epiphany_maria (epiphany_maria) wrote,
epiphany_maria
epiphany_maria

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Movie Reviews: Rampage+Trial Of The Chicago 7+Crimes Of The Mind+Leprechaun Returns+Echoes Of Fear

Rampage (2018)

Dwayne Johnson and a giant ape star in this utterly woeful movie. A space station blows up and there is not a high degree of probability in this film. The space accident rains debris down on Earth. People blather on fruitlessly. There are gorillas and mumbling and no wit. This was less edifying. There are self sorry moods and a white gorilla.


There is bad VFX. Dwayne Johnson can talk to the animals. This was not edifying and Johnson and the white gorilla have an unshakeable bond. This was disinteresting. Why is a woman in tiny shorts? Animals in national parks are affected and grow. A grizzly dies. Animals become violent and aggressive. There is a persistent and deliberate pattern of behaviour by baddies.


A sample container was designed to withstand re-entry. Baddies seem badly dubbed. There are strange and fortuitous events. Baddies have unconcealed fervour for evil. They had a private space station which blew up in the prologue, they don't care. The rare white gorilla named George rampages. The space station was named Athena. The baddies motives are frustratingly vague and they engage in totally manipulative behaviour.


Baddies gleefully upset people and there are no spectacularly violent moments. This was not clever or relentless. This was not visceral or relentless. There is complacency and talk of crispr and this was based on an arcade game. Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Malin Akerman, Joe Mangariello and Naomi Harris co star in this cliche storm. There are a lot of bad vfx and bad accents and wilful disregard for logic.


Baddies die in hilariously violent ways. This was not magnificently barmy. This was stultifying dullness. This was not intellectually thrilling. This was hideously shallow, boring and joyless. Jack Quaid and Marley Shelton were in this. Johnson needs to do better films. Even 4 script writers couldn't make this good.


Best Lines:

“Test subject is loose!”

“Doctor, the test subject is a rat.”

“Not anymore!”


“We'll unlock the escape capsule when you secure the sample.”


“Hull integrity critical.”


“Jungle doesn't kill you, the poachers will.”


“You're the food.”


“Yes the escape pod blew up.”


“Wasn't exactly for the betterment of humanity.”


“Killers r us.”


“San Diego wildlife sanctuary.”


“I need that wolf dead or alive.”


“Justice League?”


“You didn't know about the 30 foot wolf?”


“I see a lot of redacted.”


“Levels of aggression you don't see in his species.”


“Weirdoes on the internet.”


“There's no we anymore.”


“Since when is complicity a crime?”


“Feeding the monster to the gorilla.”


~
The Trial Of The Chicago 7 (2020)

Aaron Sorkin wrote and directed this. There are barely any women in this film. There is vintage footage of the 1968 riots, LBJ, Vietnam, the draft and the deaths of MLK and RFK. Tom Hayden, Abbie Hoffman, Jerry Rubin and others are on trial for conspiracy to riot. It is a political set up trial being judged by an incompetent, biased judge.


Abbie has a wandering accent. The Black Panthers lurk. Mayor Daley is mentioned. Nixon is POTUS and Fred Hampton is seen. The trial drags on and on and on as they are accused of joint endeavour. They don't really know or like each other. This was unsettlingly true. This was horribly compelling.


There is jury rigging and a rift in the anti war community. Where were the protestors pissing? There is bra burning. Chicago had 50,000 soldiers on the streets. There are flashbacks and narcs and Allen Ginsberg and tear gas. The judge has the only black accused bound and gagged in court. Michael Keaton has a cameo. Hayden is blamed for provoking the riot.


Tom has vicarious victimhood. TPTB are change-averse. There is persistent condemnations. This was bleakly amusing and genuinely dusturbing. The legacy of the 1960s hangs grimly over today. Evil things can crumble. TPTB take irrational vengeance. Tom makes a statement about those KIA. There is a where are they now moment at the end. There is no mention of Jane Fonda. Sacha Baron Cohen, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Frank Langella, Eddie Redmayne and Mark Rylance co starred. This was good.


Best Lines:

“Rebels without a job.”


“Real revolution.”


“America I grew up in.”


“Bumper sticker patriots.”


“Why would the police start hitting me?”


“Mr Johnson's back home in Texas.”


“Take your very scary hats off.”


“Tell em to stay calm.”

“No.”


“We define winning differently.”


“Display of disrespect.”


“I don't care for your general tone.”


“So foreign to me.”

“Just like soap.”


“Cows are smarter than I think he is.”


“Public fornication.”


“We can't take grass.”


“Kicked his son out of the house for protesting the Vietnam war.”


“A lot of it is drugs.”


“Considered wrong in Honduras.”


“A witness who dresses like a growing man.”


“Idiot followers.”


“Know what was waiting for them on the other side.”


“The 60s never happened.”


“Populated by some terrible people.”


~
Crimes Of The Mind (2014)

There are almighty meltdowns in this woefully melodramatic film in which a woman claims a ranch cult has brainwashed her daughter. There was bad acting.


Best Line:

“Those people, they're not right.”


~
Leprechaun Returns (2018)

This was wholly unsatisfying crap.


~
Echoes Of Fear (2016)

A squeaky voiced woman and her hamster are in peril in this inept and sleazy film.

Tags: movie review, supernatural, the walking dead, true blood
Subscribe

Comments for this post were disabled by the author