a wasted opportunity and fretful teens are stupid. There is cultural inextricability and there are inextricable relationships. This was profoundly wrong and there is a communal terror.

There is no psychological devastation. This was not distressing. There is self indulgence and excesses. This was harmlessness. There is a poor dead deer. This was dubious and terrible. This was wretched and full of miseries. There are toxic emotions and this was not a terrifying prospect. Cantankerous teens lurk. One feels derision. There is clear contempt and growing disquiet and notoriously volatile brats. There is t&a. Enough! Enough!

Best Lines:

“Admire nature.”

“Cast the evils of modern civilization into the depths of hell.”

“I have my own channel on youtube.”

St Agatha (2018)

A woman goes to a convent. An evil convent. This was boring.

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